In the winter of 1972, I was young and ignorant, and with a desire for the future, I embarked on a military journey. Xiao Zhengde, a young man born in Nanjiang County, Sichuan, waved goodbye to his family and stepped into the unfamiliar life of the army.
The years in Xinjiang
In the army in Xinjiang, I had a hard and fulfilling time. From an ordinary recruit, he gradually stood out and became an officer of the propaganda section of the regimental headquarters. My writing talent allowed me to stand firm and become a "celebrity" in the regiment, building deep relationships with the chiefs of various departments. In 1976, I received a notice from Tigan that it was an opportunity to change my fate. After I was promoted, I asked my superiors for family leave, and with a longing for my hometown, I stepped on the train home. Little did I know that going home this time would cause a family storm.
The hometown changes and does not change
Back in my hometown, I was surprised to find that the village in my hometown had changed dramatically. And I, as a veteran, have also become the focus of the village. So, in the summer, I donated 200,000 yuan to my hometown to repair the road and became a charity hero in the village. However, the complexity of family relationships has never left my heart at peace. My cousin, my wife's father, was a well-respected veteran in the village. However, due to a sensational emotional entanglement back then, my relationship with him has been at a freezing point. This relationship not only affected the family's relationship, but also made me stay away from my homeland for 40 years and never dare to go back.
Complex family background
I was born in 1951, and my parents came to Nanjiang County when I was very young to work as a long-term worker for the Xu family's landlords. My family was poor, and I was the hope of my family, and my parents cut back on food and clothing in order to provide for my education. However, due to special reasons, after the college entrance examination was cancelled, I could only work as a scorekeeper in the production team, and at that time my fate with Liu Mei began to sprout quietly.
The appearance of Liu Mei
Liu Mei, my classmate in primary and junior high school, has good conditions in her family, but she chooses to go home to farm. Our relationship gradually deepened, and on the eve of my enlistment, we decided to go to the palace of marriage. However, the decision to enlist in the military made our wedding confusing.
A turning point in the military years
In 1972, I enlisted in the army, and Liu Mei was waiting for me at home. After enlisting in the army, I became a "red man" in the regimental headquarters with my excellent written performance, and in 1977 I was promoted to propaganda officer. After Tigan, I desperately wanted to go home to see my loved ones, but when I got home, I was caught in a family storm.
Father's unintentional words
In my hometown, I saw the joy of my parents, especially when he learned that I had been promoted. However, at a dinner table, due to my father's unintentional words, my relationship with Liu Mei fell into a deep misunderstanding. Liu Mei was hurt by her father's words, and I struggled with a dilemma.
Liu Mei's dissatisfaction and resistance
Liu Mei's family was not satisfied with our marriage, thought that my family was in poor condition, and doubted that she would suffer in the future. Although Liu Mei insisted on her choice, my father's words made her family more suspicious. As a result, the family conflict escalated into a conflict between the two families. Due to the misunderstanding and her father's words, Liu Mei's family was deeply dissatisfied with our marriage. In a conflict, a fierce quarrel broke out between the two families, and finally the parting of Liu Mei and I became an inevitable ending. Liu Mei felt humiliated by my father's words, and I was caught up in family and emotional conflicts.
40 years of silence
After parting, I spent forty years in the army, but I never dared to return to my hometown. My father's unintentional words and misunderstandings made me lose my habitat in my hometown. 40 years of silence is a complete departure from family relationships, and it is also a precipitation of his own inner struggles.
Donate to build roads: a little bit of my heart for my hometown
Although he has been away from his hometown for 40 years, his longing for his homeland has never faded. In the summer of 2016, when I learned that my hometown village needed to repair a road, I did not hesitate to donate 200,000 yuan and became a charity hero in the village. This move was a sensation, but I understood that building roads was only a way to resolve family conflicts, but it could not make up for the shortcomings of the years.
Freezing point relationship: the estrangement between my cousin and me
Although I donated money to build roads in my hometown, my relationship with my cousin remained. Due to the emotional entanglement in the past, the interaction between us has never been harmonious. This became an insurmountable obstacle for me to return to my homeland, leaving me with regrets that cannot be erased on the land of my hometown. As the years go by, I have entered the twilight of my life, and looking back on the 40 years of absence, I deeply regret it. However, I was determined to return to my hometown and untie the knots in my heart. Although family relationships were once complicated, I believe that time can dilute everything, and sincere wishes can break all barriers.
Correspondence: Building a bridge between hearts and minds
In order to resolve the freezing point relationship, I began to exchange letters with my cousin. Through the text, we expressed our understanding and apologies to each other. These letters build a bridge between hearts and minds, allowing us to find resonance in the words and gradually break down the barriers between hearts.
Liu Mei's Marriage Contract: Finding Memories in Time
At the same time, I also reconnected with Liu Mei. After 40 years, the relationship between us has long since precipitated into a kind of maturity and tolerance. She is a mother, and I am a lonely old man. We didn't discuss the misunderstanding again, but looked for each other's memories in the passage of time. recalling the secret marriage back then, it seems to be a picture scroll of the years. We made a private life in a field in our hometown, and there was no gorgeous wedding, only a tacit understanding between hearts and minds. This experience has become a secret we all share, and it is also a precious memory witnessed by the years.
Letter of introduction and registration with the Civil Affairs Bureau: Regain the warmth of the family
In order to solve the misunderstanding of that year, I prepared a letter of introduction, sincerely expressing my helplessness and regret back then. With the understanding and support of my uncle and Liu Mei, we re-entered the Civil Affairs Bureau and completed the official registration of the family. At this moment, I felt the warmth of family regained.
The determination to return to his hometown: to make peace with his homeland
Now, with a deep attachment to my homeland and a determination to reconcile with my family, I have embarked on the journey home. The 40 years of being away from home have made me understand that the warmth of family trumps everything, and the dilution of the years has made the misunderstanding insignificant. The 40 years of mental journey are the ups and downs of my military years, and also the hardships of my years away from home. Now, I have finally crossed the threshold of my homeland and returned to the embrace of my hometown. This return is not the end, but a new beginning, the beginning of reconciliation with the family.
Conclusion: Return to your hometown and find peace of mind
When I returned to my hometown, I returned with thoughts of my family, reflections on the past, and hopes for the future. The passage of time has made the former contradictions insignificant, and the warmth of the family has become the most precious treasure. In every inch of my homeland, I find peace of mind and spend the rest of my life with my family.
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