Text/Ye Feifei YFF
Figure/From the Internet
Whether there is pure friendship between the opposite sex has always been a controversial topic.
Many people believe that there is also pure friendship between people of the opposite sex, and as long as both parties do not cross the line and communicate sincerely, they can gain true friendship.
However, there are also many people who feel that it is difficult to have pure friendship between the opposite sex, and the two sides are tired of being together for a long time, and there are more emotional involvement and interaction, and they are a little careless and cross the line.
Many times, heterosexual relationships are often accompanied by complex emotional entanglements and subtle psychological changes.
Although the existence of pure friendship between the opposite sex cannot be completely denied, it must also be admitted that such pure friendship is relatively rare, and in most cases, ambiguous relationships may occur.
So, do friends of the opposite sex have pure friendship? Very rarely, basically in the following three situations.
1. Play ambiguity with friendship and covet freshness
This is especially common among young people.
They may come together because they are lonely, curious, or thrill-seeking, and approach each other as friends, but they exude an ambiguous atmosphere in their words and deeds.
They don't really want to develop a deep relationship, but they enjoy the novelty and excitement of this ambiguous relationship.
This ambiguous friendship is often based on a kind of mutual testing and speculation, and both sides are careful to maintain this delicate balance.
When dating, both parties do not want to express their love clearly and do not want to lose the attention of the other person.
However, this kind of relationship is often difficult to sustain for long, and when the novelty wears off, or when one of the partners develops a genuine affection, the friendship is on the verge of collapse.
Just like a couple of men and women around them, they are college classmates, and the two come together because of their common interests and hobbies, and they become friends who talk about everything.
However, with frequent interactions, their relationship gradually became ambiguous.
Girls often send messages to men late at night to share their thoughts, and men will also send some small gifts to girls from time to time, or send a small red envelope to create some small surprises.
Both people enjoy the novelty of this ambiguous relationship, but they never express each other's hearts clearly.
It wasn't until one day, when both parties met someone they really liked, that they realized that the relationship was not real love, but just a short-lived infatuation.
As a result, both of them were very entangled, and eventually fell into embarrassment and distress, and the relationship was indifferent.
Therefore, between the opposite sex, once they covet novelty and pleasure and play ambiguous with friendship, it will eventually bring trouble and pain, and the gains outweigh the losses.
2. In the name of friends, develop a lover relationship
Some men and women approach the opposite sex as friends at the beginning, but in fact have the purpose of developing a lover relationship.
They may have taken a fancy to certain qualities of the other person, or they may feel that the other person is a potential love partner, so they pursue them as friends.
In the process, they will deliberately show care and consideration in an attempt to win the favor of the other person.
They may support each other at work and care for each other in life, but they always maintain a sense of distance.
This seemingly stable relationship is full of uncertainties, and if one of the partners has a better choice or the relationship changes, the relationship can immediately become precarious.
Just like Mr. Wang and Miss Zhao, they are partners at work, and the two have frequent contact because of their work relationship, and gradually develop feelings.
For various reasons, they did not make their relationship public, but continued to get along as friends.
Mr. Wang often asks Ms. Zhao to eat and watch movies together after work, and Ms. Zhao will also give Mr. Wang a lot of help and support at work.
Both of them knew each other's feelings, but they didn't have the courage to take that step, until one day, Miss Zhao met someone who was really suitable for her, and she decided to end this uncertain relationship.
However, when the relationship ended, the two parties had a particularly unpleasant quarrel, not only a quarrel, but also a complete breakdown of the friendship.
In fact, this kind of behavior of selling people in the name of friends often brings harm to both parties.
When the truth is revealed, the pursued party may feel deceived and betrayed, while the suitor may also feel disappointed and frustrated because they are unable to achieve their goals.
3. Regard yourself as male and female girlfriends and seek emotional comfort
This situation is more common in long-term friendships.
In modern society, the friendship between men and women is gradually accepted and recognized by more people, and some people will choose to maintain a close friendship relationship with the opposite sex as male and female girlfriends.
In a relationship, men and women may become good friends because of their similar personalities and interests, and they play an important role in each other's lives, sharing joys and sorrows with each other.
When one partner encounters a setback or dilemma, the other partner will not hesitate to lend a helping hand and give emotional support and comfort.
The relationship may seem pure, but as the relationship deepens, one of the partners may gradually develop emotional needs that go beyond the friendship.
They will start to expect more attention and companionship, and even hope to develop a deeper relationship with each other.
However, since both parties have become accustomed to the existing model of friendship, it is difficult to take that step.
This happens often because both partners are unaware of the boundaries between friendship and love, or are afraid of the unpredictable risks associated with changing an existing relationship.
Ye Feifei YFF emotional message:
To sum up, it is difficult to maintain true pure friendship between people of the opposite sex, most of which are the following three situations:
Playing ambiguous with friendship, greedy for novelty, developing lover relationships in the name of friends, and seeking emotional comfort by pretending to be male and female girlfriends.
So, is there really no such thing as pure friendship between people of the opposite sex?
In fact, pure friendship is entirely possible as long as both parties can maintain enough honesty and respect, clearly define the relationship with each other, and do not carry any ambiguity or emotional expectations.
This friendship, based on mutual understanding, support and trust, can bring spiritual comfort and growth to both parties.
It requires both men and women to be mature and self-controlled, and to be able to properly handle possible emotional swings and misunderstandings.
At the same time, both parties are able to respect each other's choices and decisions, and will not interfere in each other's lives because of their own emotional needs.
Therefore, heterosexual friendship cannot simply be regarded as a relationship that is not pure or purposeful, and needs to be judged according to the actual situation.
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Author: Ye Feifei YFF, focusing on the creation and sharing of the emotional field, I hope to use warm words to bring you some spiritual comfort. I hope you and I know each other here, please follow me if you like!