Holding a baby or lying flat? The "tangled" award on the road to parenting
The sunlight slanted on the window lattice, casting a dappled light and shadow. That day, I happily stepped into my girlfriend's nest, and as soon as I entered the door, I saw her doting on her three-month-old baby. The little one was sleeping soundly in her arms, and her little pink face was full of satisfaction and happiness.
At this time, my best friend's mother-in-law poked her head out of the kitchen and opened her "parenting book". She walked over, shook her head and said, "Xiaoli, you hold the child all day long, he won't be a 'sticky spirit' in the future?" The mother-in-law's words were like a small pebble, stirring up a thousand waves in the hearts of her best friends.
When my mother-in-law walked into the kitchen, my best friend whispered to me: "You say, does what my mother-in-law said make sense? I always hold the child, will it really be bad for him? I also want him to lie down more, but every time I pick it up, I am reluctant to put it down." ”
I deeply understand my girlfriend's feelings. As a new mother, she is full of love and concern for her child's every move. Holding the child has become the most intimate bond between her and the child, but at the same time, she is also worried that this intimacy will affect the child's growth.
Actually, I think that holding a child is really like a "tangled prize" on the road to parenting. Love is sweet, and responsibility is heavy. When we hold the child tightly in our arms, the intimacy of blood connection is simply heart-wrenching. But at the same time, we also know that children need to be independent and learn to face the world on their own.
So, hold the child or let the child lie down? This is a multiple-choice question, it is obviously a difficult problem that needs to be thought about and balanced!
Then again, holding a child is really not a bad thing. It is a special kind of "sweet burden" in the parenting process. When we hold our child in our arms, the warmth and intimacy is simply indescribable. It not only strengthens the bond between parents and children, but also makes children feel a sense of security. This sense of security is essential for a child's growth and mental health.
However, this does not mean that we have to hold our children all the time. Children need space and freedom to grow, and over-attachment can limit their range of activities and developmental opportunities. If children are always held in our arms, they may become too dependent and passive, losing the courage and curiosity to explore the world. Therefore, while giving enough care to our children, we must also learn to let go and let them explore and grow on their own.
So, how do you balance the time spent holding your child and letting your child lie down on his own? I think it has to be flexible according to the child's age, personality and needs. Newborns spend most of their time sleeping, so we can let them rest in comfortable cots, and when they are awake, we can give them a proper hug and play with them. As children grow older and more mobile and curious, we should gradually reduce the amount of time we spend holding and encourage them to play, explore and learn on their own.
The correct posture not only makes the child feel comfortable and safe, but also avoids unnecessary damage to their body. We need to learn to hold our children in the right posture so that they can feel our love and support, and at the same time, we should also avoid holding our children in the same position for a long time, so as not to have back pain.
In the process of parenting, we should not only pay attention to the physical health and growth and development of children, but also pay attention to their mental health and emotional needs. Holding a child is not only a kind of physical contact and care, but also an emotional communication and companionship. It allows children to feel the love and warmth of their parents, thus establishing a deep parent-child relationship. And this parent-child relationship will be one of the most valuable assets in the child's growth process.
Of course, we can't ignore the problems that can be caused by over-clinging. Over-reliance on parental arms can cause children to lose their independence and autonomy, affecting their self-growth and development. Therefore, while enjoying the sweet time of holding a child, we must also learn to guide the child to gradually adapt to his ability to live independently. We can use games and activities to guide children to play on their own, explore their surroundings on their own, and give them a warm hug when they need to rest. This will not only meet the needs of the child, but also avoid the problems caused by over-holding.
In short, there is really no fixed answer to the question of holding a child or letting a child lie down. It depends on the child's age, physical condition, personality traits, and the needs and expectations of the parents. We should flexibly adjust the time and way of holding children according to their actual situation and their own feelings, so that children can thrive in a healthy, happy and safe environment.
Here, I also want to say a few heart-wrenching words to my girlfriends. Although the road of parenting is full of unknowns and challenges, as long as we love, accompany and guide with our hearts, we will definitely be able to reap full happiness and a sense of achievement. Holding the child or letting the child lie down is not a difficult question, but an open question that needs to be answered with our hearts. Let's cherish every moment with our children and write our own parenting chapter with love and wisdom!
As for the mother-in-law's worries, I would like to say that every era has its own concept of parenting. Perhaps in our opinion, holding a child will not have much impact on the child, but in the eyes of the mother-in-law's generation, excessive holding may indeed be seen as a kind of doting. This difference in concept is also normal, after all, we and my mother-in-law grew up in different environments and backgrounds. It's important that we keep an open mind, respect each other's perspectives, and work to find a parenting style that works for us and our children. In this way, we can work together to create a harmonious and happy family environment for the growth of children!