Narrator: Xie Yunfan
Written by: Brother Minghao
I stood on the empty street, the cold wind blowing, and I couldn't help but clench my arms and shiver.
In the past few days, under the influence of the cold air in the north, the temperature in Guangdong has changed abruptly, the temperature is only a few degrees, and the cold wind keeps pouring into the neck, feeling colder than the hometown in central China.
Many shops on the street have closed, and most of the shopkeepers are outsiders, rushing back to their hometowns to prepare for the Chinese New Year.
I finally saw an open porridge and noodle shop, which was opened by a local, with a simple layout, messy tables and chairs, and steaming in the pot of boiling water, which had a homely atmosphere.
I hurried into the store and ate a bowl of rice noodles to avoid the cold wind and warm my body.
The store brought the soup rice noodles, which were steaming hot and fragrant, and took a sip of the soup to warm the heart.
I gulped down the rice noodles, and before I knew it, tears were sliding down my face and falling into the bowl.
The shopkeeper is a woman in her thirties, with her hair coiled and a floral apron, looking neat with her hands and feet.
She asked me with a concerned face: "Big brother, what's wrong with you? Haven't you gone home for the New Year? This year, business is sluggish, the factory has an early holiday, and there are no more customers in the store." ”
I sighed and said, "Nothing, just remembering something." I'm not going home for the New Year. ”
She sighed, comforted me, and turned away, leaving me alone.
I didn't care about the tears falling into the bowl, and continued to eat in large gulps, all kinds of sweet and sour tastes welled up in my heart.
I am a middle-aged man in my forties, who has been working in Guangdong for nearly 20 years.
When I came to this hot land with dreams and enthusiasm, I also worked hard and had a youthful unbridled.
In my early years, I worked in a factory, and like many young workers, I worked hard during the day for a few taels of silver, and when I didn't work overtime at night, I played, drank, played cards, or went shopping with migrant girls and had supper.
I've been working for a few years, and I'm in my twenties, and I've talked about an object, it's from another province, and we have a good personality, and we're very happy together.
Our family conditions are comparable, I thought we would come together, but who knew that after going home for the Chinese New Year, she wouldn't come over and couldn't be contacted.
According to her fellow countryman, her parents didn't want her to marry a poor boy from another province, so let her go on a blind date in her hometown, the conditions were naturally much better than mine, and she knew the roots, so she didn't have to marry far away.
I can't blame her and her parents for being too realistic, what she grasps in front of her is reliable, to be honest, even if she follows me and pursues ethereal love, with my ability at the time, it can't guarantee to give her happiness.
After learning from the pain, you still have to start your own business, have your own business, get ahead, flowers and butterflies come from you, where is there no grass in the world?
At that time, I had a deposit of 20,000 or 30,000 yuan, and a good former colleague invited me to open a restaurant together.
I was hot-headed, just fantasizing about restaurants opening bigger and bigger, branches opening more and more, counting money softly, completely ignoring that I was a newbie in the industry, and I didn't do market research or study the location of the store.
My partner and I have limited cooking skills, so we can't get on the table, so we can only hire a chef whose salary accounts for the majority of the restaurant's expenses.
After the restaurant opened, there was no business for two months, and we didn't know where to start, so we had to be in a hurry.
After three months, seeing that the restaurant was unable to make ends meet, and the daily expenses could not be shaken, we had to invest additional money to pay the rent, but the partners and I had the same thoughts, and they were unwilling to take out the money.
Until the chef quit his job, we didn't have the confidence to continue the business, so we had to close the business and the money we invested was wasted.
After this experience of opening a restaurant, I thought that I was not the material for business, and I gave up the idea of making a fortune in business, and I still honestly found a place to work.
In the years that followed, I traveled to the Pearl River Delta, went to several cities, and worked for a living.
During this period, I also had several relationships, all of which were unsuccessful. Maybe I don't have peach blossom luck in this life, or rather, it's because of my personality, I'm a little selfish, inconsiderate, and can't keep the other party's heart.
Now that I think about it, I regret it a little. At the beginning, if I had managed a relationship seriously and could have achieved success, I would have had a warm home, a gentle and virtuous wife, a well-behaved and sensible child, and a happy family, so naturally I would have taken responsibility for the family, why did I fall to such a point?
When your parents are there, your home is there. During the years when my parents were alive, I worked outside, and every year I would go back for the Chinese New Year to accompany them, and my sister would also take my nephew back to her parents' house to meet us.
Seeing that I am a year older, but the major events in my life have not been settled, my parents are very anxious, and they also found a matchmaker at home to help me say goodbye, but I only go back for a few days every year for the New Year, and my appearance is not outstanding, and I don't have much money in my pocket, so I can't do it.
When I was thirty-five years old, I met a divorced woman named Ah Feng in the factory, who was the same age as me, and had a child left in her hometown to take with her ex-in-laws, and she had to call back every week to ask about the child.
After meeting Ah Feng, the two hard-working people hit it off, we rented a room, she relived the warmth of love, I felt the warmth of the family, and smiled every day. It was a happy time in my life.
I hope that I will go on with Ah Feng for a long time, and I will also treat the children in her hometown as my own, so I am usually not stingy in food and clothing.
Once, Ah Feng's ex-in-laws called Ah Feng and said that her child was hospitalized due to illness, and she was so anxious that she didn't sleep all night and wanted to go home to see the child.
But at that time, the factory was in a hurry and was not allowed to ask for leave, and Ah Feng learned that the child was not serious, so she was relieved and wanted to send some money to express her heart, but she was inconvenient for a while.
Later, I sent her back the money, and I naturally wouldn't let her pay it back, I was in a relationship with her, and I didn't have to be too clear, her child was my child.
Fate played a joke on me again, after Ah Feng returned for the Chinese New Year that year, under the persuasion of her in-laws and the crying of her children, she remarried her ex-husband without even saying hello to me.
After this blow, I was completely disappointed in the so-called relationship between men and women, and from then on I didn't think about it, I fed the whole family alone, drank a little wine, and lived a bad life.
When my parents were there, they were worried about their children day and night, and they looked forward to me coming home for the New Year every year. Home is the place where my soul belongs, and I am willing to go home for the New Year, chat with my parents, eat and eat, and let the strong family affection soothe my wounded heart.
After the death of his parents two years ago, the home was gone. My sister has her own family, and I have been working outside for many years, so it makes no sense to go back to that cold and dusty home for the New Year alone.
Although my sister called me several times and asked me to go to her house for the New Year, it was somewhat inconvenient and faceless, so I shirked it.
In the blink of an eye, I spent two years alone outside. Although I was sad, fate made me fall into such a situation, self-pity, and it didn't help.
There is no hope in life, and you still have to work hard to go on!