The Tsinghua Xuebuli murder case that occurred in the United States in January this year shocked the whole network!
The tragedy begins and ends
The male protagonist of the incident is called Chen Liren, who was the champion of the college entrance examination in Chengdu that year, with excellent academic performance since childhood, and he is also tall and big, a typical "excellent child of other people's families".
The heroine of the incident is named Yu Xuanyi, who was the top student in the college entrance examination in Songyuan, Jilin that year, and she was also excellent all the way.
The two of them were admitted to Tsinghua University at the same time, studying in the same major, and they were talented and beautiful, and they were an enviable pair of beautiful people! After graduation, they went to the United States for further study. Their life stories are not without their wonders. The beautiful romance that started on campus cannot be said to be without a deep emotional foundation.
At the beginning, Chen Liren worked at Google, and Chen Xuanyi worked at Amazon. Both of them are very capable of working, and they bought a house in the United States for more than 2 million last year.
Chen Xuanyi's performance at work is very good, and he is often praised, Chen Liren is worried that his excellent wife will leave him, so he asks Li Xuanyi to also transfer to Google.
The problem is that as a colleague, Li Xuanyi's work ability is stronger than Chen Liren's. The two are tense and form a competitive situation. In daily life, there are constant quarrels, and there will even be physical collisions...... If one side wants to control, the other side wants to counter-control. There are serious problems in the relationship between the two.
The fuse of the tragedy originated from Li Xuan's divorce from Chen Liren, and now, under the impact of anger, dissatisfaction, jealousy and other emotions, Chen Liren's strong self-esteem as a man was seriously suppressed, and the demon in his heart was completely released, so in this way, he committed a crime of passion: he killed his wife with his bare hands.
We can imagine the anger in his heart when he committed the murder, when he was like a vicious beast, whose humanity was full of truth, goodness, beauty, and moral restraint all gone, and reason was long gone, as if he had become a demon.
I think he must have regretted it afterwards, not only brutally killing his pillow person, but also burying his brilliant future with his own hands.
So says the Chinese lawyer
After the incident, many people couldn't figure out Chen Liren's motive for killing, and various theories circulated on the Internet.
The remarks of a Chinese lawyer have solved a mystery in people's minds.
In the United States, this lawyer often takes on cases from high-level people in the Chinese community: such as marriage and economic cases of high-level intellectuals such as senior engineers and high-tech practitioners.
"I know very well the people in this circle, and quite a few of them are highly intelligent and low EQ," the lawyer said publicly. They are often prone to over-the-top rhetoric and are extremely poor at managing their emotions......"
Let's trace the growth process of Chen Liren and Li Xuanyi, it is not difficult to find that they are the kind of people who have lived in a highly competitive environment since childhood, and have spent a lot of energy and time in their studies and exams. All the way through five levels and six generals to become a top student in a famous school. The sense of competition that you compete with me has long been deeply rooted in the bone marrow.
Even if the other party is his wife, Chen Liren can't accept that Li Xuanyi is better than himself, the two don't give in to each other, coupled with the lack of emotional management, which eventually caused the tragedy.
Disadvantages of education under the competitive mechanism
The mainland is an examination-oriented education system under the competition mechanism, and since childhood, we have to take frequent exams, rank second, compare with others, and compete; we have been taught since childhood to do better than others in the examinations, surpass others, and only then can we rank first.
The high school entrance examination and the college entrance examination are like thousands of troops crossing a single-plank bridge, which is a fierce competition and a battle of life and death. A one-point difference in the score of the college entrance examination can change the fate of many people.
When our children are exposed to this high competition from an early age, many evil things in their humanity will be brought out. They will pay special attention to the fame and fortune of the outside world, and are always in a state of mind that they want to compete with others to win or lose, because they are used to enjoying the happiness of "victory", but they can't bear the feeling of failure. When I was studying, I was comparing my grades, ranking and who was better at school. After entering the workplace, you will naturally compare positions, incomes, houses, and cars......
However, there are people outside the world, there is heaven outside the sky, there is actually no comparison between people, everyone's life circumstances, life experience, and even health levels are different, and it is meaningless to completely pin the meaning of one's life on these external things. At the same time, it is also very draining.
Under the guidance of this mentality, when there is a certain strong stimulus in the outside world, or in a certain environment, many people will transform from a gentleman to a demon.
This is also the reason why Chen Liren, who is gentle and elegant in the eyes of others, has done such a jaw-dropping thing.
How to avoid competition
At the beginning of this year, I watched the documentary "Childhood in a Foreign Country" produced by CCTV reporter Zhou Yijun, which showed the public the educational concepts of different countries.
Among them, Finland's education is the most praised, and its education model is also the most different from other countries in the world.
The most special thing about Finland is that there are no exams, no rankings, and the competition is completely avoided, and the child's personality and talent are maximized.
Children who grow up in such an environment will naturally pay attention to their inner self, their mentality will be much better, and their sense of happiness will be stronger.
The Dutch psychologist Roy Martiner divides people's happiness into three levels: the first level is competitive happiness, that is, if I win you, I will be happy, which is to base my own happiness on the unhappiness of others.
The second level is conditional happiness, for example, I buy a luxury car, or how much money I make I am happy, this happiness is the happiness of seeking from the outside, and it cannot last long.
The third level is unconditional happiness, which is the heartfelt, truly long-lasting happiness. Only those who have this kind of happiness can truly have a happy life.
I hope that we and our children can find our own true happiness, instead of being imprisoned and kidnapped by external things.
Wife murder is a thing of the past, and the greatest significance of media coverage is to be able to gain food and inspiration from it, and to avoid the recurrence of similar tragedies.