Their hearts are like a delicate painting, each stroke is full of affectionate colors, and every stroke depicts endless tenderness.
However, despite all their efforts, sometimes this effort is like a stone thrown into the deep sea, and it does not arouse the slightest repercussions.
Men's thinking, on the other hand, tends to be more direct and pragmatic. They focus more on the outcome of the action than on the complexity of the process.
They understand that the relationship is not a one-sided effort, but requires the joint efforts and maintenance of both parties. They understand that sometimes, over-giving can make the other person feel stressed and constrained.
Perhaps, we can try to think differently and use male thinking to talk about feelings, maybe there will be unexpected gains.
Next, let's dive into the specific use of the male mind in relationships.
The man's mind, fundamentally, seems to boil down to two patterns: animal attributes and chasing personalities.
First of all, let's talk about animal attributes, which originate from biological instincts, so that men often show a behavior pattern of "discovering, vigilant, preparing, chasing, tearing, biting" in the pursuit of career and emotion.
Imagine a tiger lying quietly in the grass, eyes fixed on an antelope, nervously preparing for the moment of lifting.
This is a typical state of a man when he is pursuing his goal, with full attention and all his might.
In stark contrast to this is the "gathering" mode of survival of women.
Imagine the women of primitive tribes, holding baskets, busily gathering food while chattering with their companions.
In this mode, women are able to stay connected to others and respond to messages while they are busy.
But for men, when they are fully engaged in the chase, like a tiger running, it is difficult for them to stop and reply to a WeChat message.
No matter how you define the emotion between you and that boyfriend who doesn't reply messages, for most men, whether it's career or emotion, it's more like a game of tiger chasing the white rabbit.
This is not to say that men don't value relationships or careers, but rather that their way of thinking and behaving makes them show a unique focus and commitment in their pursuits.
Understanding this may help us get along better with men and avoid unnecessary misunderstandings and conflicts.
You will find that those men who are in high rank, they will not open their hearts to you easily.
They are passionate and mysterious, always maintaining a certain sense of distance, and you can also learn this attitude, passionate in words, but at a distance in action.
Make him feel as if you have a crush on him and seem to have a chance to develop further, but without fully revealing his heart.
Remember, you should also master this degree when sharing your life.
For example, you have just tasted the food of a specialty restaurant, and the unique taste and pleasant experience of the meal will excite you.
You can tell him about this new discovery, describe the delicious taste of the food and the unique atmosphere of the restaurant, and make him feel your joy.
But without going into too much detail about every dish and every detail of the meal, you can leave some room for suspense and imagination to generate more curiosity about the experience you share.
At the same time, understand his busyness. Don't interrupt him too often and ask him to respond to your comments immediately.
When he says he's busy, you can thoughtfully say, "I understand you're busy, let's talk when you're free." However, that restaurant is really good, and when you have time, we can try it together. ”
Of course, you also need to express your desire for companionship.
When appropriate, tell him that you would like him to take the time to spend time with you to try the food at that specialty restaurant or do something else together.
If he can't accommodate your request because he's too busy, you can try making a next offer: "Then let's find a time to go to that restaurant together next time, I'm sure you'll like it." ”
By expressing yourself in this way, you are not only sharing your own life experience, but also showing understanding and consideration for him.
This way of communication will not only enhance the bond between you, but also make him look forward to spending quality time with you.
However, in the process of pursuing companionship, it is also necessary to learn to brake in time. If you find that his response is becoming cold or distant, don't dwell on it or ask why.
Stay sane and calm, and give yourself and him some time and space to think and adjust. If he is really interested in you, he will come back to you on his own initiative.
At the same time, be wary of men with impure intentions. They may use all sorts of means to pursue you, but they don't really care about your feelings and needs.
In this case, you need to be sensible and vigilant and not be easily carried away by their sweet words.
Observe their behavior and attitudes to see if they truly respect your wishes and choices.
If they just want to take advantage of you or satisfy their own selfish desires, then you need to decisively reject them and stay away from them.
As an example, let's say you're in the dating phase with a guy. In one chat, you shared your most recent travel experience, describing the beautiful scenery and enjoyable experience.
He showed great interest and asked you more about the trip. You can go on and on sharing some interesting stories and feelings, but it doesn't have to be too detailed.
At the same time, when he says that he can't do something with you right away because he is busy with work, you can show your understanding and make an appointment for the next time.
If he is genuinely interested in you, he will reach out to you and arrange a date at his leisure.
However, if you find out that he is only interested in your travel experience and doesn't really care about your feelings and needs as a person.
Or maybe he just wants to use your sharing to satisfy his curiosity or show off, then you need to be vigilant and put on the brakes in time.
Don't be fooled by his superficial efforts, but see his true motives and purposes.
in a word
By sharing your life, understanding busyness, expressing your feelings, putting on the brakes in time, and staying sane, you can make men want to stop you.
At the same time, we should also be wary of men with impure intentions and protect our own interests and dignity.
Students, if you also want to keep yourself in your relationship and not be trapped by feelings, then learn from men's thinking.
Your time and energy can be divided into four parts - 30% for work, 20% for your own hobbies, 20% for relationships, and 30% for parents and friends.
Of course, you can arrange the specific distribution, but the bottom line is that the share of feelings in your life must not exceed 50%. It shouldn't and can't be the most important thing in your life.
Understand that your life is there to fulfill your own worth.
Don't give up your pursuits and dreams because of your feelings, but keep growing and improving in your relationships.
Maintain your independence and self-confidence, and don't let feelings be the whole of your life.
On the road of feelings, it may be a new attempt and challenge to use male thinking to control feelings.
But as long as you master these skills and methods, you will be able to face various problems and challenges in relationships with more confidence.
Let feelings become a beautiful landscape in your life!
Remember
Using male thinking to control the way of feelings, let us maintain ourselves, maintain independence, and maintain self-confidence in our relationships.
In this way, we can reap more happiness and satisfaction in our relationship and become a real emotional winner.