My name is Li Xuemei, I am 35 years old this year, and I am an ordinary white-collar worker in the workplace. I have a husband and an 8-year-old son, Xiao Ming. Our family of three lives an ordinary and happy life.
My husband and I work in a small company in the county. Although the income is not high, it is enough to support the living expenses of a family of three. Xiao Ming attended a nearby elementary school with middle and high grades. We rented a small apartment with two bedrooms, which was in shabby condition but cosy and comfortable.
My mother-in-law is getting old and getting worse. My brother-in-law's family of four, in addition to his own part-time work in the city, his wife and two children have been living in the countryside of his hometown. My mother-in-law's greatest wish is to be reunited with my uncle's family and take good care of them.
One day, when the family was gathering, my mother-in-law suddenly said, "Xuemei, my greatest wish is to be able to live together with your uncle's family." You see, their life in the countryside is too hard, your uncle can only work in the city, and the children are not well educated. Why don't you let them move in with us?"
"But, mother-in-law, our house is too small now, how can we accommodate six people?" I said with some embarrassment.
"It's okay, we can rent a bigger house. The mother-in-law said, "You two can share the rent." "
I'm actually very tangled in my heart. On the one hand, I understand my mother-in-law's thoughts, after all, she is old, and her biggest wish is to reunite with the whole family. But on the other hand, I also know very well that if my uncle's family really moved in with us, the quality of life would definitely be greatly reduced.
My mother-in-law looked at me expectantly, her eyes full of longing. I looked at her old face, and then at my husband, who shrugged his shoulders and seemed undecided.
Although I was very entangled in my heart, I still spoke up against my mother-in-law's suggestion: "Mother-in-law, I know that you have good intentions, but if my uncle's family of four all moves in with us, our quality of life will definitely be greatly reduced." "
"But Xuemei, you shouldn't be so selfish. The mother-in-law was a little angry and said, "Your uncle is so difficult for them, you should reach out to help them." "
"Of course I'm willing to help them, but it's too reluctant to let them move in with us, right?" I tried to explain.
I can understand my mother-in-law's feelings, but she didn't take into account our family's feelings at all. If we really let my uncle's family of four move in, our living space will suddenly become smaller, and there will be little private space left. More importantly, the living habits and educational philosophies of the two families are too different, and if they live together, conflicts will inevitably ensue.
The mother-in-law frowned, her face full of dissatisfaction. I looked at her, then at my thoughtful husband, and finally sighed. This matter seems to be difficult to solve in the short term.
"Mother-in-law, I understand your feelings, but it's a bit reluctant to let my uncle's family of four move in with us. I went on to explain, "Our living space is already cramped now, and with four more people, it's even more cramped. Moreover, the living habits and educational concepts of the two families are also very different, and if they live together, conflicts will inevitably ensue. "
"Oh, you're just too selfish!" The mother-in-law said angrily, "Your uncle is so difficult for them, you still have to refuse them? Have you forgotten who helped your family a lot when you first came to the city?"
"What's not going on, you're just not willing to help them!" My mother-in-law interrupted me, her face gloomy.
I looked at my mother-in-law's angry expression, and I was very helpless. Of course I understand her feelings, but she doesn't take into account the feelings and pressures of our family. You know, the income of our family of three is barely enough to maintain the current standard of living, and if there are four more people, our quality of life will definitely decline. What's more, the living styles of the two families are too different, and conflicts can easily arise.
The mother-in-law covered her forehead, looking very irritable. I looked at her and felt like I had nothing to say. At this moment, her husband, who had not spoken, finally spoke: "Mom, I understand what you said, but Xuemei also has her difficulties. However, maybe we can let the uncle and his family live for a while for a while, and then we can rent another house after they settle down in the city again. "
Hearing her husband's words, the anger on her mother-in-law's face gradually dissipated, and was replaced by a trace of anticipation.
"That's great!" The mother-in-law said excitedly, "Let's do it, let them live with us temporarily, and then rent another house when they have a stable job and income in the future." "
"Don't object any more, Xuemei. The mother-in-law looked at me seriously, "You should think twice, your uncle is really difficult now, we should do our best to help them." "
I looked at my mother-in-law's determined eyes, and my heart was full of mixed feelings. Of course, I would like to be able to help my uncle's family, but I am more worried that once they do move in with us, our quality of life will be greatly reduced, and the conflict between the two families will become more and more serious. However, looking at my mother-in-law's stubborn appearance, I also knew that she was determined to do this.
I looked at my mother-in-law, then at my husband, who was embarrassed, and finally sighed. It seems that this matter has been forced to settle by my mother-in-law, and we have no choice but to do this for the time being.
"All right, mother-in-law. "Since you've decided so, I have no reason to object. However, I hope that when the uncle's family has a stable income in the future, they will still have to rent another house to live in. "
"That's nature. The mother-in-law nodded, a smile returning to her face, "I don't want them to live with us forever, and then the quality of life of your family will also be affected." But for now, let them stay for a while. "
"Well, that's it. I said.
Even though I reluctantly agreed, my heart was still full of worry. I clearly know that when two families live together, conflicts will arise sooner or later. And once the contradiction arises, it will bring great pressure and trouble to our lives. However, looking at my mother-in-law's happy expression, I couldn't say anything more.
I looked at my mother-in-law's expectant appearance and couldn't help but sigh in my heart. At this moment, Xiao Ming also ran over and asked, "Mom, is my little uncle's family coming to live in our house?" That's great, I finally have a partner to play with!"
Looking at the child's innocent smile, my mood also eased a little. Perhaps, things won't be as bad as I thought they would, maybe everything will be fine.
In this way, after some preparations, my uncle's family finally moved in and lived in our small two-bedroom apartment.
In the beginning, everyone had good expectations and were more humble and courteous to each other. However, it didn't take long for the conflicts between the two families to slowly emerge.
"Xuemei, why is your Xiao Ming so naughty? Xiao Li, the uncle's wife, complained dissatisfied.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I hurriedly responded, "Xiao Ming, he is just too lively, I have already educated him several times." "
"But you can't take care of him, and if we continue like this, he's going to destroy our things!" Xiao Li's tone became a little sharp.
I looked at Xiao Li's angry expression, and I was quite helpless in my heart. Of course, I also know that Xiao Ming's behavior is indeed a bit excessive, but Xiao Li seems to have no empathy at all, and he can't understand my difficulties as a mother at all. You know, I not only have to go to work every day, but also take care of housework, how can I have so much energy to keep an eye on Xiao Ming all the time? What's more, Xiao Li's own two children are not very well-behaved.
In this way, the contradictions between the two families became more and more, and finally after a fierce quarrel, they broke out completely.
"Enough, I can't take it anymore!" Xiao Li yelled at me angrily, "Your Xiao Ming is a complete naughty bag, he makes trouble every day and makes a mess of our family's things!
"You're going too far!" I was also completely annoyed, "Are your two children so well-behaved? They trampled on our table again today, look what good things they have done!"
"Then it's to blame you for not taking good care of them! Besides, we are guests, and you should be more considerate of us!" Xiao Li said confidently.
I was trembling with anger and felt that Xiao Li's words were too much. We have tried our best to take care of and tolerate their family, but they have no empathy at all and completely neglect our host family. What's even more infuriating is that Xiao Li even asked us to be considerate of them, which is really too much!
After that heated argument, I began to reflect on whether we should really let my uncle's family continue to live with us.
"Husband, should we really let Uncle and them continue to live here?" One day, I finally said to my husband, "I know my mother-in-law has good intentions, but when you look at our life now, it's like hell." "
"I don't think it's good for us to live like this. The husband sighed and looked embarrassed, "But how are we going to talk to our mother?"
"I think we have to be more resolute. I made up my mind, "Otherwise, our family's quality of life will only deteriorate day by day." "
After much deliberation, I finally made up my mind. Although I knew that this decision would hurt my mother-in-law's heart, we really didn't have a better choice. I don't want Xiao Ming's growth to be affected too much, and I don't want my relationship with my husband to crack due to the pressure of life. We have tried our best to tolerate and understand my uncle's family, but they have no empathy at all.
I looked at my husband's worried look and reached out and patted him on the shoulder, signaling him not to worry too much. Although it was a difficult decision, I was ready to go to a showdown with my mother-in-law. At this moment, my mother-in-law happened to come over, and when she saw our expressions, she asked, "What's wrong with you two? Is something happening?"
After some difficult communication, my husband and I finally persuaded my mother-in-law to let my uncle's family rent another house.
"Mom, I know you're well-intentioned, but you should also consider how our family feels. In the showdown with my mother-in-law, I said, "Two families live together, and there are too many contradictions. We have tried our best to be tolerant and understanding of them, but they have no empathy at all. "
"Mom, Xuemei makes a lot of sense. At this moment, the husband also spoke, "Our quality of life is really poor now, and if this continues, I am afraid that the conflict between us will only get bigger and bigger." You don't want to see us noisy, do you?"
The process of convincing her mother-in-law was extremely difficult, as she had always had the hope of a good family reunion. But the reality is far more cruel than she imagined, two families live together, there are too many contradictions and conflicts. I had to make this difficult decision in order to preserve the quality of life for my family.