01
Recently, I came across a video that made me fully realize how terrible the dark side of human nature is.
A girl has an expensive and very beautiful fur coat.
She chose to wash the coat on a sunny day and take it outside to dry in a sunny place.
Who knows, when she went to get it back, she found that someone had cut a big hole in her clothes for no reason!
She didn't see who cut it, and she didn't know why the other person had cut a cut in her fur.
She wondered why all the other clothes were fine, why everyone else's was fine, only her fur coat was cut?
In fact, this is just one of the most common dark sides of human nature - jealousy.
Sometimes, jealousy is unprovoked and unfounded.
In the book "Malice", it is said that some people's hatred has no reason, they are mediocre, they have no talent, and they do nothing, so your excellence, your talent, kindness and happiness are all original sin.
02
- How uncomfortable is jealousy from loved ones?
In the comment section of the blogger's video of himself "his fur coat was cut with a big hole", I saw too many unbelievable things that resembled unspeakable jealousy from the depths of my heart.
A netizen said that they moved to a new house to do housewarming, but the new sofa was burned with a cigarette butt.
Ordinary people move to drink and invite relatives and friends, but such "relatives and friends" deliberately burn your sofa with cigarette butts. Who is not uncomfortable?
Some kind-hearted people may even wonder themselves, "Why did my relatives do this? What did I do wrong?"
Another netizen said that when their family moved in, her friend called her boyfriend at her new home and cried poor.
Another netizen happily picked up his first new car and took the whole family for a ride, and the uncle who sat in the co-pilot attracted a big hole in the seat.
Netizens thought that the uncle was careless, who knew that when he bought a second car and took the uncle out, the same position was burned by the smoking uncle and a hole.
Maybe the first time the uncle may indeed be careless, but the same thing happens the second time, who will believe it or be careless?
There is also a girl who wears a mink coat that her husband bought for her to go to a girlfriends' party. Her best friend, who grew up with her in preschool, seemed to have accidentally rubbed her back several times with a lit cigarette in her hand, but fortunately her husband reached out to help her block it several times to avoid the fate of her coat being burned.
In the comment area of the video's 21,000 messages, there are many things like this, whether it is friends or relatives around them, many people are extremely jealous.
Just as one person in the comment section said, "If you don't see you, it's often the people around you", most of the time, a person will not be jealous of a rich man with a lot of money, just like a beggar will only be jealous of another beggar.
People are often jealous of those around them who are a little better off than themselves, but who are themselves similar to us.
They see that you have something good, and they will have an irrepressible jealousy in their hearts, but they don't have the ability to surpass you or become better than you in a short period of time, so they can only secretly poke and poke badly.
When you meet such a person, you can only pay more attention to it in your life, and once you find that you have friends around you who have such a mentality, you must stay away and don't make deep friends.
03
- How terrible is a person's jealousy?
Everyone is familiar with the "Zhu Ling case".
The beginning of the story is just a female student with a good background but average talent, jealous of a person who is not as good as herself, but her looks and talents are better than herself.
So, a high-achieving student in his prime and a beautiful and kind female college student were poisoned to death because of the jealousy of their roommates.
Many times, talented people are often more dangerous than those who don't: they can easily become the object of envy.
The people who are jealous of them are often the people around them, and the consequences of jealousy are often difficult to bear.
For a while, there was such a post that caused a heated discussion on the whole network: a girl reported her best friend who violated the rules in the graduate school entrance examination.
The girl's family background is not as good as her best friend, she is not as good-looking as her best friend, and she is not as good as her best friend in college, the key is that she is not as motivated as her best friend. In short, it is a girl whose talent and hard work are not as good as her best friend, and she has been pressed by her best friend.
In daily life, on the one hand, she hopes that her girlfriends will not have a bad life, and on the other hand, she does not like her girlfriends to live too well.
My best friend was admitted to a top985 university for the second time, because she was too nervous, after the bell rang for a certain exam, she didn't stop writing and wrote a little more until the teacher came to collect the test papers.
After the girlfriend's exam, she told the girl about it, and then the girl did something unexpected: she reported her girlfriend.
The consequence is that she successfully reported it, and her best friend's graduate school entrance examination results were canceled!
The girl said she regretted it after reporting it, and her parents also scolded her, and she didn't know what to do.
Obviously, the best friend's life was ruined by this girl to a certain extent: the best friend is the second graduate school entrance examination, and after the results are canceled, there is a high probability that it will take two or three years before the retake, and at that time, will the best friend still have the time and energy to retake the exam?
The most important thing is that the best friend's life plan has been completely disrupted.
Faced with such a result, the girl just said: I was too afraid that my girlfriend would be admitted. Now that my girlfriend is like this, I really regret it, it's really uncomfortable.
Just because of a small jealousy, she ruined her best friend's life, how creepy is this girl's jealousy?
Usually, this best friend seems to be a bosom friend, but the malice that accumulates in her heart destroys a person when she doesn't expect it.
Whether it is "a girl reports her best friend's violation of the postgraduate entrance examination" or "Zhu Ling's case", the dark side of human nature is exposed behind it: You can live happily, but you can't live happier than me. You can succeed, but you can't succeed more than me!
Aristotle said, "The jealous man suffers because it is not only his own failures and setbacks that afflict him, but also the successes of others." ”
Just like many people occasionally joke that their own failures are certainly acceptable, but the success of colleagues, friends, and relatives is even more envious.
Human nature is like this: I hate you for being poor, I am afraid that you are rich, I hate you for having it, and I laugh at you for not having it.
04
- Never underestimate people's jealousy.
Keigo Higashino's novel "Malice" also has a story about a tragedy caused by jealousy between friends.
The man named "Noguchi" in the novel is a very jealous villain, and his friend Hidaka often helps him, but he is never grateful, but instead jealous of Hidaka's thriving career.
Later, Noguchi got cancer, but his friend Hidaka became a best-selling author, and Noguchi, who had nothing to do and was terminally ill, finally brutally murdered his friend Hidaka under growing hatred and jealousy.
After reading this story, I understood the sentence "jealousy makes others and oneself lose both".
Jealousy is like a demon to some people, who destroys not only himself, but also others.
The person who is envied is just because of his own excellence, so he attracts the darkness of human nature, isn't it a misfortune?
However, in life, some small malice or jealousy may not bring you great harm but make people feel resigned.
"The people who praise you are always concerned about the excitement that is not far away, and the people who are really close never appear. ”
"My son's full moon wine was deducted from his back, and now he is three or four years old and still has a scar. ”
"I brought my mother's handmade bolognese to share with my roommates, but she smeared the oil from the bolognese on my snow boots while I wasn't there. ”
"I passed the exam, and my girlfriend of 10 years wished me to be on the list, and she said that I would be able to accompany her. ”
The very cool ending is that the girl chose to break up with her best friend, and of course she successfully went ashore.
The jealousy and malice of her best friend did not hurt her because of this.
So, what do we do in the face of one's jealousy?
First, stay away from them.
If you find someone around you who has a faint jealousy of you, occasionally expresses envy and jealousy of your life, or always jokingly expresses her jealousy, then quickly stay away from such people.
For jealous people, you can only make friends in general, not in depth.
Remember, never associate with someone who is jealous of you, it will hurt you.
Second, don't reveal your wealth and don't easily disclose your private secrets to others.
Many people's jealousy stems from dissatisfaction with themselves.
For example, if you have a bad background, no money, are not good enough, and have a bad career, such people will often be jealous of those around you who are better than you.
So if you buy a house and a car, if you get a promotion and a raise, celebrate secretly, or only with the people you trust and are closest to.
Don't show off your wealth to those who don't live well, maybe your success is more than his failure, and your happiness will only make him more pitiful.
If he lives in such an environment for a long time, he tends to become more inferior, and low self-esteem leads to more jealousy, and perhaps the consequences are immeasurable,
Third, if you are strong enough, you can completely shield his people from jealousy.
Just as a beggar will not envy a millionaire, if you are good enough, the malice or jealousy of those around you who are not as good as you will not affect you at all.
So, try to be strong and stay away from jealous people.