Approaching the New Year, young people often re-examine their work, thinking about the amount of year-end bonuses, mental state and the cost-effectiveness of quitting.
When the naked resignation and going home for the New Year occurred at the same time, economic problems and career planning problems appeared one after another, and between them and their parents, warmth and contradictions flew together:
I officially left my job in early November this year, and my resignation was just before the National Day, when I worked overtime for two weeks in a row before the holiday, and my physical and mental exhaustion reached its peak. The fuse was that the department leader said at the meeting that the company's efficiency was not good this year, and the funds for going out for team building were not enough, and the employees needed to subsidize part of it. At that moment, I felt that I was not working, but losing money, and the next day I resigned.
After working for a few years, my savings were hundreds of thousands, which could support me to rest for two years, and the economic conditions of my family were not bad, so the pressure at that time was not great. I didn't tell my parents about the naked resignation in advance, because they would never agree to it. At that time, my dad was terminally ill of cancer, and my mom was so busy every day that I didn't want to make trouble for them, and I didn't want to make myself unhappy.
After subletting the house in Shanghai, I went back to my hometown to take care of my father, and during this time, I also found a medical agent to take him to Hong Kong for several medical treatments. In fact, before I came back, I knew that my father's illness would not last for a few months, and he passed away at the end of December. At that time, I had a very mixed feeling, on the one hand, I felt fortunate that I had resigned and returned home, and I was able to accompany him in the last few months of his life, so that he would not have lifelong regrets. On the other hand, after reading all the bills for the treatment, I regret that I resigned impulsively, so I might as well endure and get the year-end bonus.
It's my mom who really stresses me out these months. For her, taking care of my dad for more than a year is really hard, and it is difficult for outsiders to empathize. When I came back, all her pent-up emotions were vented on me. Before my father died, she asked someone to tell my fortune, asked me how I could find a boyfriend, and urged me to marry two times in three days, and the words were "Don't let your father still worry about you finding a partner before he dies".
After dealing with my father's funeral, she didn't care so much about me finding a partner and began to urge me to find a job.
In my own plan, my current savings will support me for two years, so I hope that I can travel around and take a break, and then use the rest of my time to do something that I want to do for a long time, which can be regarded as a low-cost small business, and if it doesn't work out, I will look for a job in a year.
But in the eyes of the older generation, people must not live without a stable job, especially since I am still single and my ability to resist risks is too poor. On the other hand, my dad used to be the breadwinner at home, but after he died, my mom was financially insecure. In just a few months, the family has undergone such a big change, and she has to learn to take over her father's business from scratch from a retiree, which is even more stressful.
I told my mom about my plans, but she ignored me and urged me to look for a job in the future. The most devastating moment for me was last week, when I was doing my own thing in my bedroom, and my mom came in and saw me in front of the computer with headphones on, thinking I was playing a game, and started talking all the time, saying that I was ignorant and wouldn't let her worry. At that moment, I was extremely emotional, and I couldn't help but cry and quarrel with her.
Now I've moved out of my house and went to live with my cousin. Although I can understand my mother, I am really worried that the mother-daughter relationship will break down if I continue to live there.
I still plan to go to Southeast Asia for a period of time after the year, after all, the opportunity of GAP is quite rare, and I will see if there are any good job opportunities after the beginning of spring.
The resignation has always been in my plan, because I have been doing the side business of daigou, and my income has been relatively stable in the past few years, which can be the same as my salary at my own job in an Internet company. But doing purchasing agents while going to work is really very tiring, in the last two or three years, I basically have no personal time, and all the holidays are used for work. I believe that if I can devote more time and energy to Daigou, I can make more money and balance my work and life, so I have been looking for a suitable opportunity to quit my job all year after last year.
The original plan was to wait until the end of the two New Year's and get the year-end bonus before leaving, but unfortunately the landlord in Beijing was going to sell the house, and I needed to move out before the end of the year. At that time, I weighed the cost-effectiveness of looking for a new house and resigning directly, and felt that it was not cost-effective to toss around for three or four months, so I proposed to resign with the leader.
After I resigned, I first went to Europe for the New Year, and then I went back to my hometown to spend time with my parents. Because my family is in Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai, it is more convenient for purchasing agents, the cost of flying to Japan is much lower than that of Beijing, and new pearl business can be opened.
I thought I had a side hustle and my parents wouldn't have reacted very much to my naked resignation, but it didn't turn out to be like this. The first few days after I came back were quite harmonious, and after a few days, my parents began to ask me how much I should have been in this year's year-end bonus.
In mid-January, I flew to Japan to buy on behalf of Japan, and when I came back, my parents seemed to be quite dissatisfied. After two days, I found out that they thought that I was going to Japan to buy on behalf of the company, but in fact, I wanted to go out and have fun. In the final analysis, they don't recognize the profession of daigou, and even if they earn well, they still feel that it is unstable and undignified.
Now every day at home is a tug-of-war, I try to explain to them what I'm doing now, they try to persuade me to take the public exam. I thought I could have a good year this year after a long absence, but now it seems impossible, I plan to book a ticket for the second or third year of junior high school to go to Japan and South Korea to buy a circle, and it is better to go out and make money when I am angry at home.
In 2022, when housing prices were just starting to fall, I used my savings to buy a two-bedroom apartment in my hometown of Wuhan. Since then, leaving Shanghai has been a part of my plan. Last year, I worked hard to save money and do side hustles, and I basically saved enough money for renovation. I originally wanted to leave my job and return to Wuhan after winning the year-end bonus in February 24, but I didn't expect that at the conference a few months ago, the boss suddenly announced that the year-end bonus in 2024 would be postponed to June.
I struggled for two weeks about whether to stay in Shanghai for six months or give up the year-end bonus and go back to Wuhan, and finally I chose the latter. On the one hand, because our company has been very picky, the year-end bonus is at most one or two thousand, and the attraction is not particularly large; on the other hand, the year after the year is the cheapest time for decoration, taking advantage of the start of construction after the year, you can save a lot of money for decoration. As I came and went, I didn't think it was necessary to stay up until June.
I have already discussed with my parents about the resignation of the naked person to return to Wuhan, but the time is a little earlier, and their opinions are not very big. I also promised them that when the renovation was on the right track, I would look for a new job.
The biggest contradiction is that the living habits of our two generations are too different. I've been in boarding school since junior high school, and I rarely live at home for long periods of time, and my mom just retired in the past two years, so we spend a lot more time together than we used to do during winter and summer vacations. Every morning, my mother would not come to urge me to get up, but at eight or nine o'clock she would start cleaning up the house and cleaning, trying to wake me up in this way; when I was working in Shanghai, I used to eat only two meals a day, but my mother obviously did not accept my lifestyle, and forced me to eat three meals on time every day.
Another point is that I am used to living alone in Shanghai, and I am not used to living with my parents every day. On New Year's Eve, my parents went back to their hometown to see my grandmother. That day, I was alone at home ordering takeout, playing games, and going out to watch movies, and that long-lost sense of freedom made me feel a little bit like living in Shanghai.
But these are small problems, every time I feel uncomfortable, I comfort myself, start the renovation after the year, and it will be fine after moving in October.
Interview: Echo
Editor: Bela