Originally, I was a girl who was full of fantasies about marriage, thinking that once I found the perfect match, I would live a happy life. However, it all turned upside down after I found out that my husband was cheating.
That day, I came home from work early to surprise my husband. However, when I opened the door, I saw the scene of him making out with another woman. I was stunned on the spot, and my heart was like a knife. All the good things I had been expecting turned ridiculous in an instant.
But his words have lost their convincingness. The happiness of the family became illusory in an instant, and I could hardly believe that everything between us was an illusion. At that moment, I realized that I had fallen into a quagmire from which I could not extricate myself.
After a painful struggle, I decided to leave this cheating marriage. However, that decision led to another painful ordeal for me. My husband completely lost his mind, and he found all kinds of ways to stop me. The most cruel of them all was the night after I filed for divorce.
I got home, packed my bags and prepared to leave, but he forced me to question me for a night. He used every means to threaten, plead, plead, and even use his hands to smash my face to pieces.
"I smashed your face because you made me lose face, you know? You know?" he said with maddened ferocity.
That night, I struggled to escape this terrible nightmare, hoping to escape this broken marriage. My face was so swollen and bleeding from his hands that he was bleeding from him, but his attitude was unusually cold, as if everything was just my own doing.
When I was unable to fight back, I had no choice but to leave first. Looking at my embarrassed self, I realized that leaving was the only way out. However, his desperate eyes haunted me and I couldn't let go. My face is all smashed, how can I go out?
The person who has arranged the next step of life for someone to carry the weight, the real destiny of the person is ourselves after all.
Leaving that marriage gave me courage and strength, but the shadow it brought with it haunted me. My face healed with a deep scar that reminded me of my cowardice and helplessness. I started to rebuild my life, working hard and trying to become more independent and strong.
I didn't tell anyone the real reason for my divorce, including my parents. They are an old husband and wife, who love me deeply, for fear that I will have a trace of grievance. I don't want them to worry about what happened to me, and I don't want them to worry about my marriage on the spur of the moment.
However, a new contradiction quietly arose at a family dinner. I saw a hint of dissatisfaction and worry on my mother's face. With my resolute attitude of not talking about marriage, she always looked at me with reluctance and doubt, as if looking for the hidden pain in my heart.
That night, I couldn't help but open my mouth and tell my parents everything that happened between me and my ex-husband. I have never seen my father so angry, and he was so indignant at my ex-husband's behavior that he wanted to come to the door and get justice himself. My mother's expression was very complicated, ranging from distress and guilt for what happened to me, as well as helplessness and worry about what I had endured privately.
"Son, did you get divorced because you were not doing well?" my mother asked me suspiciously.
I looked at her complicated expression, and my heart was mixed. Yes, it's true that I'm having a bad time, but I don't want them to worry. I don't want them to dwell on what I've been through, because I'm good enough for me.
"Mom, I'm doing well, really. I forced a smile.
However, there is another conflict that will affect my relationship with my parents. Although they love me deeply, I am their child after all, and they will endure any pain and be willing to take any responsibility in order to avoid the slightest grievance.
Soon, I left that family full of pain. I moved to a new city looking for a new job and life. But deep down in my heart, my latent hurt couldn't go away. Every time I saw the face in the mirror that was beaten beyond recognition, the pain in my heart was like a knife.
However, just when I thought I could start a new life, a phone call pulled me back to the nightmare of the past.
"Hey, it's me, you know what? You're losing face by leaving! Are you trying to make me have nothing?" his angry voice came from the other end of the line. I felt a panic. The silence on the other end of my line must have angered him.
"Are you embarrassed to call?" I tried to keep my composure, but the fear in my heart could not be contained. His phone call made me suddenly realize that I had not escaped his fate.
"Keep me out, leave, you think you can escape, your face has been left in this life, this life, wherever you go, I will find you!" his words were mad and threatening. I felt a shudder. I was scared, really scared. I don't know what he's going to do.
In the days that followed, I began to search the corners of the city for places to hide. I became vigilant and sensitive, and life was full of fear, especially at night. I began to doubt everyone's gaze, afraid to find out that someone he had sent was secretly watching. My life can no longer be as normal as it used to be, because fear has permeated every corner of my life.
Although I was forced to survive and continue to live a normal life on the surface, I was deeply in despair and fear. My face was all smashed, so why did I get out of the house?, and I didn't know how long I could last.
Soon, I realized that I needed help and support. I was traumatized, with no family to rely on, and my friends couldn't give me enough support. There is nowhere to dock my broken ship, no one to share the pain within. My departure did not bring inner relief, but made this already broken family even more unbearable. I knew I couldn't go on like this, I had to face it.
Luckily, when I was at my most helpless, I was helped by a relative I didn't know well. His surname is Yang, a distant cousin of my mother's generation, and he is kind-hearted and gives me great encouragement. With his company and encouragement, I began to gradually face my life bravely.
However, just as I was starting to regain my spirits and prepare to start a new life, I was struck down again by my ex-husband's madness.
On a sunny morning, I received news that shocked me. It turned out that my ex-husband concocted a lie to the outside world, claiming that I left him because I betrayed the family and cheated. This slander spread all at once, and I became the focus of everyone's discussion for a while. I felt angry and hopeless.
Why did he do this, why did he refuse to let me go and let me start a new life in peace? This kind of false accusation not only hurt my reputation, but also caused me to lose people's trust in me. It left me in deep despair and fear, and I didn't know how far I could go.
Soon, my cousin surnamed Yang reappeared in my life, and he gave me comfort and support. He told me not to care about what the outside world thinks, and he said that as long as we are firm in our hearts, nothing can defeat us. I began to think that maybe I could really start over.