As the saying goes, "adversity sees truth". A person's true pattern and realm are often slowly tempered after experiencing various difficulties and twists and turns. If you haven't experienced any major grievances and tribulations, a person's pattern can't be supported. Therefore, a person's pattern is supported by grievances.
01 Grievances stretch out patience
Some people have been spoiled since they were young and have never suffered any losses, so the whole person is very willful, and they can't stand it when they encounter a little setback. Grievances are often such "small setbacks", but if they are experienced and digested well, patience will be exercised and improved.
I have a friend who didn't grow up in a wealthy family. Although his parents loved him, due to lack of money, many things could not be done exactly as he wanted. This made him feel aggrieved from time to time, but gradually, he slowly learned to be patient and wait.
When he grew up, he seemed to be more patient and determined than others. Even in the face of great difficulties, he was always able to calm down and persevere unwaveringly. This is the precious quality he has cultivated through repeated grievances.
02 Grievances open up empathy
Those who have been fed and clothed since childhood can easily turn a blind eye to the plight of others. Because they have never experienced what it is like to be trampled on by life, they cannot truly understand and empathize with the suffering of others.
But the same is true for those whose lives have been through hardships. They know how to empathize, to empathize with others. Because on the previous life path, they had been ravaged by life, and they had also tasted all kinds of grievances and pains.
It is those ups and downs that give them an incredibly powerful exercise in empathy, making them more compassionate and empathetic. Therefore, a person's empathy is also supported by grievances.
03 Grievances open up insight
The onlooker can often only see the surface of things, while the person in question can see the essence of things. If a person has never experienced many hardships, his vision and opinions will naturally be superficial. Only by experiencing the hardships of life can he slowly improve his ability to perceive things.
I know a person who suffered a lot of grievances and setbacks because of the twists and turns in his career when he just graduated. But it was those tribulations that made him finally realize that relying on others alone would not work, and that he had to face life bravely and overcome it on his own.
Since then, his insight has been increasing day by day. When encountering any difficulties, he can always see through the essence of things, prescribe the right medicine, and finally overcome all difficulties. This is the valuable insight he has cultivated through his own experience of suffering and grievances.
04 The grievances opened up the mind
Those who have had no worries about food and clothing since childhood often have a narrow vision, and are easy to worry about small things, and they are concerned with people everywhere. Those who have experienced suffering will be different, and their hearts will become more open and broader.
I have a relative who was very poor when he was young. Due to his poor family background, he has suffered countless losses and suffered countless grievances. But it was these grievances that made his mind invisibly stretch wide.
Later, he was talented and made a fortune. But even so, he can still have an extraordinary degree of tolerance for people and things. No matter how big the twists and turns, no matter how many gains and losses, it is not worth it in his eyes.
This is his open-mindedness and generosity through his own difficult experience and his grievances. If he has been free of food and clothing since he was a child, how can he be so open-minded?
05 Grievances have opened up the pattern
How big a person's pattern is depends not on how high his education and status are, but on how great the hardships he has experienced in life. Only after going through many hardships and enduring all kinds of hardships will his pattern be slowly stretched.
People who have lived the life of rich and noble families since childhood, and those who are pampered will naturally be limited. Because they have never truly experienced the hardships and injustices of life, their horizons will naturally be narrow.
And those who have struggled in hardship are different. They have personally experienced the ups and downs of life, understood all kinds of impermanence in the world, and thus were able to let go and see openly, thus cultivating a broad pattern and mind.
Therefore, a person's pattern is really slowly stretched out in the midst of grievances again and again. Only when you have experienced enough and endured all kinds of hardships will your pattern increase day by day and continue to expand.
Life is like this, if anyone has smooth sailing and has never tasted bitterness, his pattern will always be confined to a narrow range. Only when the hardships and grievances hit us can we continue to grow, and can we finally cast a broad mind and an extraordinary pattern.
Therefore, do not regard those tribulations and grievances as beasts of prey, they are the important force that promotes our growth and makes our pattern continue to expand. We should face them bravely and meet the various opportunities of life with an optimistic attitude, only in this way can we continue to sublimate in the suffering again and again, and finally achieve a broad pattern and lofty ideals and ambitions.