Do you remember the family treasure in "Alive"?
The daughter of the owner of a rice shop in the city, a schoolgirl who went to school and was very beautiful, but she married a not very good man, Fugui. Although Fugui's family has money, it is really not good for Jiazhen. Eat, drink, prostitute and gamble all of them, and beat Jiazhen when she was pregnant.
Such a man, at any time, is a proper scumbag, and whoever marries such a man is really eight lifetimes of mold.
But how?
Jiazhen is married to such a man. Not only that, Fugui also lost all the money in the family, leaving the family with no place to live and no money to spend.
If you were Jiazhen, would you resent this man, would you want to leave this man, would you forgive this man?
I don't think there are many women who don't resent it, who forgive, who will continue to live with this man.
But Jiazhen did it, and when Fugui asked her if she hated him to death, Jiazhen said no, and said that as long as he didn't gamble in the future, it would be fine.
Later, Jiazhen followed Fugui to live a hard life, and there was no complaint from beginning to end. And Fugui, who had nothing, finally embarked on the right path, began to feel sorry for his wife and children, and began to take on the family like a man.
Seeing this, you may think that I want to praise Jiazhen for her generosity and tolerance, this is not what I want to say today, what I want to say is how Jiazhen can continue to live with Fugui in this situation, and there is no complaint in her heart?
Let's not care whether Jiazhen is married to the right person, whether she should forgive Fugui, whether she should continue to live with him, or she can go back to her parents' house, after all, her family conditions are very good, and her father is willing to take her back.
Let's discuss how well Jiazhen's attitude of not complaining about anything and being positive and optimistic about life will make her live well?
Jiazhen has reason to complain, although the man she married has money in the family, he is unlearned, unreliable, and eventually loses all the property in the family. As for Jiazhen, his own conditions are very good, his family background is good, he looks good, and he is educated.
However, Jiazhen did not complain, no matter what Fugui looked like, no matter what kind of situation life pushed her to, even if she used to have no worries about eating or drinking, in the blink of an eye, it became a life that needed to rely on her own hands to barely make ends meet, she also silently accepted this status quo and actively faced all the ups and downs and misfortunes that life brought her.
It seems that for Jiazhen, all the setbacks and misfortunes in life are not so important, she just accepts all the arrangements of fate so naturally, for her, as long as she lives, she must face life well. So she never complains, and all her thoughts are focused on how to live the life in front of her.
She is a person who lives in the moment, she allows everything to happen, although life has brought her countless pains, even pain that ordinary people can't accept, from a rich person to a poor person, the departure of her son, the departure of her daughter, etc., but she is still strong and alive, reading "Alive" In this book, you can feel her pain, but you can't see her straining, she didn't deliberately put on a certain posture to fight against the injustice of fate, nor did she swear what she had to do, she just endured it so quietly, and quietly persevered and worked hard.
But I have to say that such a woman is really strong, even if she is ill-fated, even if she is often unlucky, even if the pain has to drown her, she still lives and lives seriously.
Because of this, the man who treated her badly in the past later began to feel sorry for her and care about her, so she could feel the happiness and joy brought to her by her son and daughter. Therefore, when she was able to reach the end of her life under the torture of illness, she could still say that she was satisfied with this life.
How many people have lived a lifetime luckier than her, much better than her, but they are still dissatisfied and still complaining.
For example, Cao Qiqiao in Zhang Ailing's "The Golden Lock".
Compared with Jiazhen, her life is really much better, at least she is not short of money, and her son and daughter have always been by her side, but how did she do it?
She hated all the people around her, she complained that she married a man who was not in good health, complained that her marriage was unhappy, complained that the people around her were not good to her, was jealous that her daughter was loved, personally broke up her daughter's marriage, and ruined her son's marriage, causing her son and daughter to be unwilling to be close to her in the end, and hated her in her heart.
To put it bluntly, Qiqiao is a person who doesn't know how to be content, she can only see the bad in her eyes, she can't see what she has, and she can't see the good side of life.
If she is like Jiazhen, she can see the good side of life, then her life is much stronger than Jiazhen, she is rich, her son and daughter are healthy, if she is willing to raise her two children seriously, create a healthy environment for them to grow up, and do not interfere with their marriage when she grows up, even if her husband is absent early, her old age will be quite happy.
But she didn't, she was jealous of everything that was good, and if she saw it, she would destroy it. Whoever gets close to her will be unlucky. So no one really loves her, even if she has children and daughters, she has never felt the joy of being a mother, and she has never brought happiness and joy to her children.
Therefore, how should a woman live in this life? Is it the result of her own choice, or has it been arranged by God?
In the final analysis, a woman's life, whether she lives well or badly, is the result of her own choices. We can't decide how others treat us, we can't predict how much pain and misery life will bring us, but we can always decide what we do and how we live.
And a woman who doesn't complain, who allows everything to happen, who can always live well, no matter how much pain life throws her, she won't live too badly.
Just like Jiazhen, in a sense, she is a very happy person.
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