Why do we have to give children a sense of ritual during the Chinese New Year? This is the best answer I've ever heard

It's the end of the year and the beginning of spring.

Some people say:

"The New Year is not interesting! As long as you move your fingers to buy things, you can go to the hotel for a meal when you Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, new clothes can be worn all year round, the Spring Festival couplets are just a few words, the Spring Festival Gala is getting less and less good-looking, sending photos, brushing videos, grabbing red envelopes, sleeping lazy, the Spring Festival is like this......"

After listening to this complaint, it reminds people of a sentence: the opposite of happiness is not unhappiness, but numbness.

With the improvement of living standards, people are becoming more and more greedy for convenience and keen to solve all problems with money and the Internet.

A perfunctory and casual attitude is the greatest disrespect for life.

"Is it useful to complain about Xingzhi education?" Xingzhi Education is a professional brand of family education in China, and now there are more than 100W groups of families in Xingzhi to get help, Xingzhi not only has professional teachers to help you, but also a large number of famous teachers to teach and guide, Hu Jianyun teacher, Cao Hong teacher, Yu Hongjie teacher and so on. Xingzhi is a combination of online and offline teaching methods to provide help to parents and achieve a happy family.

Someone on the Internet asked: Why is the New Year's flavor getting weaker and weaker?

Someone replied:

I saw many people say that the New Year now lacks a sense of ceremony, so the taste of the New Year is weak, but in fact, it is not that the taste of the New Year is weak, but that the hearts of the people are scattered. If you are still looking forward to this festival, you will still find that the flavor of the New Year is everywhere.

Yes, the taste of the New Year has faded, and the sense of happiness has decreased, not because life is better, but because people are lazy.

We have made the New Year an ordinary holiday, and we no longer pay for it with careful preparation, nor do we pay for it with great anticipation.

The lack of rituals is the biggest regret of growing up.

When the sense of ceremony is enough, the flavor of the New Year is strong

Barbara Fiese, Ph.D., Ph.D., and her team have been studying "family ritual inheritance" for more than 50 years, and their research concluded:

The sense of ritual in the family will soak into the flesh and blood of the children, so that they are full of a sense of belonging, security and purpose, so that they will not feel lonely on the long road of life.

Liu Ye once posted a group of photos of celebrating the Spring Festival in his wife Anna's hometown on Weibo, which received nearly 400,000 likes.

Anna carefully prepared beautiful tableware, wrapped decent dumplings, hung red lanterns and gold couplets on a red background at home, children wore placket Tang costumes, knelt in front of their grandfather in turn, kowtowed to receive New Year's money, red envelopes were in hand, children couldn't wait to open them, family portraits of a family loving each other......

The strong smell of the New Year came across the screen. In France, where there is no tradition of the Spring Festival, they still celebrate the Chinese New Year with a prosperous taste.

Anna once said, "I like to do ritualistic things, it reminds us that time is not wasted, and we should cherish the rest of our lives." ”

The sense of ritual is not formalism, it is the enthusiasm and respect for life, which gives the color and meaning of ordinary life.

How important it is for children to have a ceremonial New Year

The sense of ritual of the New Year is not hypocritical, but a positive, open-minded and optimistic attitude towards life.

A netizen posted that when he was a child, he felt that every year during the Chinese New Year, adults would become very "exquisite".

On the twenty-third day of the lunar month, the day of the new year began to worship the god of the stove, and the father would worship while chanting words in his mouth;

"On the twenty-fourth day of the lunar month, dust and sweep the house", my mother would move everything that could be moved in the house to the yard and clean it inside and out. He would follow along to clean the window lattices, wash the rags, and look at the new home, and his heart was full of hope.

"On the twenty-fifth day of the lunar month, push and grind to make tofu";

"On the twenty-sixth day of the lunar month, kill pigs and cut New Year's meat";

"On the twenty-ninth day of the lunar month, go to the grave and ask the ancestors to make a big offering"

On the evening of the thirtieth day of the Chinese New Year's Eve, you must watch the Spring Festival Gala.

.......

He said that the flavor of the year in his memory is rooted in his childhood memories and is now precious.

It is precisely because of those seemingly trivial rituals that he understands that the New Year is about "saying goodbye to the old and welcoming the new" and "reunion".

Now, no matter how far the way home is, no matter how cramped the various means of transportation are, he has to go home for the New Year.

Because, "Chinese New Year" has become a belief rooted in the heart.

Haruki Murakami said:

"Without this little luck, life would be nothing more than a dry desert. ”

The sense of ritual of the New Year will allow children to find a poetic life, find the glimmer of light to move forward, and find the courage to compromise in ordinary and trivial days, which is the best gift for parents to give their children growth.

New Year's customs that have been passed down from generation to generation can be lost in families that lack a sense of ritual.

Nowadays, we want our children to know that the Spring Festival is not only a holiday, but also a festival to inherit folk customs and convey happiness.

A ceremonial New Year can bring children a full sense of happiness, and the good memories and happiness left behind can nourish a lifetime. 

This is the flavor of the New Year! A list of rituals that must be done for the New Year and children

In fact, children originally have a natural yearning for festivals, and it is we adults who are rough.

If you don't want your child to have a bland and ordinary Spring Festival, it is better to create a sense of ritual with your child to make the New Year different from every other day.

1. Take your children to "busy the New Year" and feel the excitement and fireworks of the New Year

From the preparation of the year before the year to the New Year's greetings after the year, try to find opportunities for children to participate.

For example, on the day of house cleaning, let the child and his parents clean the house together.

For example, let the child paste the Spring Festival and prepare the Chinese New Year's Eve dinner with adults.

For example, give children New Year's money, and tell them the meaning and origin of the New Year's money;

You can also take your children to pay New Year's greetings to your elders, teach your children to say auspicious New Year's greetings, and educate your children about the etiquette and taboos of the Spring Festival.

Allowing children to participate in the New Year's ceremony can not only let them experience the joy of the New Year more deeply, but also let children feel the traditional culture of the Spring Festival in their lives.

2. Take a family photo in the same place and in the same way every year

In the BBC documentary "Chinese New Year", I was impressed by a mother who settled in the UK, who took her husband and a pair of children back to Beijing for the New Year and visited her parents and brothers.

Before she came, she did not forget to let the children draw a portrait of the whole family, and carefully framed it all the way back to China.

The old father, who was suffering from Alzheimer's, received the "family photo" in his hand and was moved to tears.

In fact, we can also take a family photo at a fixed time and place during the Spring Festival every year to keep the warm moment.

Taking a "family photo", a sense of ritual between families, often has a strong cohesion.

The sense of belonging and connection symbolized behind it lets children know that there is love, home, and happiness!

3. Accompany your children to create unique memories that are unique to you

For today's children, what is really exciting may no longer be the delicious food and good drink.

It's a happy family atmosphere where parents can put down work and devote themselves to them, and the family is busy, saying goodbye to the old and welcoming the new.

On this special occasion of the New Year, we might as well accompany our children to create a sweet time for the family.

For example, take the child to watch a movie that the child likes, walk into the childlike world of the child, discuss the plot with the child, put down the adult shelf, and be friends with the child;

For example, to give each other New Year's gifts, it doesn't have to be expensive, just be attentive;

For example, take children to participate in parent-child games and experience the fun of children;

For example, take your children to visit relatives and experience the flow and joy of love.

Let children feel the love of their parents, and let them learn to love their families.

The sense of ritual is not an expensive and laborious thing.

There can be many forms of ritual, don't let the trivialities and numbness of life break the softness of your heart.

As long as parents are willing to put a little effort into it, they will let their children have a unique memory in their eyes.

The year full of rituals can nourish children's childhood, so that children are full of longing for the coming year and full of hope for the future in the process of saying goodbye to the old and welcoming the new.

As the writer Mai Pengpeng said: "What kind of ritual you give your child, what kind of values he will gain from it." ”

The sense of ritual of the New Year is also a kind of strength.

It's to make the child feel -

Even though time goes by, your parents still love you as before;

No matter where you are, home is always the deepest concern.

Let's take action together, let children feel the unique sense of ritual of the New Year, and create happy memories belonging to the family together!