Mr. Sun is what his parents call "someone else's child", no, even if he is a "child of someone else's family", he can't reach Mr. Sun's achievements when he was a teenager, his talent is too high, and it is not an exaggeration to describe it with the word "genius".
But this is such a talented high-achieving student, but on the other side of the ocean, in the United States, living without a fixed place to live, hungry life, wandering for 16 years, before the age of 55, has gray hair, tooth loss, health worry, showing a picture of the state of the lowest people in society.
Mr. Sun's experience made me more agree with the saying, "IQ determines the upper limit, and EQ determines the lower limit".
In 1969, Mr. Sun was born in Jiangyin City, Jiangsu Province; in 1984, Mr. Sun was admitted to the best local high school, and obtained excellent scores in four of the six courses in a mid-term examination, and his extremely high IQ made Mr. Sun have no bias in the subject, and can be called a hexagonal all-round warrior; in 1985, Mr. Sun was admitted to the junior class of Fudan University, majoring in physics, when he was not yet 16 years old.
During his studies at Fudan University, Mr. Sun continued to develop his talents, even in the youth class surrounded by talents, and after graduating from his bachelor's degree, Mr. Sun received the Lee Tsung-Dao Scholarship to study in the United States.
After coming to the United States to study, Mr. Sun not only obtained a Ph.D., but also made some achievements in academic research, publishing more than 30 papers in English between 1992 and 1999, many of which were published in the journal of Nuclear Physics SCI.
I don't know if you have watched the American drama "The Big Bang Theory", I once suspected that the prototype of the genius physicist Sheldon in the play was Mr. Sun.
After graduating, Mr. Sun did not choose his old career in physics, but entered the computer field across industries. With the attributes of an all-round warrior full of talent, Mr. Sun successfully found a job on Wall Street as a programmer, earning an annual salary of more than $100,000 a year. You must know that this is in the 90s of the last century, and the monthly salary of domestic senior engineers is only a few thousand yuan.
The U.S. is highly attractive to global talents, and is also willing to accept foreign high-end talents, Mr. Sun first obtained a green card, and then successfully became a U.S. citizen.
With a high IQ, Mr. Sun almost never encountered any setbacks in his youth, and any of his achievements were beyond the reach of ordinary people in a lifetime. What is certain is that no matter whether he chooses to stay in the United States or return to China for development, whether he continues to engage in physics research or deeply cultivates the computer field or enters the development of other industries, his excellent talent and IQ are destined to have a very high ceiling, or even no limit at all.
However, the emotional setback changed Mr. Sun's fate, and the lower limit replaced the upper limit to determine Mr. Sun's future situation.
In the 90s of the last century, Mr. Sun met a divorced Chinese woman with a baby in New York, who was very kind to Mr. Sun, and the two slowly developed feelings and eventually tied the knot. originally thought that Mr. Sun would reach a new level after a bumper harvest of career and love, but he didn't expect that the woman would divorce Mr. Sun after getting a green card through marriage.
Frustrated, Mr. Sun suffered from depression, began to have auditory hallucinations, could not distinguish between reality and fiction, and finally became a homeless man, living a life of homelessness and wandering since 2007, begging and picking up food discarded by others, which has been 17 years now.
Can you imagine that a Ph.D. from a top American university with a very high IQ has to live on handouts, and when it's cold, he can only hide in the subway station to rub the heat, and when he is sick, he can't even afford to go to the hospital? This happened to Mr. Sun, and the reason for this may be related to Mr. Sun's emotional intelligence.
Encountering a compatriot who cared about him in a foreign country made Mr. Sun relax his vigilance and ignore the true purpose of those who took the initiative to approach. From the deep devastation after the divorce, it can be seen that Mr. Sun never suspected that his ex-wife married him, but just wanted to use his Chinese American status to get a green card, how naïve and innocent is this?
Generally speaking, it is easy to hide the purpose when falling in love, and after getting married and living together, it can be more or less detected, and although the other party will be sad and unwilling to suffer a thunderous blow after a showdown, only people with low emotional intelligence may not be able to see anything, and they will be completely manipulated.
In addition, even if most people experience a failed marriage or romance, it is impossible for them not to get out for a long time, let alone have an immeasurable impact on their life and work, and they will fall directly from the pride of the sky to the lowest level of the homeless. But Mr. Sun's emotions have serious problems, and his lack of emotional intelligence makes him unable to self-regulate, so he can only cope by giving up on himself and avoiding reality.
Therefore, it is no exaggeration to say that low EQ ruined Mr. Sun, making his high IQ a foil, and his talent was "sealed" from the day of divorce.
Fortunately, Mr. Sun's experience has attracted widespread attention after it was posted on the Internet, and Fudan alumni in the United States have taken action, believing that Mr. Sun's basic living needs in the future can be guaranteed, and he is more likely to return to China to start a new life with the help of alumni. There are just two things to think about.
First, if Mr. Sun does not have the title of Fudan Ph.D. in the United States or the Internet is not well developed, then Mr. Sun will continue to wander in the United States, and the worst outcome is that one day he freezes to death or dies of illness on the streets of a foreign country.
Second, after his living conditions improve, will Mr. Sun fall into a new crisis again due to his low emotional intelligence, for example, after returning to China, he will have conflicts with relatives and friends, and he will not be able to adapt to the environment after finding a job to earn a living. These are not impossible to happen.
We can only wish Mr. Sun good luck and hope that his emotional intelligence and ability to face setbacks will grow after 16 years of difficult life.
People's IQ is almost only related to talent, and it is difficult to improve through acquired efforts, so the upper limit of life is given by God. Emotional intelligence is different, can be constantly improved in the grinding, and emotional intelligence determines the lower limit of life, high emotional intelligence people are often not too bad, we often see that people around them are not necessarily very smart but can properly handle all kinds of interpersonal relationships, not easy to be defeated by difficulties, this is a typical embodiment of high emotional intelligence.
Since you can't change the upper limit, let's raise the lower limit and try to make emotional intelligence play a bigger role.