There is another way of saying "reconciling with yourself" when you learn to bow your head.
Sometimes if you stubbornly maintain pride, you will lose more, and even miss irretrievable opportunities in life. At that time, I looked back on the past and sighed at what I did naively, and regretted it too late.
On the road of life, sometimes you need to bend your straight neck to cross this threshold, otherwise you can only be blocked from this step forever. It's just a step away, but it can be a whole different world for an important turning point in your life.
Take a step back and open the sky.
In "Do You Know", at the opening banquet of Minglan and Gu Tingye, Mrs. Zhang and Xiao Zou of the Uncle Mansion had a quarrel, stirring up the grand banquet held by Minglan as the head of the house for the first time after she got married, and this matter became a laughing stock in everyone's mouth, and even reached the ears of the eldest lady in the palace.
Minglan smashed the banquet herself, and everyone thought that this incident would slap the face of the new marquise. How do you know, Minglan has been a very good judge since she was a child, as long as her official Gu Tingye doesn't care about this matter, she won't care. Minglan is concerned about whether the lady in the palace will blame her Hou Ye because of her mother's affairs, and she is even more afraid that it will affect the future of the Hou Ye.
When Minglan got the queen's will and went to visit Mrs. Zhang in the uncle's mansion on behalf of the queen, the young marquise did the ultimate in how to arrange the priorities of things and bowed her head to make everyone look good and have face. Only Sheng Minglan lost face, but several families involved in this matter were appeased, and helped her official Gu Tingye maintain her interpersonal relationships in the court.
Therefore, taking a step back and opening up the sky, Minglan handled this matter to the satisfaction of everyone with 'how to bow her head obediently', and the final result was that she gained more admiration and love from the officials, the queen's gratitude to her, the hardcore best friend of a wealthy lady like Mrs. Zhang, and of course, the closer brotherhood between Uncle Guo and Gu Tingye.
The empress and the emperor expressed their sincerity of apology to the empress dowager and the old ministers.
The stupid behavior of Xiao Zou, the concubine of the uncle's mansion, 'murdering' Mrs. Zhang, who was in labor, almost shook the emperor's throne that Zhao Zongquan had just sat on, and the ignorance of Xiao Zou and the female dependents of Yuzhou had not yet seen through the old ministers of the previous dynasty who were already dissatisfied with the emperor.
But Minglan who came to live in the capital since she was a child, and was taught by an old grandmother who was the only daughter of a very wise and brave marquis, saw clearly the stakes behind this conflict.
She took the opportunity to enter the palace to make a bold statement to the queen, and used the story of Cao Cao's hair cutting the head to tell the queen, the queen is smart and knowledgeable, of course she knows how big the disaster is under the Xiao Zou family, if it can't be reasonably calmed down so that the old ministers and the queen mother can't find fault, her husband's position as the emperor, her son's position as the crown prince, and the river where their family finally got it, may have a big change because of this incident.
Therefore, the queen stayed awake all night, and the next morning she asked the grandmother next to her to take off the big beads on her queen's crown and personally send them to her younger daughter-in-law, Mrs. Zhang, as a gift to make amends, and the queen herself went to the emperor in the costume of a sinner to make amends. The queen's move gave Mrs. Zhang enough face, which was equivalent to giving the British Palace and other old ministers enough face, which was equivalent to a country later making amends to the old ministers for their lax family style and offending Mrs. Zhang.
Even the queen mother's mother said, "Have you ever seen a queen like her (Shen Congying) who wore hair and plain clothes to make amends."
At the moment when her husband's rights and status were coveted and shaken, the queen bravely stood up and took all the turmoil caused by Xiao Zou on herself, leaving aside the honor and majesty of the mother of a country, and bowing her head to admit her mistakes to the queen mother and the old ministers of the queen mother's party.
Therefore, learning to bow her head is sometimes to make things develop and change in her favor, and the queen bows her head appropriately and sincerely here, relieving a court change that is about to come out, and keeping her husband and son still in a stable position.
If you want to be flexible and get the results you want, then don't worry too much about so many trivial so-called feelings!