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Yesterday, a friend's circle of friends posted the ratio of men and women in her son's class, 23 boys and 13 girls, a difference of 10 people.
There are several friends who like it, and they have said that the ratio of men and women in their children's classes is also out of balance, with more boys and fewer girls.
It's not surprising at all after reading it, my daughter is currently in kindergarten, there are 17 boys and 7 girls in the class, the ratio of men to women is more than 2:1.
My friend's child goes to a public kindergarten, my daughter goes to a private kindergarten, and among my friends, many of the classes have more boys and fewer girls, whether they are in public or private schools. Nanjing is like this, I don't know how you are there.
It has nothing to do with patriarchy
As far as our small circle is concerned, there are more boys and fewer girls, and it really has nothing to do with patriarchy.
Families who gave birth to a girl, many don't want a second child, and families who gave birth to a boy hope that the second child can have a girl, but the second child is still a boy, and there is a friend, the first child gave birth to a boy, and the second child came twin boys.
In fact, as far as Nanjing is concerned, especially in the urban area (there is still a patriarchal concept in the surrounding countryside), there is no traditional concept of preference for sons at all, and on the contrary, some young parents want their daughters more.
Parents of my generation treat boys the same way they treat girls, but it is also true that there is additional pressure to raise boys, and raising girls is the icing on the cake, so there are some people who want girls in particular.
To put it bluntly, if you raise a daughter, you can focus on nurturing your daughter, and when the child grows up, you can provide your child with a house, car, and savings within the scope of your ability.
Raising a son, a house, a car, and savings have become necessities, the two states are different, raising a daughter is incidental, because you have the conditions, so you can provide these for your daughter, so that your daughter has confidence, if you don't have such conditions, it doesn't matter. Raising a boy is a must in many people's minds, and if not, it will be much more difficult for the child to start a family when he becomes an adult.
In addition, daughters can always maintain a close relationship with their mothers, and after boys grow up, especially after marriage, the relationship with their parents will gradually become estranged, which is also a reason why some young parents want daughters.
Good mentality, no pressure
If you look at it locally, that is, in a small circle, in any case, the next generation of boys will be under more pressure when they become adults than they are now.
The imbalance between men and women, with more men than women, must be the root cause of the sharp increase in the cost of marriage.
But fortunately, this is only a part, after the children grow up, the area is circulating, so don't worry too much, keep a good attitude, anyway, the reality is in front of you, anxiety is useless.
Just like the family that raised three sons, the mother was particularly optimistic, she said: Raising three, it would be good to be able to raise them, and it was also equipped with a house and a car, don't even think about it, from now on to tell the three sons, in the future, we don't have such a big ability, and our family is not a demolition household.
Now the eldest son is in elementary school, in a very ordinary public school, there is no need for parents to worry about, and his academic performance is among the best, and the twin sons are in kindergarten, and the mother basically doesn't have to worry about it.
There must be a road before the car reaches the mountain, starting from reality, adjusting the mentality, and facing everything calmly, that's right.
Excessive anxiety is not helpful, and the most important thing is to educate children well
Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, they were, they are, and they will be in the future.
Life is hard, it was, it is, and it will be in the future.
If you want your child to live a slightly better life in the future, then educate and guide them from now on, and independence and self-improvement are fundamental.
If a boy has developed good habits, independence and autonomy under the guidance and education of his parents since he was a child, he will always be able to find his own future.
Have the ability to provide children with all kinds of resources, without that strength, educate the children well, let the children form a force by themselves, "rely on themselves" is not to teach or not, but when the children are young, manage and teach well, parents do what they can, and do a good job of paving the way for the children, so that the children can really rely on themselves and be born to the sun.
epilogue
can be casual, not rotten, the child's three views, personality, or related to parents and family environment, and these all affect the fate of the child to a greater or lesser extent.
If you can't give anything but some food to eat, and you're completely rotten in terms of education and guidance, then don't expect yourself to give birth to a genius, don't care, you will usher in a completely open life.