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When I was a child, I went out to play and my hands were cut by bamboo, and I couldn't stop bleeding, and my friends said that blood can't be eaten by ants, it will mutate, so I dripped blood on the sand, and they stirred wildly, but fortunately, their own coagulation function is relatively strong, otherwise they will lose too much blood and burp fart
Take my dog to the river to poke the beecomb, the dog ran, I didn't run, the bee chased the dog, and when the dog came back and stabbed, I didn't hold back and ran with the dog, but the two-legged one couldn't run on four legs, and ,,, swore that he would never take the dog to the beecomb again
I followed my brother to the top of the 9th floor, stepped on the iron sheet on the roof of the attic connecting the two buildings from Building A to Building B and then went downstairs, I didn't dare to think about the consequences of slipping and rolling down
I secretly ate an effervescent tablet, but the teacher asked me to get up and answer the question, and the effervescent tablet had already bubbled in my mouth, pretending to be a sheep seizure
I ruined my aunt's laptop with urine, used my mother's big-name lipstick as crayons to paint, broke off a few eyebrow pencils, used her imported perfume to do handicrafts, and blew the biyun set as a balloon...
Now I don't drink alcohol because when I was a child, I secretly drank swill, and the taste of alcohol was the same as the swill fed to pigs
My mom said that if I swallowed gum, I would die, and once I swallowed a gum and thought I was going to die, so I lay on the bed and waited quietly to die with tears in my eyes, and waited until I fell asleep, and when I woke up the next day, I ran to my mom in amazement and excitement and said, "I'm not dead." ”
When I was a child, my sister lied to me that my green coat was an invisibility cloak, and the next day I wore a green coat to go to kindergarten, swaggered into the men's bathroom, and compared my middle finger in front of the teacher
When I was a child, I went to catch tadpoles in big puddles and carried them home in cans and bottles, but then my belly was white and I was about to die, so I dumped them down the drain. One day my mother was washing vegetables in the pool when she screamed, and a big toad jumped out of the pool
When I went back to my grandparents' house for the Chinese New Year, there was a soil kang in the countryside, my grandfather sat on the kang head and leaned against the quilt, I stepped on the windowsill and climbed on the quilt stack to ride to my grandfather's neck to pee, grandpa was very happy at first I was close to him, and then I couldn't laugh, and my mother pulled me over for a "love education"
When I was in elementary school, I pulled in the toilet with the teacher, and I accidentally saw her pull a huge thickness, and when I went back, I said at the same table, I was embarrassed to say it, and I wrote on the table with a pencil, but the teacher in the class saw it and asked us what we were writing...
When I was a child, I wanted to try what it was like to climb down the stairs, so I cut the curtains into one by one, and then I dropped them from the upper floor and climbed down, and when I climbed to the third floor, I found that I had miscalculated, the rope was not long enough, and then I was hung in the air and swayed in the wind
When my cousin was a child, she went out to play with her classmates, picked up the kind of small card that people threw on the ground, showed it to her mother, got married and was beaten, and asked her why, she said that the sister above was very good-looking...
When I was a child Chinese New Year's Eve I had dinner at my grandmother's house, and before I ate dumplings, I sneaked to my uncle's house, and together with my sister I found a 100 whip and put it in the stove, and I heard a sound of the stove blowing up, and the chimneys came down, Chinese New Year's Eve and my uncle was responsible for re-extinguishing the fire, setting up the stove, and tidying up the chimneys at home
When my brother was three or four years old, he climbed on the roof, peeled off the tiles of the tiled house, and smashed the big iron pot of my grandmother along the chimney, and directly made a big hole in the house, and I didn't see him for a few months, and my father beat him for a long time, and he knelt in the yard for a long time...
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