"Zhang Wei, come here. "The voice of the boss came from the office.
My heart tightened, and I secretly prayed that it would not be bad news. Walking briskly over, I saw the boss and the HR manager sitting there with a serious look on their faces.
"What's wrong?" I asked, forced to composure.
"Your company is going to lay off employees, I'm sorry, you were included in this layoff list. The HR manager got straight to the point.
Countless images of working overtime late into the night flashed through my mind. Those days of working overtime all night have been forgotten like this? I worked tirelessly in the company, and I never complained of being tired. I genuinely consider this company to be my own business.
But now, it was ruthlessly laid off. I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, there is anger, unprecedented anger at this practice of the company. On the other hand, there is also some self-blame, maybe I should have found new development opportunities sooner rather than put all my eggs in this basket.
I interrupted him, "But it's just going to sweep me out of the house, right?" I took a deep breath and forced myself to calm down. I didn't look away, not wanting to look at the look of pity that seemed to be from my boss.
I think that's more hurtful than being fired. I straightened my back and tried to keep myself reserved: "I see. So, when do I need to leave?"
The HR manager looked at the document in his hand and said, "According to the procedure, you still have a one-month buffer period. This is the month when you can think about your next steps. "
I nodded, stood up, and walked out without looking back.
I went back to my workstation and found that Lin Jia was already waiting there. She was my best friend and the female colleague I had a crush on for two years. Seeing her concerned eyes, my feelings became complicated again.
"What's wrong? Are you alright?" Lin Jia asked.
I sighed and told her about the layoffs. Her eyes instantly widened in disbelief: "How is that possible? You are the backbone of the company! This is ridiculous!"
"yes, I didn't expect that. I smiled helplessly, "It seems that I am so naïve and have wasted too much effort here." "
Lin Jia held my hand and said sincerely: "Don't say that, you have made a great contribution to the company. This decision is pure absurdity and has nothing to do with you. "
I looked at her warm eyes, and my heart ached. How I've secretly fallen in love with this girl in the past two years. Unfortunately, she already had a boyfriend, and I never mustered up the courage to confess to her.
Too much is not flooding my mind. I began to regret that I didn't have the courage to do so, that I had wasted too much of my youth in this company that looked good but was ruthless at heart. I began to doubt my past life choices and doubt everything.
This suspicion was like a sharp blade, cutting my heart apart little by little. I began to feel more lost and fearful about the future than I had ever felt before. Being made redundant means that I will lose my regular source of income, but what is even more terrifying is that I will lose my purpose and direction in life.
For the past two years, I have been so wholeheartedly engaged in my work that I have made it my own. And now, that road has come to an abrupt end. I will stand helplessly at the crossroads of my life, overwhelmed.
I sat in front of the computer with my head down, completely out of the mood to work. Lin Jia was still by my side, comforting me from time to time. But her words seemed to come from a distant place, and only a void echo remained in my ears.
My hands unconsciously tapped on the keyboard, making a dull sound. My eyes were empty and confused, as if I was staring at some unseen future. Seeing this, Lin Jia sighed and didn't say anything more.
My phone rang suddenly, waking me up from my confusion. I looked at the caller ID, it was my mom calling. I took a deep breath before pressing the answer button.
"Hey, Mom?"
"What's the matter, kid, is there something wrong with listening to your voice?" Mom was keenly aware of my abnormality.
I nodded, and my tone was a little firmer: "yes, I'll think about it." "
In this way, I slowly calmed down the turmoil in my heart and regained some fighting spirit. I will think carefully about my next path in life, no longer running blindly, but choosing according to my own wishes.
Just as I was coming out of the haze of being laid off, something exciting happened.
"Zhang Wei, you have great news to share with you. One day, Lin Jia came to me in a hurry.
"What's the good news?" I asked, confused.
"I'm getting married!" Lin Jia said happily, with a happy smile on her face, "My boyfriend proposed to me, and I agreed!"
"Thank you, you must be my best man!" Lin Jia said happily.
My heart was pricked again. Being a best man? Watching a girl you've had a crush on for two years marry someone else? It's cruel!
But I nodded anyway and pretended to be nothing.
After Lin Jia left happily, I sat down in my chair, and my whole person fell into unprecedented depression and despair.
In the past two years, my crush on Lin Jia has been the biggest motivation to support me forward. I was so eager to one day be able to muster up the courage to reveal my heart to her, and then we could be happily together. But now, that dream has been shattered.
I began to regret that I didn't have the courage to do so. If I had mustered up the courage to confess to her at that time, maybe I wouldn't have ended up where I am today. I began to hate myself for being timid and timid, and hated that I had missed Lin Jia, the most important person in the past.
The self-blame, pain, and despair in my heart completely drowned me like a dark tide. I felt like a ridiculous clown who had expectations for this doomed crush. I was so stupid and naïve to do such a humiliating thing.
My whole being was in a state of decadence that I had never experienced before. I sat listlessly in front of the computer, my eyes passing through the computer screen, through this office, as if through the whole world, falling into nothingness.
My hands hung limply at my sides, allowing the minutes to pass. My eyes were dull, the corners of my mouth drooped limply, and I felt like a walking corpse.
My colleagues saw what was wrong with me, but no one came forward to comfort me. They all seemed to feel the despair in me, knowing that any comfort was in vain now.
I sat like this for a day, motionless, as if I had lost all contact with the world. It wasn't until it was completely dark and I was the only one left in the office that I finally had a reaction.
I stood up and staggered out of the office. I walked to a river, which flowed slowly without a single wave. I gazed at the tranquil river, my eyes glazed over.
Just as I was feeling the urge to do so, my phone rang. I was stunned for a moment, took out my phone from my pocket, and found that it was a call from an unknown number.