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There are always some things in life that cannot be managed, and if you manage them well, it will be a blessing;
When encountering this kind of thing, you must think clearly, and don't just take care of it.
There are many mistakes in management, and if you are not very sure, it is better to ignore them.
For smart people, there are two things that are the least careful, do you know which two things are?
1. Regardless of the family's household affairs
Usually everyone has the habit of drinking tea and chatting with others, and when chatting, try not to inquire into the privacy of other people's homes, such as not asking about his housework.
If he takes the initiative to talk about himself, that's another matter, but if you ask for an opinion, be cautious.
As the saying goes, it is difficult for a clean official to judge housework, not to mention us, we are not good at evaluating other people's housework, so try not to take care of other people's housework.
I have a friend who has a good relationship, and he once said that he hates nosy aunts in the countryside the most, which will make very simple things complicated, and will also make things that he wants to hide known to everyone.
My friend Nan Nan gave birth a while ago, and her mother had no time to take care of herself, so she could only go to her mother-in-law's house for confinement, but in this short month, the family has never given birth to a child.
Originally, Nan Nan was a girl with a gentle personality, but in the mouths of the seven aunts and eight aunts in the village, she was a rude and willful daughter-in-law, which made Nan Nan very depressed.
The reason why there are such rumors is because Aunt Nan Nan said bad things about Nan Nan to her neighbors.
One day, the eldest aunt came to the house as a guest, Nan Nan was breastfeeding the child, and she never thought that the child was peeing while feeding, and the diaper pad was wet.
So Nan Nan called her husband to come in and clean up, and asked him to quickly wash the wet diaper pad.
But the eldest aunt heard this, so she said to Nan Nan's mother-in-law, your son is tired enough to go to work, and he has to wash the child's diapers after work, and your daughter-in-law is really embarrassed to command.
In the eyes of the eldest aunt and mother-in-law, men should not dry diaper cleaning, and men's hands are used to earn money, not to do housework.
Nan Nan knows that there is a generation gap between herself and her mother-in-law and aunt, and understands that the ideas of their older generation are all male superiority and female inferiority.
Although Nan Nan was very unhappy when she heard this, she could only ignore it because of the face of her relatives.
Later, it was time to eat at noon, Nan Nan asked her husband to watch the children, and she went to eat first, and her husband was happy to go to the bedroom to see the baby.
However, the eldest aunt was unhappy again, and said in a weird way, Nan Nan's life is really good, I think it was your eldest uncle who ate first, and I was watching the child.
The voiceover made Nan Nan unbearable, and angrily scolded the eldest aunt, the eldest uncle didn't show you the child, that is, he didn't know how to feel sorry for you, if you envy my good life, then go back and let the eldest uncle do a little more work, don't talk about things here.
The eldest aunt knew that she was wrong, so she could only shut up.
Nan Nan's mother-in-law knows that it is not easy for her daughter-in-law to give birth to a child, and she is now in confinement and needs to take good care of her, otherwise she will fall ill, but it will be a lifelong thing.
Nan Nan's mother-in-law was very unhappy when she saw her aunt say Nan Nan, and advised her aunt that what the children do is their business, and we can't care about it, and we don't bother to care.
In Nan Nan's mother-in-law's view, meddling in the children's housework will not make their feelings intimate, but will have the opposite effect.
If you don't want to be disliked, don't worry about others, it's good to be able to manage your own affairs.
Smart people don't bother with other people's housework, and they know that housework is difficult to judge because it involves all kinds of complex feelings.
Even if it is a simple matter, if it involves feelings, it will become complicated, and the parties concerned will not be able to figure it out, let alone outsiders.
In addition to the parties involved, the housework is an outsider, even if it is his parents, it is impossible to handle his housework well, let alone other relatives.
Every family has a scripture that is difficult to read, and the situation of each family is different, so it is best for people to focus on their own family and not to get involved in other people's housework.
I remember when I was a child, my brother and I were very close, often sleeping on a quilt and eating a snack, which was like a conjoined baby, and I was reluctant to part for a moment.
At that time, my brother often said that when I grow up, I must protect me, and if anyone dares to bully me, even if it is my husband, he will make decisions for me.
But as I grew older, we all had our own small families, and my brother's relationship was also estranged, and we couldn't tell each other many things.
Once my husband and I had a conflict over trivial matters, and I ran to my brother's house to complain when I was angry, but my brother directly pushed me out of the house and asked me to go home and solve it by myself.
I was very dissatisfied with my brother's ignorance, and went to my mother to complain, but they, like my brother, asked me to go back and explain it to my husband myself.
When I got home, I saw that my husband was cleaning up the house, all the fires were gone, and the two of them were reconciled again.
Later, my brother said to me that we are not good at interfering in our own housework, and if we do, it is easy for my brother-in-law to think that I am on your side and stand up for you, and the family will unite to bully him alone.
If the mother's family interferes in the housework, it will make things worse and more serious.
As the saying goes, husband and wife quarrel, the head of the bed quarrels, and the end of the bed, but it is not simple for outsiders to join.
As a smart person, he knows how to deal with the sense of boundaries in the world, like husband and wife quarreling and bickering, it is commonplace, if you cross the line to manage, you can only do bad things with good intentions.
2. Regardless of friends' feelings
I am a woman, usually surrounded by female playmates, through their observations, I found that girls have one thing in common, that is, they like to judge other people's feelings.
When girls are together, they often discuss their emotional matters, such as having a quarrel with their boyfriend because of some things and wanting to seek a solution from their girlfriends.
Here's a reminder to everyone, even if you are a master of feelings, don't care about your friends' feelings, because it will affect your relationship with your friends.
Usually only stupid people will care about their friends' feelings, and really smart people only listen and don't respond, because they know what to do if the other party asks you for affection, but they don't really need your help, and they simply complain.
As the saying goes, fire prevention, theft and girlfriends, especially emotionally, should be guarded against girlfriends, don't tell your girlfriends everything, and girlfriends should also be guarded against, don't care about her feelings.
Jingjing and Taotao are college classmates, and in the second semester of their freshman year, Taotao has a love for Jingjing, who is good at studying and looks good.
But quietly focused on studying, she has no intention of falling in love, and her hometown is very far away from Taotao's hometown, even if they are together during college, they are still scorers in the graduation season.
However, since ancient times, good women have been afraid of pestering men, and under the stubborn stalking of Taotao, Jingjing finally agreed to date him.
Thinking quietly, maybe the two of them can make it to the end.
In the blink of an eye, the graduation season of his senior year is coming, and Taotao's parents arranged a very good job for him in his hometown, so Taotao has a plan to return to his hometown for employment after graduation.
Looking at Jingjing again, she is the only daughter in the family, and she plans to return to her hometown for employment after graduation, so that she can be closer to her parents.
At this time, Jingjing and Taotao's relationship is facing a huge test, and they don't know whether to break up or maintain a long-distance relationship, or whether one of them sacrifices and goes to each other's hometown.
When he couldn't make up his mind, he quietly told his best friend Mao Mao about it.
As a good friend, Mao Mao expressed her opinion on this matter, and she thought that if Tao Tao was more Jingjing, she would choose to go with Jingjing and go to Jingjing's hometown.
After listening to it quietly, I felt that what my best friend said was very reasonable, so I went to Taotao the next day to express my attitude.
Quietly said, if you love me, come with me to my hometown.
But Tao Tao thinks that it is okay to have a long-distance relationship just after graduation, and after a few years, whoever does not develop well will go to live in the other party's city.
But Jingjing thought that Taotao just didn't love himself enough, and finally the two chose to break up.
Jing Jing, who returned to her hometown, often recalled the sweet times with Tao Tao in college, and in the second month after the breakup, she decided to go to Tao Tao's hometown and find him back together.
Unexpectedly, Jing Jing saw his new girlfriend in Taotao's hometown, and she was very sad at this time, so she went back silently alone.
After coming back, I quietly asked Mao Mao to come out to drink together, vent my sadness, and quietly complain about Mao Mao after being drunk, if you didn't come up with an idea, Tao Tao and I must have obtained a marriage certificate, how could we break up.
Maomao's quiet words shocked Mao Mao very much, he was originally kind, but he ended up complaining, it was really a dog meddling with a mouse.
After this incident, Mao Mao no longer gave advice on her friends' feelings, she knew that feelings were not human, and if she didn't do it, she would not be a person inside and out.
Emotional matters are usually cut and sorted out, and the more people involved, the more complicated things will be.
Feelings are like people drinking water and knowing themselves, friends complain to you about emotional things, most of them also have her emotions in them, you are easy to be affected by her dissatisfaction, so as to make wrong judgments about emotional matters.
Even if you know the whole picture, your suggestion will have your own subjective thoughts, and if the suggestion is given, the relationship between friends is getting better and better, then everyone will be happy.
But if the suggestion is given, the friend's relationship breaks down, and maybe he will complain.
Write at the end
Smart people will live their lives well and ignore these two things.
Don't take yourself too seriously, you think that you manage others for the good of others, but in fact others don't need them, and they may even be annoying.
Only when a person falls does he know who is giving the right advice, everyone has their own path to follow, and even if the path is wrong, there will be people who will continue to walk.
Smart people don't stop him when he's gone, they don't help until the other person has already suffered.
One last word, learn to be a smart person and take care of yourself!