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My name is Li Qiang, and I am an ordinary migrant worker, but my life has changed dramatically since my wife's mother, who is my mother-in-law, moved into our house. The mother-in-law's name is Wang Xiuying, a typical traditional Chinese woman, and her words always reveal an undeniable majesty. And the source of all this is because of a sudden urban renewal plan.
"Qiangqiang, my mother is going to come and live for a while. My wife, Xiaomin, suddenly said to me one night that I was looking at my phone and answered absentmindedly.
"Why?" I asked casually.
"She wants to come over and supervise the demolition money. Xiao Min said as she cleaned up the utensils on the table.
I've heard about it. This area of our house needs to be renovated in an urban area, and the government has given a lot of compensation for the demolition. Xiaomin and I have an old house of 70 square meters, and according to the compensation standard, the money we get is enough for us to change to a big house in the suburbs.
"How long is she going to live?" I felt a little uncomfortable, although my relationship with my mother-in-law was not bad, but living under the same roof for a long time was always a trouble.
"It's not clear yet, let's see the progress of the demolition. Xiao Min also seemed to be a little embarrassed.
In this way, a week later, Wang Xiuying moved in with a large bag. Her arrival immediately changed the atmosphere of our home. She always chattered about the demolition, and often pointed fingers, saying that this is not good, and that is not good.
"Qiangqiang, do you know? Now these demolition funds are a big deal, and they have to be handled carefully. That's what she said to me at dinner on the first day.
I nodded, trying to be polite.
"You young people don't understand, I'll have to keep an eye on this. She continued.
I smiled helplessly and didn't say anything more.
A few days later, my brother Li Gang came to visit my house. Li Gang is a straightforward person, and as soon as he came, he went straight to the point: "Qiang Qiang, how to arrange the matter of this demolition money? I heard that your mother-in-law also came." ”
"Hey, she's in charge, and I don't know. "I spread my hands.
"Be careful, it's easy to get into conflicts. Li Gang said worriedly.
I know he's telling the truth. Family ethics in China are complex, and when it comes to money, it is easy to disagree.
Soon, Xiao Min's younger brother, my brother-in-law Xiao Ming, also intervened. Xiao Ming is a typical idle young man, who has nothing to do on weekdays, and as soon as he heard about the demolition money, he immediately ran in a hurry.
"Brother, how will this demolition money be distributed? I think I should also have a share. Xiao Ming began to ask as soon as he entered the door.
Xiao Min and I looked at each other, but neither immediately answered. This thing is indeed tricky, according to Chinese Xi, home
The financial transactions between the members of the Tribunal are always complex and delicate.
"This ...... We haven't decided yet. I tried my best to keep my tone calm.
Xiao Ming was obviously not satisfied with this answer, but he didn't say much, just sat on the sofa and mixed in a few words from time to time.
The mother-in-law's attitude towards Xiao Ming is obviously not as good as that of me and Xiao Min, she always says a few perfunctory words, and then takes care of her.
As time went on, the atmosphere at home became more and more tense. I'm starting to feel that it's not just about the distribution of money, it's more about power and control. Wang Xiuying seems to want to fully control the distribution of the demolition money, while Xiao Ming wants a piece of the pie.
One night, Xiao Min suddenly said to me: "Qiangqiang, my mother is ...... She wants most of the money for the demolition. ”
I was a little shocked: "Why? This doesn't make sense." ”
She said that we are young people and have more opportunities to earn money in the future, while she is old and needs more security. Xiao Min's tone was helpless.
I was a little unhappy: "But this is our house, and we should have a bigger say." ”
Xiao Min sighed: "I don't know what to do, I don't want to fall out with my mother." ”
This is something that I find very tricky. In Chinese families, respecting the elderly and caring for the young is a basic ethical morality. But that doesn't mean we should sacrifice our interests.
A few days later, a good friend of mine, Zhang Wei, came to my house to play. Zhang Wei is a lawyer who has studied this type of family dispute. I told him about the situation.
"This kind of thing has to be handled with care. Zhang Wei sat down on the sofa and said slowly, "First of all, you have to clarify the legal ownership of the demolition money, and then talk about the distribution." ”
I nodded in agreement.
"Secondly, there must be a clear communication within your family. In this kind of thing, poor communication can easily create estrangement. Zhang Wei continued.
I think he has a lot of point. But the problem is that now the atmosphere at home has started to get tense.
Over the next few days, the atmosphere at home became more and more depressing. Wang Xiuying always talked about the demolition money in front of Xiao Min, and Xiao Min seemed more and more irritable. Xiao Ming occasionally interjects, but most of the time, he is just a bystander.
Finally, one night, things broke out. Our family was sitting around the living room, and Wang Xiuying suddenly offered to use most of the demolition money to buy a new house, and the rest to me and Xiaomin.
"How is this possible?" I couldn't help but retort, "this is our house, and we should have more power to decide." ”
Wang Xiuying's face suddenly sank: "You are an outsider, you had better not interfere in these things." ”
I felt a wave of anger, but tried to stay calm: "We are a family and should be treated equally. ”
Xiao Ming also interjected at this time
"Yes, Mom, it's unfair for you to distribute it like this. I should have a share of it, too. ”
Wang Xiuying glared at Xiao Ming: "You, what contributions have you made in the past few years? ”
Xiao Ming's face suddenly became ugly, his lips moved slightly, but he didn't speak again.
Xiao Min finally couldn't help it at this time: "Mom, this can't work." This is Qiangqiang and my house, and we have the right to decide how to distribute it. ”
Wang Xiuying looked at Xiao Min, and a trace of disappointment flashed in her eyes: "I'm doing it for your good." You're so young and don't know what to do with so much money. ”
The atmosphere became even more tense. I knew that someone needed to come out and calm down at this time: "Let's all calm down. We can discuss this issue slowly. ”
But Wang Xiuying was obviously angry: "There is nothing to discuss, I have already decided." ”
I looked at Xiao Min, her eyes full of helplessness.
That night, we didn't say anything more. But this thing is like a time bomb that could explode at any time.
The next day, I decided to talk to Zhang Wei again. I told him the details of the situation at home.
After hearing this, Zhang Wei pondered for a while: "This kind of family dispute is very common. It's all about communication. You need to find a good time to sit down and talk. Everyone expresses their ideas and then looks for a mutually acceptable solution. ”
His words gave me some ideas. I know it's not easy, but I have to give it a try.
When I got home, I suggested that the whole family sit down and talk about it. Xiao Min and Xiao Ming both agreed, but Wang Xiuying looked a little reluctant.
We sat around the dinner table, and the atmosphere was still a little tense.
I spoke, "Mom, we know you're doing it for our good, but we also have our own ideas. This is a matter of our future, and we want you to hear from us. ”
Wang Xiuying frowned: "I'll listen." ”
Xiao Min then said, "Mom, this is our house, and we should have the right to take the lead. We're willing to give you a part, but not too much. ”
Wang Xiuying said dissatisfiedly: "Then how much do you plan to give me?"
I replied, "We can divide the demolition money into three parts, you take one share, and we will handle the rest." ”
Wang Xiuying was obviously not satisfied: "Only one, how can I use it alone?"
Xiao Ming also interjected at this time: "I think I should also have a share, after all, I am also a member of the family." ”
The atmosphere became tense again. I tried to stay calm: "We're all a family, we need to find a solution that is acceptable to everyone." ”
Wang Xiuying snorted coldly: "You guys are forcing me." ”
Xiao Min looked at her mother, her eyes full of pleading: "Mom, please understand us." ”
Wang Xiuying was silent for a while, and then said slowly: "I need time to think about it." ”
That night, Wang Xiuying did not speak again. The whole house was filled with a dreary atmosphere. I know it's far from over, but at least we're starting to try to communicate.
A few days later, Wang Xiuying finally spoke. Her attitude seemed to have softened a little: "I think a lot, we are a family, and we shouldn't be unhappy because of money." But I also have my thoughts. ”
Xiao Min quickly answered: "Mom, we are all willing to listen to your opinion." ”
Wang Xiuying took a deep breath: "I know I can't take too much, but I hope to have enough money to protect my old age." I want a third, and the rest is up to you. ”
Min and I looked at each other and were a little surprised, but it was better than we expected.
Xiao Ming was obviously dissatisfied with this result: "What about me? I have nothing?"
Wang Xiuying looked at him coldly: "You should make money yourself, not rely on others." ”
Xiao Ming stood up angrily: "Then why should I waste time here!"
He angrily left the table, and the atmosphere became awkward again. I felt a bit of a headache, and family harmony still seemed difficult to maintain.
For the next few days, Xiao Ming barely returned home. Xiao Min and I are also trying to digest this sudden decision. Although Wang Xiuying's proposal is more reasonable, Xiao Ming's attitude still worries us.
One night, Xiao Min and I were in the living room talking about the demolition money, and Wang Xiuying suddenly walked in.
"I want to tell you about Xiao Ming. There was a hint of weariness in her tone.
We immediately stopped talking and turned our attention to her.
"I know Xiao Ming is not a worry-free child, but he is my son after all. I want to give him some money as his share. Wang Xiuying said slowly.
Xiao Min and I looked at each other, a little surprised. Xiao Min said slowly: "Mom, this is your decision, we respect it." ”
Wang Xiuying nodded: "Yes, I think this is good for everyone." ”
While this decision has eased the situation somewhat, we all know that this is far from over. The distribution of the demolition money is only the beginning, and the relationship and communication between family members is the bigger challenge.
As the demolition process progressed, we started thinking about the new house. Xiao Min and I are thinking about our future family plans and hope to buy a bigger house. Wang Xiuying also expressed some thoughts on the new home.
"I wanted to have a quiet environment, preferably with a garden. Wang Xiuying said.
We started looking online and with real estate agents for the right listing. In this process, we try to consider everyone's needs as much as possible, hoping to find a place that everyone is happy with.
Eventually, we found a house that met our expectations. It is located on the outskirts of the city, in a pleasant setting, with a small garden and large enough for our needs.
On the day of the viewing, we went together as a family. When Wang Xiuying saw the garden, her face showed a long-lost look
Smile. She walked through the garden, caressing each plant, her eyes sparkling with satisfaction and relief. Xiao Min held my hand tightly, and the same light flashed in her eyes. At that moment, I felt the family harmony that I had not felt for a long time.
"This garden is so nice, I can grow some vegetables and flowers here. Wang Xiuying turned to us and said, her voice full of anticipation.
I nodded, "Yes, Mom, it's a good place for you." ”
Xiao Min also smiled: "Mom, you will like it." ”
And just like that, we decided to buy the house. Although the distribution of the demolition money was somewhat complicated, it was finally agreed upon by everyone's efforts. We divided the money into three parts, Wang Xiuying took one share, Xiao Ming also got his fair share, and Xiao Min and I handled the rest.
The day we moved into our new home, our whole family was filled with anticipation and joy. Wang Xiuying was busy decorating her room and garden, while Xiao Min began to plan our living space. I'm thinking about how I can better manage my new home.
However, the good times did not last long, and the problem arose again. After Xiao Ming got the money, he began to become more indulgent. He went out a lot, didn't return at night, and even began to get involved in gambling.
Wang Xiuying was very worried about this, and she found me and Xiao Min, hoping that we could help persuade Xiao Ming.
"He can't go on like this, I'm afraid he's going to go down the wrong path. Wang Xiuying said anxiously.
Xiao Min and I also had headaches. Xiao Ming's problem does need to be solved, but we don't know where to start.
One night, Xiao Ming came back drunk again. I decided to have a good talk with him.
"Xiao Ming, it's not right for you to do this, you should plan your future well. I tried my best to keep my tone calm.
Xiao Ming said mockingly: "Brother, what do you know? I have money now, and I can spend it as much as I want." ”
I was a little disappointed: "But it's not a long-term solution, you need to take responsibility for your own future." ”
Xiao Ming didn't answer, just shook his head and walked into his room.
In the next few days, Xiao Ming's behavior did not change. After discussing with Xiao Min, I decided to find a professional psychological counselor to help Xiao Ming.
We reached out to an experienced counselor who had a few in-depth conversations with Ming. After a period of hard work, Xiao Ming finally began to realize his problem.
He began to go out less and stopped gambling. Wang Xiuying's eyes were full of gratitude when she saw all this.
Over time, the atmosphere in our house gradually returned to calm. Xiao Ming is also trying to change himself and begins to think about his future and career plans.
Xiao Min and I continue to take care of our new home, trying to create a warm and harmonious family environment.
This series of events made me deeply realize that family is not only made up of blood relations.
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