Recently, a movie called "Predecessor 3" has become popular all over the country.
There are many people who are struck by a sentence in the movie: "I love you, it has nothing to do with you." ”
In the movie, Lin Jia said: "I'm tired and want to give up." ”
But Meng Yun said: "I think let's break up." ”
Does this passage sound very much like us in life?
The two obviously love each other, but they are always quarreling and finally break up.
- There will be no quarrels, there will be cold wars
Writer Lu Sihao said: "Between people, they meet by fate, and they get along with each other by tolerance. ”
When two people are together, there will always be some quarrels.
However, the purpose of a fight is not to let the other person know how bad they are, but so that two people can get to know each other better.
Sometimes quarrels are a kind of communication.
When one person speaks in an accusatory tone, the other subconsciously fights back.
Why don't you say "why can't you love me as much as I love you"?
When the contradiction between two people becomes deeper and deeper, there will be more and more nothing to say.
Silence is the best solution.
The Cold War is also one of the dumbest ways to communicate.
It is to express dissatisfaction and incomprehension of the other party in a cold tone, it is to show that it does not care about this relationship with an indifferent attitude, and it is to express its unwillingness to this relationship in the most hurtful way.
If two people don't know how to communicate and communicate, they will consume all their enthusiasm and love in the Cold War.
- If you don't know how to tolerate, you will cheat
Around us, there are many couples who end up parting ways because they don't know how to be tolerant.
For example, in marriage, men will always feel that women are too vexatious.
It's clear that I've worked hard, why do I have to get along with myself?
Women feel that men are too strong and do not know how to take care of their feelings.
Women feel that men are always not considerate enough to themselves and do not give her enough security.
If a person does not have a tolerant heart, it is easy to cheat.
Some time ago I saw a news: a girl was drinking in a bar and had sex with a guy after getting drunk.
When her boyfriend found out about it, he immediately rushed over.
And took the girl to the hotel room, where the two had a relationship.
The relationship between the two people also broke down because of this.
The most feared thing in a relationship is to blame and complain about each other.
No one wants to tolerate another person all the time, so two people must learn to tolerate each other and understand each other.
When you know each other's difficulties, you can cherish each other more, and when you know how to tolerate each other, you can make two people more affectionate.
- If you don't know how to empathize, you will break up
I once saw a sentence: "All quarrels in the world stem from incomprehension of each other." ”
I think so, because we can't think about the problem from the other side's point of view, so we will use our own way to communicate and solve the problem.
When two people are together, communication is a very important thing. And whether a person understands empathy or not is the key to happiness with him (her).
There is a netizen on Zhihu who shared the story between himself and his girlfriend.
Boys love to play games, and every time the girl goes online, the boy will go online. Because of this problem, the two people always quarrel.
Once, the boy couldn't help but get angry at the girl: "What are you doing?
The girl replied to him: "Am I not your game?"
The two of them quarreled like this. The boy said, "Every time I go online, I see you playing a game, and I don't get a chance to talk to you." ”
The girl also said, "You don't play with me, you don't talk to me, how do I know what you're doing?"
The two of them became more and more noisy like this, and finally got into trouble.