If the elderly and their children want to get along, opening these five locks is the key
As the years go by, everyone will enter old age, and the way they get along with their children in old age often determines the quality of life in a person's later life. In order to get along well with their children, the elderly need to open five locks of their hearts, so that communication and love flow in every corner of the family. This is not only for yourself, but also for maintaining the harmony and warmth of the family.
The first lock: to remain independent and understand what they do not understand
Independence is a must for everyone to grow, and seniors are no exception. With the changes of the times, the values and outlook of the younger generation are different from those of the older generation. Confucius once said, "Do not do unto others as you would have them do unto you." This sentence tells us to learn to empathize and understand our children's thoughts and choices. Maintaining independence, not only financially, but also ideologically, can better understand the confusion and pursuits of your children and not impose your own expectations on them.
In his later years, he still insisted on living and thinking independently, and he understood the younger generation's desire for freedom and independence, so he maintained good communication with the younger generation in literature and thought. He did not rely on the old and sell the old, but communicated with his children on an equal footing, which made him have a very harmonious relationship with his children.
In real life, we can also be like Ba Jin, maintain an independent way of living and thinking, and respect our children's choices and decisions, which can not only maintain family harmony, but also make our children respect and love us more.
The second lock: expand cognition and forgive them for not forgiving
With the progress of society and the development of science and technology, the new generation of young people is facing unprecedented challenges and opportunities. Their way of thinking, behavior, and values are different from ours. We need to constantly expand our knowledge in order to better understand and accept them.
Shakespeare once said, "Tolerance is like a drizzle of heaven that moistens the earth." It blesses the tolerant as well as the tolerated. "We need to learn to be tolerant and understanding of our children's thoughts and behaviors, and not to dwell on their small mistakes or behaviors that do not meet our expectations. This is the basis for a harmonious, warm family atmosphere.
Mr. Yang Jiang is a good role model. In her later years, she maintained her thirst for new knowledge and curiosity, and broadened her horizons through reading and learning. This spirit of continuous learning and improvement allows her to better understand the ideas and practices of young people, and thus forgive their misunderstandings and prejudices. We can also be like Yang Jiang, through learning and thinking to improve our cognitive level, better communication and get along with our children.
The third lock: to increase wisdom and understand what they do not understand
Wisdom is a precious asset in life, it can help us see things for what they are, so that we can better cope with life's challenges and problems. Socrates once said, "All I know is that I know nothing." This quote reminds us to stay humble and open-minded, and to keep learning and exploring new areas of knowledge.
As we grow older, we should continue to accumulate wisdom and learn to see through the essence of things, so as to better understand the confusion and pursuit of the younger generation, and provide them with valuable guidance and advice. In his later years, Mr. Ji Xianlin devoted himself to the study of Buddhism and cultural exchange, and improved his wisdom through continuous study and thinking, so that he could deeply understand the hardships and difficulties of the younger generation and provide them with appropriate analysis and insights. Improving one's own wisdom through continuous learning and thinking is the best channel to communicate and get along with children.
The fourth lock: let go of the ego and accept their disacceptance
When the elderly get along with their children, it is easy to have contradictions and conflicts because of their own stubbornness and prejudices. In order to avoid this from happening, we need to learn to let go of our stubbornness and prejudices and accept our children's different opinions and choices.
Lao Tzu mentioned in the Tao Te Ching: "Good is like water, and water is good for all things without fighting." This phrase tells us to learn to be as tolerant and accepting as water is to all things. When dealing with our children, we should be as tolerant of their different opinions and choices as water, and not impose our own expectations and ideas on them, which is the core of building a harmonious and equal family relationship.
In his later years, Mr. Qian Zhongshu gave full understanding and support to his children's career choices and lifestyles. He did not have contradictions and conflicts because his children's choices did not match his expectations, but chose to let go of himself and accept their disapproval. This attitude of letting go of oneself makes family relationships more harmonious.
The fifth lock: to manage life, to support their unsupport
Life is a precious asset, and we must cherish and manage our own life. When dealing with our children, we should face the challenges and problems in life with a positive attitude and give them the greatest support and encouragement.
Rabindranath Tagore once said, "Life is like the splendor of summer flowers, and death is like the quiet beauty of autumn leaves." "We should cherish every stage of life and face it with the most beautiful attitude. When dealing with our children, we should give them the greatest support and encouragement, even if their choices are not in line with our expectations, we should not easily give up on their tolerance and understanding, so that they can be more determined to follow their own path and bravely face the challenges ahead.
In his later years, the old man Bingxin still maintained his love for life and the pursuit of literature, and never complained or blamed his children even if their choices did not match their expectations. This kind of management attitude towards life is worth learning and learning from.
In short, it is very important to maintain a harmonious relationship with your children in old age and open the five locks of harmony with your children - maintaining independence, expanding cognition, improving wisdom, letting go of self and managing life, only in this way can we establish a harmonious and warm family atmosphere and make life more beautiful and happy in old age!