Sunlight shone through the glass window onto my fingers tapping on the keyboard, golden frecks dancing with the fluttering curtains. Sitting in this room of less than ten square meters, I took a deep breath, and the content displayed on the screen seemed to mock me - "total income at the end of the year: 65,000 yuan".
Looking back on the days and nights of this year, I was like a silent grass, growing lonely in the sea of information. I know that there are countless grasses in the same ocean, the same silent cultivation, the same struggle for subsistence.
A year ago, I made headlines with a love for writing and a dream of something extraordinary. At the beginning, my heart was full of yearning for the glamorous digital age. I thought it would be a paradise of ideas, and every keystroke was my interpretation of the world.
However, reality quickly slapped me in the face. Toutiao's article promotion is undoubtedly a long-term battle. You need to keep catching hot spots and constantly adapting to changes in the algorithm. And I, a fledgling rookie, was ignorant, and my articles seemed to be just stones thrown into the sea, stirring up a few splashes and then sinking silently.
"To persevere, or to give up?" is a question that weighs heavily on my shoulder every day like an invisible hand. The advice of friends, the concern of family, and the insistence on the passion for writing form the most fierce confrontation. But my heart has always leaned towards the latter. In the world of writing, I found my sense of belonging, even if it was meager, it was my spiritual home.
This may be a fraction of what many of your peers earn. My family started to worry, my friends were talking about it in private, and some people even bluntly said to me, "Is this promising? How about a more reliable job?"
Sometimes, I began to doubt myself deeply. Am I not strong enough to write, or am I choosing the wrong platform? Some nights, I sit for a long time in the dim light, staring at the indifferent screen in a daze. The gaze of my companions, the tacit understanding of my family, the support of my friends, and the likes and comments of every reader, these bits and pieces of my barren life have become my motivation to move forward. That attachment in my heart made me rediscover the courage, the courage to choose to believe in tomorrow even in difficult times.
But I didn't give up. In a seemingly desperate cycle, I began to try to break through myself. I delved into the patterns behind those "hit" articles, I adjusted my writing style by staying up late and waking up early, and I began to interact with readers more actively. I knew that if I wanted to survive in this competitive land, I had to make myself stronger.
As time went on, my efforts began to slowly bear fruit. The number of readers who follow me has gradually increased, and although the income is not too much, it has also begun to grow steadily. Whenever I see someone like or comment on the results of my late-night writing, the sense of accomplishment cannot be measured in money.
At the same time, the videos produced also began to appear popular.
In this way, a year passed quietly, from the beginning of a few cents to the final result of a year in Toutiao - 65,000 yuan. It may not be exhilarating on a material level, but every keystroke and every post is a testament to my love. They are piled up into an unbreakable belief: as long as you don't give up, there will always be a day of harvest.
Now, when I ask myself again, "Can I keep doing it?" I know the answer is yes. Not only because my perseverance and hard work have finally paid off, but also because in my opinion, this 65,000 yuan is not only income, it represents the belief that I have adhered to, and I have continued to try and grow for a year.