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My name is Li Mei, I am 28 years old and I have been married for three years. My husband Wang Qiang is an ordinary office worker, his parents are dead, he has no brothers and sisters, only me, his wife. Mother-in-law Zhang Yuzhen is in her 60s this year, retired at home, with a more traditional and conservative personality and meticulous work.
I have a general relationship with my mother-in-law, she is very demanding of me as a daughter-in-law, and often picks me for not being careful enough in housework and not taking care of her son enough. I also often think that she is too old-fashioned and unsophisticated. However, for the sake of family harmony, I can only swallow my anger and try to avoid direct confrontation with her.
One day after dinner, my mother-in-law suddenly said, "Daughter-in-law, I think the division of housework in our family is unreasonable, and it is too hard for you to be alone." From today onwards, we will implement a housework system and take turns to be responsible for all household chores, what do you say?"
I was a little surprised, my mother-in-law rarely cared about my feelings, why did she suddenly propose a housework system today? I hesitated for a moment and said, "Mother-in-law, I'm okay by myself, so don't worry about these trivial matters." I don't want to add to your burden. ”
The mother-in-law said firmly, "No! I have decided, and it is fair to you." From today onwards, we will take turns washing dishes, sweeping the floor, grocery shopping, cooking and other household chores. I've made a schedule where everyone has a few tasks per week, and it's absolutely fair and equitable. ”
My husband Wang Qiang was dumbfounded when he heard it: "Mom, it's not okay to change your style so suddenly? We have always been Meimei doing housework, so don't worry about it." ”
The mother-in-law said solemnly: "Son, it's not fair just because Meimei has been doing it all the time! I'm in good health, and I can share some of the housework, otherwise I don't want to go after seeing her busy every day." As a daughter-in-law, she must be working harder!"
Wang Qiang wanted to say something more, but was stopped by a stern look from his mother-in-law. I saw that my mother-in-law's attitude was so resolute, and it was difficult to shirk it anymore, so I could only say: "That's okay, mother-in-law, you have the final say." We tried the system in the hope of lightening my burden. ”
I looked at this detailed housework distribution sheet and couldn't help but feel the care of my mother-in-law. It seems that she really cares about my feelings and wants to reduce my housework burden through the system.
One day, my best friend Xiaofang came to visit the house and accidentally broke a teacup. Originally, as is customary, it was my task to clean up the debris. But the mother-in-law took the initiative to say: "Meimei, you can chat with Xiaofang, and I will clean up the pieces." ”
I hurriedly said, "Mother-in-law, this is my task, you can sit and rest." ”
The mother-in-law waved her hand and said, "I know that the fragment is your task today, but the guest is here, you should treat it well." I'll take care of this emergency. ”
I was very touched that my mother-in-law was so considerate, so I thanked me and continued to chat with Xiaofang. This little incident made me see that my mother-in-law really wanted to take care of me, not deliberately embarrassing me.
Another day, we came back from a trip as a family, all tired. Originally, it was Wang Qiang's task to wash the dishes today, but he was so tired that his mother-in-law took the initiative to say: "Son, you can rest, I'll do the dishes." ”
Wang Qiang said: "Mom, I should wash the dishes today, don't help me do it." ”
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "My son is the most obedient! But you also have to learn to take care of yourself, and when you are tired, you can take a break, and your mother will not mind." ”
Looking at my mother-in-law's smiling face, I couldn't help but laugh along. She's becoming more and more human.
In this way, under the careful deployment of her mother-in-law, the housework system became more and more smooth. My father-in-law and I no longer contradict each other, and even think it's a good arrangement.
But the good times didn't last long, my parents came to stay at my house for a few days, and the original housework distribution system was disrupted. I was busy serving my parents, my mother-in-law had to take care of the elders, and none of us had time to do the housework that was supposed to be done.
I was a little embarrassed, and my mother-in-law took the initiative to say, "Meimei, you can entertain your parents well, and I will handle the other housework." ”
I said, "Thank you so much, mother-in-law." I think we'll pause the system for a few days, and we'll talk about it when they're gone. ”
The mother-in-law nodded and said, "It's okay, don't be so rigid when you have the elders here, it doesn't matter if you change your plan temporarily, family reunion is the most important." ”
I was very touched by my mother-in-law's reasonableness. It seems that this system also has its shortcomings, and it cannot be implemented rigidly, and it needs to be flexible.
After a few days, after my parents left, we went back to the system. But after this disruption, I found that there were some problems with the system.
For example, on one occasion, my mother-in-law and I both accidentally forgot our tasks. When it was time to cook in the evening, we looked at each other, thinking that today didn't seem to be our task.
I said embarrassedly, "Mother-in-law, it seems that no one is making dinner today, what should I do?"
The mother-in-law was also a little panicked: "Yes, am I mistaken? Maybe you are wrong? We have to look at the schedule again." ”
After we rechecked, we found that tonight's dinner was originally scheduled to be Wang Qiang's task, but he worked overtime and went home late. The mother-in-law said, "It seems that we have to inform each other in advance in case this happens." You can't just take it lightly and forget your mission. ”
I nodded, and found that better communication and cooperation were needed to carry out household chores.
Another time, my mother-in-law and I had a disagreement. I had just swept the floor that day, and my mother-in-law frowned when she saw it.
She said: "Meimei, your sweeping method needs to be improved, and there is still dust on the ground." It needs to be cleaner. ”
I was a little dissatisfied and said, "Mother-in-law, I have already swept it very carefully, and it is impossible to be spotless." I look at the ground very clean. ”
The mother-in-law said, "You are a daughter-in-law, you must sweep the floor cleanly, and no dust should be left behind." ”
I said, "I don't think there's any need to be so demanding, right? there's no point in striving for perfection too much, and it's more reasonable to spend time on more important things." ”
We had some arguments as a result. Although my mother-in-law didn't force it in the end, I found that our standards were different, which would also lead to conflicts.
These questions made me think that maybe the system needs some adjustments to better suit everyone.
One day after dinner, I came up with my thoughts: "Mother-in-law, the system has been working well during this time, but I have found that there is still room for improvement. Can we be more flexible and assign tasks based on each person's characteristics and circumstances?"
The mother-in-law nodded: "What you said makes sense." It is true to consider each person's personality and Xi, rather than executing it mechanically. We can have a discussion about that. ”
After discussion, we adjusted the plan to make the system more humane and flexible.
After the implementation of the new plan, the atmosphere in the house has eased significantly. One day, I was working overtime and didn't have time to prepare dinner. I told my mother-in-law in advance, and my mother-in-law understood very well: "Go ahead, let's go, I'll cook dinner, you just concentrate on your work." ”
I said, "I'm sorry, mother-in-law, for you to help me cook." ”
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "What is there to be sorry for, didn't we say that we should cooperate with each other." I'm also happy cooking. ”
I was relieved to work overtime. My mother-in-law not only made dinner, but also helped me iron my clothes, which I was very impressed.
After I finished sweeping the floor on another day, my mother-in-law didn't pick on it anymore, but just said kindly: "Meimei, you swept well, but you can be more careful on the left and right." "I knew she was reminding me with good intentions, and I didn't think she was making things difficult for me.
Over time, this harmony has become a daily routine in our home. My mother-in-law often chats with me with a smile, cares about my work and life, and confides in me about her thoughts. She is no longer the stern and rigid mother-in-law, but more like a kind elder.
I no longer resist her, but sincerely thank her for her hard work and care. Every time she cooks, I take the initiative to help her clean up the kitchen and chat to make her happy.
One day, my mother-in-law suddenly said to me, "Meimei, since the practice, I have seen that you have become much more cheerful. You're not as scared of me anymore as you used to. I think our relationship has changed for the better, you say?"
I gladly replied, "You're right, mother-in-law. I could feel that our relationship had become much closer before I knew it. I no longer feel that you are mean, but I can feel your intentions. I've had a great time these days. ”
The mother-in-law nodded, her eyes a little moist: "When I proposed it, I just wanted to shorten the distance between us." Now it seems that my purpose has been achieved. I am really glad to have you as a good daughter-in-law. ”
I was also a little excited, but I didn't expect that the plan that I resisted at the beginning would eventually lead to a beautiful relationship.
Now thinking back to how surprised and resistant my mother-in-law was when she first proposed it. Who would have thought that a small housework distribution plan would change our fate.
It breaks down our original barriers, so that we are no longer mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but real family. My mother-in-law is no longer critical of me, but is patient and loving; I no longer resist her, but respect and care for her from the bottom of my heart.
One day, I took the initiative to say to my mother-in-law, "Mother-in-law, your idea of a system is really good! It has made our family much more harmonious." I want to say thank you!"
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "Silly girl, this is what I should do." If you can say that, I'm relieved. Let's get along well in the future, and don't have any more estrangements. ”
"Hmm!" I nodded happily, there was nothing to stop our relationship anymore.
After some time, my mother-in-law's birthday arrived. A total of 14 people, including me, Wang Qiang and my mother-in-law's relatives and friends, came to celebrate her birthday at home.
I took the initiative to say to my mother-in-law: "Mother-in-law, today is your birthday, you just sit happily, I will cook the meal, and I will clean up the house!"
The mother-in-law said with relief: "Good boy, then it will trouble you." Today you are the master, and I will sit back and enjoy its achievements!"
I happily prepared a sumptuous birthday dinner and made my own longevity noodles and red bean cakes, which my mother-in-law loved to eat. My mother-in-law was very moved when she saw that I was busy.
At the dinner, everyone raised their glasses to wish her mother-in-law a happy birthday and good health. The mother-in-law also smiled and talked enthusiastically with everyone.
Before leaving, my relatives praised me for my filial piety and ability. The mother-in-law proudly said to them, "You have all seen my good daughter-in-law, and I am so blessed!"
After sending off the guests, I was about to clean up the mess, but my mother-in-law kept me and said, "Meimei, I've worked hard for you today, I'll clean up the rest, and you can rest too!"
I thought for a moment and said, "Mother-in-law, I'm not tired yet, just sit down, this job is very simple!"
"That'll do. The mother-in-law smiled and nodded, "I am really blessed to have such a virtuous daughter-in-law as you! ”
When I finished my work, my heart was filled with happiness. Everything today makes me feel extremely relieved and satisfied
Everything today makes me feel extremely relieved and satisfied. Through the system, the gap between me and my mother-in-law has not only been bridged, but the relationship has become more intimate than ever.
"Mother-in-law, why did you get up so early to buy breakfast?" I was a little surprised.
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "I just want to give you a little surprise, you were busy for my birthday last night, I should be kind to you." Let's eat!"
I was very moved, my mother-in-law is really a different person, she has never been so considerate of me before. It seems that the system has allowed her to find the caring heart that she should have as an elder.
While we were having breakfast, my father-in-law called and said that his parents were coming to Beijing and wanted to see me.
I was a little embarrassed and said, "Then my mother-in-law and I have to think of a way to entertain a group of elders." ”
The mother-in-law took the initiative to say: "Meimei, you can take your father-in-law to pick up his parents, I will clean up the house, and you can accompany the elders as much as possible." ”
I hesitated, "Then I'm afraid you're working too your own." ”
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "What's the matter, you just have to worry about going." I can still keep my house in order. Our system works so well, I'm sure you'll be able to let me do it alone. ”
Hearing what my mother-in-law said, I put aside my worries and went to the station with my father-in-law to pick up his parents.
In the past few days, I have been doing my best to accompany my parents-in-law, taking them around Beijing and eating delicious food. My mother-in-law took care of life at home alone and cleaned up the house.
The father-in-law's parents were full of praise: "It is a blessing that Qiang Qiang has found such a virtuous daughter-in-law! And Granny Zhang is also an enlightened and capable person, and she knows how to let her daughter-in-law do her filial piety." ”
My father-in-law and I were very happy. I deeply feel that the system has not only improved my relationship with my mother-in-law, but also made the whole family more harmonious and united.
Before leaving, my father-in-law's mother told me separately: "Meimei, in the future, you must continue to be filial to your mother-in-law, take care of yourself, and live happily as you do now." ”
"Thank you, Mom! I will. I nodded happily.
After sending my in-laws away, my mother-in-law said to me with a smile: "Meimei, you have worked hard these days, and you can make the elders so satisfied.