As the new generation of post-90s generations gradually enters the stage of parenthood, some traditional Spring Festival customs are also undergoing subtle changes. In the past, it was almost an unwritten rule for women to follow their men home for the New Year, but this year, there was a new trend of "each looking for his own mother" for the Spring Festival, which quickly aroused widespread attention and discussion in the society.
In the midst of the applause, one girl's personal experience brought a different voice to this new trend. She and her husband agreed that they would return to their respective homes for the Chinese New Year this year, so that both parents could enjoy the joy of reuniting with their children. When she joyfully informed her mother, who was far away from home, about her decision, she was disappointed by her reaction.
"Aren't you from his family? You should go back to his house." Her mother's words pierced her heart like a thorn. In the traditional concept of mothers, married daughters are like spilled water, and they are no longer part of the family. This realization made the girl feel helpless and painful, and tears swirled in her eyes, and finally burst out of her eyes.
When the girl expressed that when she went home to accompany the second elder during the Chinese New Year this year, what she was waiting for was not her mother's joy, but her mother's questioning: Aren't you also from his family? When the girl heard this, she was still smiling.
Later, the mother laughed at her daughter, saying that her own family and her own family have been, aren't you their own family? It can be seen that the girl's mood at this time has been greatly fluctuated, and even laughter is bitter.
And my mother's last sentence completely became the last straw that crushed her: You are a girl who got married, and the water that was spilled out, you should go back to their house for the New Year
And after hearing this, the girl couldn't hold back at all, tears burst out of her eyes, she didn't expect that her biological mother would say this to herself, she was looking forward to the joy of her family, but she didn't expect to get disgust and rejection, which is why no one can bear it.
As soon as this matter was shared on the Internet, it immediately aroused heated discussions among netizens. Many expressed their understanding of the girl's plight and lamented that traditional ideas still hold on modern women. "Don't overestimate your status at home", "Married girl, your parents don't want you to go home so much" and other remarks emerge one after another, making people wonder: in modern society, how to reconcile the conflict between women's family status and traditional concepts?
Some netizens told the truth: only only one child and two female households, the mother's family is the real home, this point of view has been agreed by the majority of netizens, it seems that there are still many female netizens who empathize.
Some netizens also warned married and unmarried women: Don't overestimate your status at home, especially in families with older brothers and younger brothers.
The experience of this netizen should be in line with most families with younger brothers, the girl invited her parents to her new house for the New Year, but her parents refused, and asked them to come, you can do it, as long as you help your younger brother find a stable job with you, we will come back. This answer also pierced her daughter's heart deeply.
At the same time, there are also voices pointing out that the way of returning to each family for the New Year may be more suitable for single-child families, and for those with siblings, such an arrangement may lead to unnecessary family disputes. What's more, according to the traditional concept of the older generation in some places, the daughter who marries out may be regarded as a ruin in her parents' home in the first and second years of junior high school, which further reflects the stereotypical definition of women's roles in traditional concepts.
Unexpectedly, there are still many feudal traditions of the older generation, and parents don't want their daughters to go back to their parents' homes for the New Year
The netizen's cousin is divorced, and the family doesn't let her go back, and what's even sadder is that the netizen's mother also agrees with this idea, the Chinese New Year is a day of family reunion, and if she doesn't let her go back, she just doesn't recognize this person as a family.
Faced with such a dilemma, many women are beginning to re-examine their family status and life choices. More and more young women are choosing to work hard or even buy their own houses in order to be able to have more autonomy and voice in society. They are no longer satisfied with being just an accessory to the family, but hope to be able to find their place in the family and society, and realize their own value.
In fact, their parents refused to allow their daughters to go back to their parents' homes for the New Year, have you ever thought that this is not feudal superstition, nor is it a shameful thing in the eyes of outsiders, but a manifestation that their parents really don't love their children enough. Many parents of the post-90s generation said that they would not let their daughters suffer such treatment in the future, so that the old tradition of the post-90s generation began to break.