Lead
"Wife, what's the child's last name?"
"Of course it's my surname, I'll support your whole family!"
"No, no, we can't marry our daughter, I'll support your whole family!"
"Then don't get married, my family still has no shortage of sons!"
Sometimes the father himself will choose to let the child take the mother's surname, which will cause discussion and controversy, so what are the cultural differences behind the parents naming their children?
What are the considerations and conflicts between parents when choosing whether to let their children take their father's or mother's surname?
1. Cultural differences in the names parents give to their children.
In the mainland, a name is an extremely important thing, a person's name often means a person's life, so the ancients said: "If the words are appropriate, everyone will naturally be satisfied." ”
When parents give their children names, they often pursue good and rare names, because once the name becomes popular, it is easy to have duplicate names.
In ancient times, there were often certain rules when choosing names, such as: "The eldest man takes the father's name, the eldest daughter takes the mother's name, and so on." ”
So in ancient times, some people would call: "Li Si, Li Si, bring me two catties of pork." ”
There will even be a proverb: "One surname, two kings, three Li, four Zhang, five Chen, six weeks, seven kings, and eight Liu." ”
This is also because there were many people in ancient times, so the phenomenon of duplicate names was very serious.
But now, with the continuous opening of people's concepts, the tradition of paternal surnames still exists, but there are also cases of taking the mother's surname, which sometimes even causes some controversy.
Originally, there was a situation in the mainland with the mother's surname in ancient times, but due to the continuous deepening of feudal thinking, the situation with the mother's surname slowly disappeared.
However, among the ethnic minorities in the mainland, there is still a phenomenon of taking the mother's surname, so in some parts of the mainland, there will also be people who choose to let their children take the mother's surname.
When parents name their children, they often have certain rules, such as the father must be the son's biological father, and the mother must be the daughter's biological mother.
However, in the mainland, due to the continuous deepening of feudal thinking, there was often a saying in ancient times, that is: "If you marry a daughter, what you marry is water, what you marry is not water, what you marry is the reputation of your daughter's family." ”
So in ancient times, after a daughter got married, she was often asked to change her man's surname, and in ancient times, people thought that women were the people of their mother's family, and men were men's people, so women were not important.
In ancient times, women were often considered to be burdens, so when a woman got married, her mother's family often gave a dowry, so a dowry was often equivalent to reducing the burden of marriage on a woman.
So in ancient times, there was a saying, that is: "Men should marry, and women should marry." ”
This means that when a man is older, he will get married, but when a woman is older, he will have to marry, so the older the woman, the less valuable she is.
But because a woman is a member of her mother's family, after a woman gets married, she often changes to the man's surname, and the man has to pass on his surname, but in ancient times, there was often a problem, that is: "The son inherits the father's business, and the daughter marries out, that is, she is a daughter-in-law for someone else, so the woman is not important." ”
So in ancient times, it was often the father who gave the child a name, but in ancient times, the status of women was very low, so in ancient times, some women would be given an unlucky name by their father, such as: "bitter, sour, salty, spicy, stinky, rotten, thin, fat." ”
So in ancient times, women often had no status, but with the continuous progress of society, the status of women has also been improved, so now, sometimes people choose to let their children take their mother's surname, and fathers will also choose to let their children take their mother's surname, causing some discussion and controversy.
2. All aspects involved in choosing a name.
When parents give their children names, they often have some rules, such as: "The name cannot be the same, the name must not be unlucky, the name must not be unpleasant, and the name must not be rare." ”
And in ancient times, there was also a saying: "The name should not be too long, the name should not be too short, the name should not be too obscure, but it should not be too common." ”
So in ancient times, naming a name was often a very elaborate thing, and in ancient times, fathers often had some partiality when naming their children, because in ancient times, the status of fathers was very high, so fathers often hoped that their sons could inherit their mantle.
Even in ancient times, there was a saying: "The son inherits the father's business, and the daughter marries out to be a daughter-in-law to others, so the woman is not important, so the father gives his son a name, often gives a very individual name, but for the daughter, it will not be so particular, often just a random one." ”
When fathers give their children names, they often give them a very individual name, but for their daughters, they are not so particular, and they often give a very ordinary name, so in ancient times, some women would be given an unlucky name by their fathers, so in ancient times, women often had no status.
But with the progress of the times, people's thinking is also constantly changing, so now when naming children, they are often named according to the child's gender, but in ancient times, this was not the case.
So nowadays, when parents choose a surname for their child, they often encounter some questions, that is: "Does the child take the father's surname or the mother's surname?"
This question often revolves around factors such as family power, traditional concepts, gender equality, etc., and when parents choose their children's surnames, they often involve the family relationship of their parents, so parents often have some conflicts when choosing their surnames.
Therefore, when parents choose their children's surnames, there are often some conflicts, and some fathers think: "I am the pillar of the family, so of course the children should take their father's surname." ”
But some mothers think, "I am the one who gave birth to the child, so of course the child takes the mother's surname." ”
Therefore, when parents choose their children's surnames, there are often some conflicts, and some families in order to avoid conflicts between parents, so when naming their children, they often add both the father's surname and the mother's surname, so the child's name will be very long.
For example: Li Xinxin, Zhang Xinxin, Yang Xinxin, such names sound very weird, so when naming names, there are often certain rules, such as: "Father's name is in front, mother's name is in the back, and a "·" is used in the middle. Separated. ”
Such a name sounds very good, and there will be no duplicate names.
3. Family Concepts and Choices.
When parents choose their children's surnames, they often have their own ideas, so someone once initiated such a topic on the Internet: "Will you choose to let your child take the father's surname or the mother's surname?"
Many netizens left messages: "I will choose to let my child take his father's surname, because I am a man, and men are the pillars of the family." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his mother's surname, because my family is headed by a woman." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his father's surname, because my family is headed by a man." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his mother's surname, because my family is headed by a woman." ”
Someone even left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his father's surname, because I am a man, men are the pillars of the family, and my family still lacks a son." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take the mother's surname, because my family is headed by a woman, and my family has no shortage of sons." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his father's surname, because I am a man, men are the pillars of the family, and my family still lacks a woman to be in charge, if you don't marry, I will also marry." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take the mother's surname, because my family is headed by a woman, and my family has no shortage of sons, if you don't marry, I will also marry." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take his father's surname, because I am a man, men are the pillars of the family, and my family still lacks a son, if you don't give birth, I will give birth too." ”
Some people also left a message: "I will choose to let the child take the mother's surname, because my family is headed by a woman, and there is no shortage of sons in my family, if you don't give birth, I will give birth too." ”
It can be seen that parents often have their own ideas when choosing whether to let their children follow their father's surname or their mother's surname, which is the pluralism and individualization of family concepts.
So now, it can be seen that people's cognition of family relationships and traditional concepts is diverse, so now, there will be a lot of family structures, and some families will choose to let their children take their father's surname, which is also because the father is a man, so of course the child should follow the father's surname.
Some families will choose to let their children take their mother's surname, which is also because the mother is a woman, so of course the child will take the mother's surname, but some families will add both the father's surname and the mother's surname.
Therefore, it can be seen that the family structure and values are constantly evolving and reconstructing, so now, more families will choose to let their children take the surnames of both parents, which means that the status of men and women is equal.
epilogue
So nowadays, sometimes parents choose to let their children take their mother's surname instead of their father's surname, but some people think: "Both parents are the biological parents of men, so of course children take their father's surname." ”
But there are also people who think: "The mother is born to a woman, so of course the child takes the mother's surname." ”
Therefore, when parents name their children, there are often some conflicts and contradictions, but this is also because of the parents' love for their children, so when naming their children, they are often considered comprehensively.