"Child, you're almost thirty years old, it's time to think about getting married. Mom said with concern, "Your father and I hope that you can start a family and live a happy life as soon as possible." "
Every time I hear my parents mention blind dates, my heart is full of boredom and resistance. I wasn't as eager to get married as soon as they expected. On the contrary, I prefer to live a free and comfortable single life and do not want to be bound by the shackles of marriage. I question whether the traditional concept of marriage is really suitable for modern society, and whether there is any other way of life that can lead to happiness.
The concerned eyes of my parents always made me feel a little weak. I subconsciously avoided their gaze and sighed. We've talked about this countless times, but each time I can't get them to really understand what I'm thinking. I can appreciate their kindness, but I just can't agree with them.
"Xiao Li, this is the person we are dating today, Ms. Zhang. Mom enthusiastically introduced, "Ms. Zhang is an excellent staff member of the unit, and her character is very good. "
Ms. Zhang smiled politely at us: "Hello, it's a pleasure to meet you. "
I managed to squeeze out a smile and nodded at her.
In the process of blind date, my heart always has a match. From time to time, I would unconsciously wander my mind, my eyes would be distracted, and my mind would be thinking about something that had nothing to do with the blind date. And Ms. Zhang seemed to notice my abnormality, and from time to time she would look at me with an inquiring gaze, as if she was guessing my inner thoughts.
Ms. Zhang's speech is very decent, but I can feel her traditional concept of marriage and family from her words. She believes that marriage is an important stage in life, and having a family will become more stable and responsible. Her views were completely contrary to mine, and I felt that her ideas were too conservative and stale.
We didn't talk much, but the atmosphere was always very good. Ms. Zhang seemed to feel this too, her expression became more and more restrained, and her words became more and more cautious. I can understand her frustration because we are so incompatible with each other.
"Xiao Li, what kind of sports do you like best?" Ms. Zhang tried to lighten the mood and initiated a topic of conversation with me.
"I usually like to play chess and read books. Ms. Zhang replied, "I think outdoor sports are too tiring and meaningless. "
"But hiking is a great way to get close to nature and relax, which is good for your physical and mental health. I argued.
"I think it's good to live in peace and quiet, and there is no need to add so much trouble to yourself. Ms. Zhang smiled, and there was a hint of compromise in her tone.
This blind date pattern makes me feel extremely disgusted and bored. How can we really understand and appreciate each other because we are people of two worlds, and our lifestyles and values are very different? I think this kind of practice of treating marriage as a "blind date" is too superficial and utilitarian, and it ignores the importance of the feelings between people.
I reflect on my current state of life, I am in the prime of my life, my career is getting better, and my income is starting to stabilize. I enjoy the independent and free way of life, which allows me to pursue my interests as I want without any constraints. However, my parents always hoped that I could start a family as soon as possible and live the so-called "great gift of life". I was troubled and wondered if I should really follow my parents' expectations.
I fell into deep reflection and began to reflect on whether my attitude towards marriage was too paranoid and simplistic. Marriage should not be seen as some utilitarian transaction, but it is also an important stage in life that can bring new experiences and joy. Maybe I should be more open-minded and look at this with a more inclusive lens.
During the blind date, my interaction with Ms. Zhang seemed very stiff and unnatural. Most of the time we talk on our own, and we rarely really reach a tacit understanding. A few times we even spoke at the same time, then stopped and motioned for each other to speak first.
Ms. Zhang seemed to be able to feel this, her expression became more and more restrained, and her words were intermittent. I can understand her frustration because we are so out of place that we can't find a common language. The atmosphere of the blind date has always been very tense, and there is an inexplicable sense of depression.
After the blind date, I finally couldn't hold back the depression in my heart and had a heated argument with my parents.
"But Xiao Li, you're so old, it's time to start a family. We're just doing it for your own good. Mom eagerly explained.
"Even if you have good intentions, it's too hard for people to do it! You can't understand how we young people think and live. I retorted emotionally.
"So what do you want? Do you want to be a bachelor like this for the rest of your life?" Dad said dissatisfied.
"I'm certainly not going to be single forever, but I'm not bound by your expectations either. Marriage is a matter for two people, and it should be up to us to decide. I insisted.
My disappointment with my parents is growing day by day. Why can't they really understand me? It's not that I don't want to get married, I just don't want to be bound by this way. In my opinion, marriage should be based on two people's genuine love for each other, not out of parental expectations or social pressure. But parents just can't accept this view, they think that if they follow the traditional way, they will definitely find happiness.
I began to wonder if I was really ready to face the challenges of marriage. Maybe I'm just shirking my responsibilities and not being willing to do my part. But deep down, I felt that I was right and should not be swayed by my parents' expectations. I was in a state of confusion and struggle like never before, and I didn't know where to go in my life.
During the argument, my parents and I were both excited and fierce. I frowned tightly, my hands clenched and released at my sides. Mom's eyes were red and she seemed to be about to cry. Dad stared at me with disappointment and helplessness in his eyes.
The three of us were at a stalemate, and no one could convince anyone. Eventually, we parted ways and went back to our rooms. I slammed the door shut and shut myself up. Tears flowed down my cheeks, and I felt that I had been too my parents, but I couldn't change my mind.
"Actually, you both have some truth. After listening to this, Xiao Wang said slowly, "You young people should indeed have your own independent lifestyle, but your parents' actions are also out of good intentions. "
"So what should I do?" I asked helplessly, "I can't change my mind anymore." "
"You should try to understand your parents and feel their intentions with empathy. At the same time, you need to make them understand your situation and seek mutual understanding. Xiao Wang suggested, "Communication is the key to solving problems. "
Xiao Wang's words opened me up to a whole new way of thinking. I began to reflect on whether my previous attitude was too stubborn and headstrong. Although my parents are a bit traditional, they just care too much about me, and they are afraid that I will not have a good life in the future. And I didn't take their feelings into account at all, and just insisted on my own opinion.
I realized that I needed to look at this with a more open and inclusive mind. Marriage is a private matter, but it is also a matter for the whole family. We should be considerate and understanding of each other, rather than resting on our laurels. Perhaps with patient communication, we will be able to find a mutually acceptable solution.
Xiao Wang's concerned eyes made me feel a little warm. He stretched out his hands, patted me lightly on the shoulder, and comforted: "Don't blame yourself too much, this kind of generation gap contradiction is a normal thing." As long as you can communicate and understand each other, you will definitely be able to resolve your differences. "
I nodded, and the stone in my heart seemed to have shed some weight. Xiao Wang's words rekindled my hope, and I believe that as long as we understand each other, we will be able to find a solution that satisfies both parties.
That evening, I invited my parents to sit in the living room and was ready to talk to them.
"Mom and Dad, I know that you are doing this with good intentions, hoping that I can live a happy life. "But you also have to respect my ideas and values as an individual." "
My parents looked at each other, as if they didn't expect me to start like this.
"It's not that I don't want to get married, I just don't want to be confined to the traditional concept of marriage. I continued, "Marriage for me should be about two people who are united voluntarily and equally on the basis of mutual understanding and appreciation. It shouldn't be a deal arranged by parents. "
"But Xiao Li, we're just doing this to create more opportunities for you. "After all, marriage is the most important thing in a person's life, and of course we want you to find the perfect fit." "
"I understand your kindness, but blind dates don't really let us know each other. I said sincerely, "It's better to let me take the initiative to find out and meet the person I like in my own way." Do you trust my judgment?"
Although the parents' approach is somewhat traditional, their intentions are not malicious. They just doted on me too much, afraid that I would not have a good life in the future, so they would do everything possible to arrange my marriage. I began to reflect on whether my previous attitude was too paranoid and simplistic. Marriage is certainly a private matter for individuals, but it is also about the honor and disgrace of the whole family. I should look at this with a more open and inclusive mind, rather than resting on my laurels.
At the same time, I hope that parents can truly understand the thoughts and situations of our young people. Although marriage is a major event for everyone, in modern society, we are more interested in the realization of personal values, and we are more eager for freedom and independence. We don't want to be bound by the pattern of life, but we want to be able to choose the path of life according to our own wishes. This notion is not a rejection of marriage, but a new way of life.
Only when both sides can truly understand each other's situation and tolerate each other's differences, can we find a solution that has the best of both worlds. I am determined that my parents will understand my thoughts, and at the same time, I will listen to their opinions with an open mind and reach a consensus based on mutual understanding.
At this point, I paused and looked my parents seriously into the eyes. They also stared at me with a focused gaze, as if pondering my words.
"Xiao Li, you have a point. After a long time, Dad finally spoke slowly, "Although our original approach was well-intentioned, it was indeed too blunt and simplistic. "
"Yes, we should respect your ideas and values as an individual. Mom nodded, and her tone became much softer, "As long as you can take your due responsibility for your life, we will fully support you." "
Seeing that my parents had finally let go of their prejudices made me feel a wave of warmth in my heart. I know that our differences are finally being resolved.
"Thank you for your understanding. I said sincerely, "I've been looking for someone worth entrusting my life, but I just haven't met it yet." Do you trust my judgment?"
"Of course we believe you. "But you also have to take responsibility for your choices, don't let us down." "
"Don't worry, I'll think twice. I smiled and said, "But don't rush it, give me some time and space, okay?"
"Good, good, we all respect your ideas. Mom nodded again and again, and her expression finally became a little lighter.
And just like that, our differences were finally resolved. My parents began to really respect my independent personality, and I understood their good intentions better. We came to an understanding and understanding agreement that the marriage would be entirely up to me.
This communication made me deeply realize that understanding and tolerance are the key to solving the contradiction of the generation gap. Only when we can truly think from each other's perspective and feel each other's situation with empathy can we reach true understanding and understanding with each other. This applies not only to parent-child relationships, but also to the way we relate to each other.
"So, Xiao Li, when do you plan to start your marriage and love career?" Dad asked jokingly.
"Okay, okay, just come at your pace. Mom said expectantly.
After this disagreement, I have a new vision for my future life. I will go at my own pace and in my own way to find the person I want, without being bound by any factors. At the same time, I will cherish the bond with my parents and try to understand their situation and thoughts.
I realized that although marriage is a personal matter, it is also about the happiness of the whole family. So when making this big decision, I had to pay attention not only to my personal preferences, but also to the feelings of my family. I will approach this with a more open and inclusive mind, respecting different lifestyles and values.
This experience has taught me that understanding and tolerance are the keys to resolving any conflict. Only when both parties can truly think from the other's perspective and feel each other's situation with empathy can true understanding and reconciliation be reached. This applies not only to family affection, but also to the way we relate to each other.
"Kid, you seem to be in a good mood. Mom said gently.
I nodded, opened my arms to them, and sincerely hugged my two loved ones. My parents were shocked by my action, then smiled heartily and hugged me hard.
In this way, the three of us embraced each other and resolved the estrangement and disagreement between each other. The living room was filled with a peaceful atmosphere for a while, filled with an indescribable warmth and happiness. In the arms of my parents, I regained my cherishing and affection for my family.
I know that no matter what path I take in life, whether I get married or not, my parents will always support and understand me unconditionally. In the same way, I will repay their expectations and care, and interpret the filial piety and responsibility of my children with my actions.
Let's use a tolerant and understanding mindset to face all kinds of life together. I believe that as long as the emotional bond between us is never broken, any differences and contradictions will eventually be broken.