After middle age, the most cost-effective way to maintain health

In life, we will be haunted by what we can't get, and we will be repeatedly entangled with what we can't figure out, and we will also be blindly struggling for what we can't see through, and we will regret that we can't let go.

As everyone knows, troubles and desires have become the biggest stumbling block to health.

When people reach middle age, instead of letting themselves be sad, it is better to let go of the burden in their hearts.

Not looking up, not caring, not being angry, and not obsessing is the most cost-effective way to maintain health.

-01-

Don't look up to the happiness of others

Woolf, the British modernist writer, said, "You don't have to be in a hurry, you don't have to be radiant, you don't have to be someone else, you just have to be yourself." ”

If you fix your eyes on others, you are destined to lose your own color.

Lu Xiaoxi in the micro-film "Mortal" is a white-collar worker working hard in Shanghai.

Every day, I am in a state of disgrace shuttling through piles of express deliveries and stacks of documents.

Life is stretched thin, and I can't even afford to buy a pair of heels.

On the other hand, Ni Na, a roommate in a shared room, is a small actor, not only fashionable and beautiful, with a decent job, but also earns a lot of money.

The wardrobe is full of her coveted dresses, and the shoe closet lies the high heels she craves.

Ni Na's fashion and sophistication make the conformist Xiaoxi envious.

So, she began to clumsily emulate Ni Na, fantasizing that she could also live a high-class and decent life.

It wasn't until one day that Ni Na hurriedly went out and dropped her mobile phone, and Xiaoxi sent her to the set, and she saw the unknown side behind Ni Na.

In the cold winter, Ni Na was thinly dressed and filming a scene.

She stood barefoot on the cold, muddy ground, falling, getting up, and falling again and again.

In the director's impatient rebuke, she stood with her head bowed and helpless like a child who had done something wrong.

At this time, Xiaoxi suddenly understood that there was the same helplessness behind the glamour she envied.

The writer Fyodor Dostoevsky said: "Man is unhappy because he does not know that he is happy, nothing more." ”

Seeing others going well, I feel that my future is bleak;

When I hear that others are at ease, I feel that I am troubled.

As everyone knows, behind other people's scenery, there is also unbearable suffering.

Instead of looking up to the happiness of others in the midst of troubles, it is better to lower your head and live your own life.

There are no weeds in your heart, so you can see the flowers all over the road.

If you look down on everything, your mood will suddenly brighten, and good luck will follow.

-02-

The voice that is not in the unexpected world

Yang Jiang's translation of Don Quixote is widely regarded as the finest translation work.

However, this translation was controversial at the time.

In an interview, translator Dong Yansheng not only criticized Yang Jiang's translation for making translation errors, but also accused Yang Jiang of deleting chapters, and even called Yang Jiang's translation a negative textbook.

His comments have sparked concern from all walks of life.

But Yang Jiang turned a deaf ear and did what he had to do without distraction.

A friend called her to find out.

But she quipped: "Why are you still as nosy as a hairy boy!" I am not angry at that kind of criticism, and I don't want to pay attention to him, let him say whatever he wants. ”

Later, people found out that Yang Jiang used the "point annoying" translation method.

Although more than 100,000 words have been dropped in the "point", the grammar is more prominent and the plot is more compact.

In the face of malicious criticism and unwarranted slander from others, we often lose our minds.

Rushing to explain, but not getting approval, and constantly justifying, but falling into the trap of self-proof.

Writer Dale Carnegie said, "There is only one way to win an argument, and that is to avoid it." ”

In life, everyone will inevitably be maliciously slandered, and if you respond to everything and defend everything, it will only increase your troubles.

Teacher Luo Xiang said: "Misunderstanding is the normal state of life, and understanding is a scarce exception." ”

Pursuing the approval of those around you excessively will only lead to self-doubt and resentment.

Only by establishing a good wall with the outside world and cultivating top-level shielding power can you be a controller of your emotions.

Turn on the energy-saving mode, and you can ignore everything and take care of everything.

-03-

Not afraid of the breakdown of the relationship

Mo Yan said: "Don't be afraid of the breakdown of the relationship, because the breakdown is part of growing up. ”

Caring too much about a relationship and bothering to please everywhere will only make others gain an inch.

Maintaining a moderate level of indifference is the best attitude towards the world.

I've seen a story before.

Lao Lin attended the class reunion and added WeChat to each other with many old classmates.

After that, Lao Lin was "entangled" by a female classmate.

At first, the female classmate just asked Lao Lin to help her like it in the circle of friends, and help her participate in some activities where she could receive discounts or gifts by collecting likes.

Because it's not a big deal, Lao Lin also thinks that it is rare to get in touch with old friends, and he doesn't want to destroy them easily, so he helps every time.

Who knows that the requests of female classmates are becoming more and more frequent, and they are becoming more and more troublesome, sometimes they ask for likes, sometimes they ask for retweets, and some need to register information on some websites where the source is not clear.

Lao Lin, who was worried about the leakage of information, began to shirk a little busy, and then the other party still bothered him repeatedly, so Lao Lin set up a "close message reminder" on the female classmate's WeChat.

Within a few days, the female classmate posted an article asking Lao Lin to read it, mocking Lao Lin for being indifferent, and he didn't even want to help, so Lao Lin didn't pay attention to her.

Psychologist Adler said, "Living in fear of relationship breakdown is an unfree way of life to live for others." ”

Only by allowing relationships to break down can we protect our boundaries.

We've all been there:

In the face of his friend's deception and use, he was disgusted, but he only warned himself that his love was priceless;

In the face of other people's gains, I am dissatisfied, and I only comfort myself that it is a blessing to suffer losses.

But I don't know that not all relationships are worth maintaining, and not all people are worth backing down.

The right relationship should be guarded with care, and the unsuitable relationship should be stopped in time.

It is better to let go with dignity than to hold on with tears, and it is better to stay away quietly than to persist in a gloomy and sad spirit.

Don't please others, only cultivate yourself, is the king of life.

-04-

Don't care about past gains and losses

Ernest Hemingway once said, "As long as you don't care about gains and losses, there is nothing in life that cannot be overcome." ”

Gains and losses are like a cage, and dwelling on them will only punish oneself, and a smile is the best reward.

An actor once had such an experience:

He won the favor of the crew director with his solid acting skills and invited him to play the role of the second male lead.

Hearing the news, he was excited, but more hesitant.

It turned out that he was rehearsing his graduation play at that time, which was related to whether he could go to the theater of his choice.

And because the crew has more male number two scenes, the actors must be in the crew for a long time.

On the one hand, it is the job that I want after graduation, and on the other hand, it is a rare opportunity to act.

After much struggle, he reluctantly refused the director's invitation.

Later, this drama was broadcast, and it became popular to the point that thousands of people were empty, and he missed this opportunity to become popular.

After that, although he was recognized by the audience for other roles, many people felt that he had missed the best bonus period.

In an interview, the host asked him if he regretted his choice back then.

He said that he was not wrong, acting is just his job, and he doesn't want to treat acting as the only main theme of life.

Instead of filming non-stop, he will choose half the time to film and half the time to enjoy life.

On the road of life, gains and losses always go hand in hand, and too much consideration will only make people resentful.

There is a saying: "Every time you look back, you are slowly dragging down the present, and every step you take forward is slowly approaching happiness." ”

In this life, we will go through countless forks in the road, and no matter how we choose, we will inevitably have regrets.

Dwelling too much on the past will only wear down one's patience and make people stop.

Regardless of whether the past is glorious or regretful, we must learn to clear it at any time.

If you don't cling to the past, you will meet surprises unexpectedly.

-05-

In Walden, it is written: The more things a person can put down, the richer he becomes.

Learning to let go is the best way to cure everything, and it is also the most cost-effective way to maintain health.

Letting go of desires and being content with each other will dispel the anxiety in your heart;

Let go of justification, do not argue with others, and live a natural and peaceful life;

Let go of flattery, have the courage to be hated, and then calmly face the gathering and dispersion;

Let go of gains and losses, and not be driven by fame and fortune, so that you have the confidence to restart your life.

For the rest of your life, you might as well let go of the obstacles in your heart, nourish your heart with contentment, and maintain your health with indifference.

About the author: Smile in the palm of your hand, accompany reading, and integrate writing into life.