Some people say that a 40-year-old woman is tofu dregs, while others say that a 40-year-old woman only has one flower.
This is a judgment of the appearance of middle-aged women, and it is also a summary of their inner world.
People are not confused, and if they still speak blindly in front of others without moderation, it is a true portrayal of emptiness. The brain is like tofu dregs, confused and stupid!
01: Said that her husband was not in front of her in-laws
Husband and wife have lived for many years, and conflicts and frictions are inevitable.
Sometimes, the husband's thoughts and actions can drive the wife crazy. The two can communicate and even quarrel, but must not report to their in-laws.
In daily life and film and television dramas, we have seen many classic cases. Even on principled issues such as cheating, no matter how much the mother-in-law beats and scolds her husband, no matter how good she is to her daughter-in-law, she will only stand on her son's side in the end.
No one wants to hear someone say their child is bad, so there is no such thing as an absolutely fair parent.
You think that your intimacy with your parents-in-law is based on your love for your house and their son since starting a family, rather than loving the birds of your own roof more.
Therefore, do not talk to your in-laws about any disputes between spouses. This not only did not solve the problem, but instead exacerbated the family conflict, turning the matter between two people into a conflict between two or even three families.
A wise woman does not criticize her husband in front of her in-laws. Even if they mention it voluntarily, they don't open their mouths wide to say dirty words because when they click on it, they have already noticed something unusual from the eyes of their in-laws.
02: Saying that children are not good in front of outsiders
Every child is the best baby in the hearts of their parents. Even though they know that every child has strengths and weaknesses, they don't want others to gossip.
However, many years ago, most people's social image was humble and polite. When their children's grades are praised by the outside world, mothers will always show off their low-key qualities with other shortcomings.
But this behavior is not understood by children, which leads to frustration and sadness in them.
To this day, although parents no longer do this, there are times when they may have conflicts with their children due to excessive pursuit of an equal parent-child relationship, feeling frustrated and unable to resolve and can only talk to others.
However, instead of elicit sympathy, this behavior will be interpreted as a complaining mother who does not know how to guide her children.
Once this argument reaches the ears of the child, it will lead to a greater family war and greatly reduce the image of the mother in everyone's mind.
Therefore, a wise woman will not nag others, but knows how to praise and defend her children in front of outsiders, and establish a good parent-child relationship, which is more important than any achievement.
03: Speak out about your parents' dissatisfaction in front of your husband
Husbands and wives are inherently one, and telling parents about their husband's bad behavior can lead to their dissatisfaction with their son-in-law.
If these words are not passed on to the husband, the slightest change in the attitude of the in-laws towards him will also trigger the husband's speculation, and if these words reach the husband, he will feel that he is an outsider, and the wife is not at odds with him, leading to a rift in the trust and dependence between the husband and wife.
As a result, this marriage becomes precarious.
Imagine if the husband returned to his mother-in-law's house to complain, resulting in dissatisfaction with his daughter-in-law. As a daughter-in-law, she will definitely have a big fight with her husband and even have an argument with her in-laws. Therefore, it is necessary to allow the daughter to go home and confide in her, causing conflicts between the parents and the husband and causing discord in the family.
A wise woman would never do that. Even when major issues of principle are involved, they resolve them independently without disturbing the peace of their parents. It doesn't matter if it's painful or not, unless they need help.
A 40-year-old middle-aged woman is no longer emotional or vulnerable. They have experienced the ups and downs of life, and have seen through gains and losses and human nature.
As a result, they have a set of principles that suit their lifestyle, with a wealth of experience and means to treat their husbands, children, and even the entire family. They know how to make sure they are not bullied, their well-being is not affected, and their families are not disturbed.
They seem to be good at everything, because not everyone needs to think about it in the minds of these women