Not being humble or arrogant, not accommodating, is the way for men and women to get along.
01
What is a couple and what is love?
Unequal love is destined to end tragically.
Gain an inch, it will only make the other party enter.
The suicide of a fat cat some time ago is a vivid example.
02
But the impact of the fat cat incident is still there, but it has not attracted enough attention from some people, let alone some people who are in a weak position in a romantic relationship, to have enough introspection and vigilance.
The fat cat's sister is openly collecting evidence and has no intention of letting Tan Zhu go.
Tan Zhu also posted many late-night counter-attacks, denying that he cheated money, fished women, and PUA.
Unexpectedly, Tan Zhu's former "girlfriend" and fat cat's ex-girlfriend also came out to slap her in the face.
When everyone was feeling sorry for the fat cat and criticizing Tan Zhu for being shameless, a similar incident happened again.
03
On May 5, a vicious incident occurred in Ningbo where a woman stabbed her boyfriend to death.
Xu, a 24-year-old woman, had an argument with her boyfriend over trivial matters. During the dispute, the woman Xu stabbed her boyfriend in the neck with a fruit knife, and then dialed 120 to send her boyfriend to the hospital, but he died after rescue.
04
What kind of contradiction and what kind of quarrel will make a woman want to stab her boyfriend directly in the neck with a knife. Such a vicious and vicious act of murder occurs between couples who are in love, it is abnormal, and there must be a reason.
Sure enough, the victim's man's sister revealed the truth of the incident after sorting out the chat records and memories of the past between the two.
The two met and fell in love five years ago.
In the past five years, men have suffered from domestic violence and psychological torture from women for a long time, including slapping, slapping in the face with slippers, pinching flesh, pushing down stairs and causing fractures.
In addition, the woman also threatened the man with acts such as jumping off the building and coerced the man to kneel. Some threats and intimidation were also used to make men afraid to break up with him.
At the same time, women have high consumption, but do not work for a long time, and rely purely on men for support. In order to meet his request, the man also had to work part-time after work, delivering food to the supermarket.
Although the man suffered such unequal treatment during the relationship, in front of his parents and sister, he still had to work hard to protect his girlfriend, and said that some of the injuries caused by the beating of the woman were accidentally injured.
05
The root cause of the woman stabbing the man to death was only that the two of them had a quarrel over taking wedding photos, which caused the woman to lose control of her emotions and pick up a fruit knife and stab the man in the neck...
Some people say that this is a woman's problem, a person's emotional instability, caused by a mistakenly fault, not subjective intentional homicide.
I don't agree with this statement, I have the opposite opinion.
The woman is subjectively intentional homicide, and it is the intentional act of the "evil" in the woman's heart being stimulated and encouraged to an expansive state.
06
The evil in human nature can easily be stimulated by the "goodness" of others
Whether the woman is originally a wicked person, whether she has the urge to kill in her bones, this lightning rod cannot be judged.
What I can imagine is that perhaps at the beginning of their acquaintance, the two still respected each other and had an equal relationship.
And as the relationship between the two continues to heat up, and in the process of becoming intimate and familiar, the relationship between the two genders has tilted.
Perhaps it is the repeated tolerance and tolerance of men to women, or the repeated words and deeds of women, which gradually emerge a situation in which women are becoming more and more powerful and men are becoming more and more humble.
Perhaps at the beginning of their acquaintance, in the process of the man's pursuit of the woman, there were already behaviors similar to "kneeling and licking" and "extravagance".
In order to win the favor of women, or the so-called "love", men put their posture very low, and paid a lot of money, emotions, and emotions.
However, women take men's efforts for granted, as a condition for "agreeing" to men's pursuits, and then firmly occupy a strong and dominant position at the psychological level.
The feeling of being pursued, sought after, and satisfied makes women like and depend.
Maybe it's just that she is used to being "spoiled" by men like this, and the "evil" in women's hearts towards men is stimulated in this way.
07
The evil in human nature is also fueled by "forbearance".
In the five years of getting along, instead of improving, the strength of such a party and the weakness of the other side have become even more disparity.
Through verbal abuse, beatings, jumping off buildings, etc., women continue to inflict physical and mental destruction and oppression on men.
And the man's resistance, breakup and other stop-loss behaviors were all resolved by the woman's threat.
The woman deeply felt the pleasure and satisfaction brought by "evil" to herself, and felt the control and control of men in words and deeds.
Ji Xianlin, a master of Chinese culture, said:
It is simply impossible to think that as long as you swallow your anger and bow down at the feet of the wicked, the wicked will let you go.
The wicked are wicked because they are cruel and ruthless.
In the past 5 years, she has become accustomed to such a condescending mode of getting along, accustomed to men obeying her, and accustomed to being arrogant.
Her evil, her desire to control, has been fueled again and again.
The quarrel over taking wedding photos was a fuse, and we don't know what point of disagreement the two had in the quarrel.
But there is a high probability that the man's attitude is tough, beyond the imagination of the woman. It made the woman have thoughts such as "being provoked", "committing a crime", "he dared not listen to me".
In the eyes of women, this kind of thinking is a manifestation of "disobedience" and "challenging authority", a manifestation that must be stifled, and a manifestation that is absolutely not allowed.
In a fit of rage, the woman stabbed the man in the neck with a knife.
Her cultivated "evil" has also been promoted to the peak.
08
We often hear people say not to surround themselves with emotionally unstable people, because we don't know when they will go crazy.
That makes a lot of sense, but I would like to add a few more.
In the process of getting along with people for a long time, especially between lovers and husband and wife, if the relationship between the two begins to be unequal, and the strong party is getting stronger and stronger, and the communication is ineffective, if the weak party is really unbearable, we must learn to withdraw in time and stop the loss in time.
At the same time, the weaker party must not use love, money, and dedication to curry favor and try to change the attitude of the other party.
Just like the fat cat incident, flattering again and again, instead of getting the love and touching of his girlfriend, has become a "weak" behavior that makes his girlfriend feel better and better.
I spent so much money, but just to get a smile from my girlfriend, I can only get a smile.
The process of getting along with the two is like two sheep in a cage, and the two respect each other and live in harmony for a long time.
If one of them is a wolf in sheep's clothing, the difference between strong and weak will appear sooner or later. At that time, no matter how much the weak sheep pleased the wolf, it was difficult to get rid of being oppressed and humiliated, and finally it was difficult to escape the fate of being eaten.
09
The man tried to flee and offered to break up. But he was threatened by the woman with jumping off the building and committing suicide, and finally chose to compromise.
I think the reason why the man compromised is probably based on his understanding of women, and thinks that women can do extreme behaviors such as jumping off buildings.
As a result, I was worried and afraid, worried that my resolute breakup behavior would lead to the woman really jumping off the building to commit suicide, and she would bear a heavy psychological burden.
He is pathetic.
In fact, in that case, you should choose to break up and leave decisively, and you should think more about yourself.
When he believes in his heart that the other party can commit extreme actions such as jumping off a building and committing suicide, he should think about himself.
That's the main thing I want to say.
When we meet someone who can do extreme behavior, the best way is not to compromise and regress, to think about the other person.
It's about getting out and getting away more quickly and decisively.
It's not about hurting the other person, it's about protecting yourself.
Some people are not worthy of love, not worth saving, not worth redeeming, not worth remembering.
There are some people who you can save once, but you can't save a lifetime.
There are people who you saved him, but he turned around and pushed you into the abyss.
10
Whether it's getting along with people or falling in love with people, at first everyone will wear a false mask of friendliness, and we can't see through it at a glance.
This is human nature, and it is also human instinct.
Some have thin masks that are shallow and shallow hidden; Some people have thick masks and hide deeply.
People who hide very shallowly are generally not very different in nature; And the people who hide very deeply, in general, are very different.
The reason why it is hidden is nothing more than to deceive people and take the bait.
And when we have the opportunity to see the real face under the mask, it can actually make us decide whether to go or stay.
11
When people get along with others, what is needed is sincerity, not deceit and intrigue!
As the old saying goes, "Those who stir-fry must wait for those who eat!" And those who eat may not wait for those who stir-fry!
There are always some people in this world who have no conscience and think that what you do is what you should do! ”
This life is very short, and it is necessary to be with people who are comfortable, including lovers, relatives and friends.
Some relationships, when you feel tired, stay away. Pleasing others is far better than cultivating oneself, preferring to be arrogant and lonely than to go against one's heart.
I am the lightning rod of summer, the original article was first published on the public account "summer lightning rod", welcome friends to search and subscribe~