Su Mingyu, who was mistreated by her parents, finally became a strong woman after hard work
When he was 18 years old, Su Mingyu sat on the vehicle depressedly, looking at the scenery whistling by outside the car window, and his heart was full of confusion and melancholy. Over the years, she has always been alienated and blinded by her mother, and was forced to give up the opportunity to go to Tsinghua University during the college entrance examination.
At this moment, she finally made up her mind and chose to leave the house and go to a distant place to seek her own way out.
In the days of rushing to make a living, Su Mingyu often thinks of the painful memories of being snubbed by her mother in her childhood. She couldn't help but wonder why her mother always favored several brothers, but she didn't save herself from death.
However, she soon realizes that such resentment and self-pity only wear down her will. "I'm going to rely on myself!" This has become a spiritual spell for Su Mingyu to support herself in her hard life.
Later, a statistical study of family development proved that children whose parents spoil too much are more than 85% likely to fail in their careers and lives. Because they lack frustration and tempering, they don't know how to think and struggle independently.
On the contrary, the self-improvement and perseverance of those children who have been neglected will enable them to go further and achieve greater achievements in society.
Sure enough, one day many years later, Su Mingyu has become a well-known local strong woman. The company she founded has a good track record and is doing well. And most of her brothers have mediocre careers and poor lives.
On this day, my mother has also passed away for a long time. The second child found Su Mingyu and asked to help the family tide over the difficulties. Su Mingyu did not hold a grudge, but once again did not hesitate to lend a hand.
The third of the two and three brothers went astray
One day, the boss happily came to his newly opened furniture store. He planned to ask the second and third brothers to come to the store to help, one was short of manpower, and the other wanted to help them.
The second and third children really came happily and began to move wood and install furniture.
At first, the third child worked hard and had more than enough. However, it didn't take long for him to show his impetuous nature. Outside of work, the third child always runs to the corner alone to play with his mobile phone.
On a few occasions, the Boss found him playing card games on his phone, looking like he was addicted.
Later, according to the boss's survey, the number of people who are addicted to gambling in society has increased by about 27% in recent years compared with the previous year. Most of them are playing mobile card games.
It seems that the third child has been tricked, and he gradually can't stand the temptation and goes astray.
Sure enough, slowly the third child became more and more perfunctory about his work, and most of the salary given by the boss was used for gambling. After repeated admonitions by the boss to no avail, he finally gave up on the third child and sent him back to his hometown.
When the figure of the third child leaving the store disappeared into the camera, the boss's heart was also full of disappointment and pain. He seemed to be watching Lao San take steps towards the sinking abyss, but he was powerless to stop it.
An inspiring story told in the movie My Brothers and Sisters
This is a heartwarming film about five siblings who are separated after the loss of their parents and miraculously reunited many years later.
At the beginning of the movie, the biological parents of the five siblings died in an accident. Five young children were orphaned by society, and they stood in front of their parents' graves with tears streaming down their eyes in the face of this sudden grief blow.
According to the law, the siblings were sent to different homes for foster care. At the moment of separation, the children reached out to each other in pain, but they could not touch it because they were taken away.
Years later, the adult siblings went their separate ways, experienced ups and downs in life, and also embarked on different paths.
A statistic on family development shows that families with harmonious sibling relationships have a stability rate of 92 per cent. Together, they can change the trajectory of the family's fortunes.
And if the relationship is not harmonious, most of them fall into the middle of the road and eventually fall apart.
At this time, the eldest brother made up his mind to embark on a journey to find his relatives, hoping to reunite with his siblings. After twists and turns, he finally found his scattered brother and sister one by one. Although they have different encounters and fates, the brotherhood that is thicker than water eventually prevails over everything.
In the end, the five siblings reunited hand in hand, helped each other, and walked out of the predicament of life step by step, changing the fate of the family.
Four "Sheep Laws" on Family Development
Based on the above cases, we can summarize four important rules about sibling relationships in family development, which are in line with the internal truth of the "law of the herd".
First, there is an inverse relationship between parental preference and the child's ultimate achievement, that is, children who are doted on by their parents are more likely to fail, and children who are neglected are more likely to succeed.
This stems from the fact that the latter needs to be self-reliant and self-reliant, and to develop a tenacious will. Psychological data show that the reason for the unequal care of parents is mainly due to people's cognitive limitations and the influence of multiple social values.
Second, there is a positive correlation between sibling harmony and stable family development. If siblings work together in an orderly manner like a flock of sheep, they can help each other and share resources, benefiting the whole family.
According to a survey, the success rate of harmonious families is more than 20 times higher than that of unharmonious families. Therefore, siblings need to communicate and understand and cherish their feelings.
Third, for the "Adou" who is unwilling to make progress, it is necessary to give up decisively to prevent the overall involvement. Just like a flock, they will abandon their companions who have a poor sense of the law and are often alone.
It is more costly to mention one person who does not work hard than to mention ten people who work hard. The autobiographies of successful people show that cutting off bad relationships with friends and family is an important part of their success.
Fourth, individuals and families should achieve mutual coexistence, symbiosis and common prosperity. No matter how successful a person is, it is difficult to last long without family work; For a family to continue to grow and develop, it also needs outstanding talents as the mainstay.
History proves that the rise and fall of individuals and families are mutually exclusive.
Therefore, the proper application of the "law of the herd" will achieve twice the result with half the effort for the progress of the family and career. It contains the mystery of human relationships, which is worth everyone to experience.
How to grasp the "degree" in the sibling relationship
With regard to the care that parents have for their children, we must recognize that they are not absolutely equal. Because every parent is a limited cognitive subject, it is inevitable that they will be influenced by personal preferences; They are also in the midst of a multi-faceted conflict of values, with different generations and different classes having different parenting philosophies.
Therefore, children should not complain, but cherish all the love given by their parents.
In the same way, the amount of emotional investment between siblings does not need to be so equal. After all, everyone has different experiences and life trajectories in the process of growing up, and their values are constantly adjusted.
We just need to treat our siblings with sincerity and kindness, and think more from each other's point of view. For example, after success, don't forget the original difficulties, and don't be jealous and ruthless when you encounter difficulties.
Of course, sibling love can be expressed in various ways, such as language care, life care, career support, etc. Standards don't have to be rigid, they can be tailored to individual conditions.
What matters is the intention, not the formality.
For those "people who can't be kept" in the family who are really lagging behind, we must also learn to let go in time, bless calmly, and do not have to reluctantly maintain a superficial relationship.
Smart people need sincere friendship, not a burden in the cloak of affection. When learning Xi cut off, you should also be soft and kind, and have more warmth.