Narrator: Fang Min
My name is Fang Min and I am 58 years old
People will understand at my age that in this life, people are not afraid of hardship and poverty, and a healthy family is better than anything else.
I used to hear that because children do not study Xi seriously, parents will beat and scold their children, I think that such parents are too dissatisfied, and the future of children is not only to learn Xi this way, as long as they can be healthy and happy by their side.
If my daughter could be as healthy as everyone else, I would not hesitate to let me go now.
When people were not satisfied, my husband and I originally gave birth to two healthy daughters, but when I saw that other people's children had both children, my husband discussed with me and wanted to fight for another son.
I originally disagreed, raising three children, it was too tiring, but thinking about the past years, because I didn't give birth to a son, I was blinded by my mother-in-law, and I agreed as soon as I gritted my teeth.
More than 20 years ago, a woman who was pregnant was not as squeamish as she is now, and only checked the B ultrasound once in more than five months, saying that the child was very good, so she went home to raise the fetus.
Since I gave birth to two children before, I didn't have much effort during the birth, but the son that the family was looking forward to turned into a daughter in the end, although our husband and wife were also disappointed, but they also slowly accepted the reality.
When my daughter grows up to the age of five, she is no different from a healthy child, she is smart and sensible, and she often chases her two older sisters to play together.
22 years ago, we took our little daughter back to my mother-in-law's house for the New Year, we arrived home on the 27th of the lunar month, and that night, when the whole family was asleep, the firewood stack in front of my mother-in-law's house was on fire, and when people found out, the fire was already uncontrollable.
I hurriedly woke up my sleeping daughter, dressed her and put on her shoes and ran out with her, the child saw the flames and hugged my neck tightly, I felt the child tremble all over, so I let the child bury his head in my chest and prevent her from looking at it again.
Fortunately, the fire was brought under control later, and it was just a firewood stack, and I thought that this matter would be over, but the next morning the little daughter still had an accident.
That morning, my little daughter woke up later than everyday, and I was scared enough last night that I didn't wake her up.
But when I finished breakfast, I found that the child's whole body was convulsing, foaming at the mouth, and a pair of eyes were rolling up.
This went on for about three minutes, and then the child slowly woke up, but he didn't know anything about the onset of the disease.
Looking at the child's haggard expression, I was both distressed and scared, and spent the New Year at my mother-in-law's house, and took the child on the road to seek medical advice on the 16th of the first month.
led the child to many large tertiary hospitals, and various instruments were used for various examinations, and the final conclusion was myocarditis.
Although I didn't believe this diagnosis at the time, several authoritative hospitals gave this result, prescribed a lot of medicines, and asked me to go home and take it on time.
After more than half a year, the child did not have another illness, I thought that the medicine had worked, or the child's illness was just an accident.
But since the child goes to kindergarten, this situation has reappeared.
Everyone who is a parent hopes that their son will become a dragon and a phoenix, and when the child is not good at learning and Xi and is greedy for fun, I will also scold my daughter.
That night, my daughter didn't finish her homework and was reprimanded by me, and the next morning, she had symptoms from a year ago, and I was so frightened that I couldn't stop slapping the child, but the symptoms only lasted a few minutes.
As the child grows up, from the first half a year to the next six months, three months or even a month, the time interval between the onset of the disease is getting shorter and shorter.
During this period, we went to the big hospital many times, and later diagnosed with epilepsy, and also prescribed a lot of drugs to treat epilepsy, and the doctor told us not to let the child be frightened or angry, and try to keep him physically and mentally happy.
Over the years, I have put all my energy on my little daughter, my heart is hanging all the time, even if one day the child will have another attack, due to the number of episodes, my daughter's eyes have been a little eye-to-eye, the doctor said that this is related to the onset of epilepsy.
In those years, no matter what my youngest daughter did, I tried to follow her to avoid her being emotional and angry, and even her two sisters spontaneously let their younger sisters, but slowly, the youngest daughter became more and more willful, unreasonable, and would lose her temper if something didn't go her way.
But as parents, how can we bear to blame our children, we dare not say a word of blame, for fear that the children will be angry, since the child became ill, our husband and wife have seen aging.
I didn't go to the hospital less, and I didn't take less medicine, but the number of episodes of illness was getting shorter and shorter, which parents didn't worry, we didn't eat well, we didn't sleep well, we worried about our daughter's future all day long, we could still take good care of our daughter when we were alive, but what would we do after we left? Her two sisters would still have their own families, and it was impossible to take care of her.
Obviously she was a smart and clever little girl before the age of five, but she took epilepsy medicine all the year round, and the child's memory is getting worse and worse, and the response is slower than that of children of the same age, which is what we are most worried about.
Sometimes I often wonder why I have to fight for a third child, but God just wants to punish me? But no matter how much I regret it, the facts are already in front of me, and I can only grit my teeth and hold on.
But my daughter is older, and slowly, things are developing in an uncontrollable direction.
In her 20s, it is the age of youthful throbbing, and although her daughter's reaction is a little worse than normal, she will also look forward to a beautiful love in her heart.
The son can't help it, the daughter doesn't stay, and the daughter secretly talks about love with someone on the Internet.
This scared me enough, I bitterly let my daughter break off with him, but my daughter was used to being willful since she was a child, and never listened to me, there was no way, I could only check my daughter.
It turned out that the man was also near our house, five years older than my daughter, but he had been divorced once, and although he had no children, his family conditions were really not very good.
Originally, I didn't agree to this marriage, but the child insisted on getting married.
My original plan was not to want the child to enter the marriage, a girl in married life, to face firewood, rice, oil and salt, face the relationship between husband and wife and mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, how can I not be angry, do not talk about it, I am afraid that the child's illness will be serious.
But my husband persuaded me that since I couldn't stop the child, then we would try to combine them, after all, we can't follow the child forever, and the day we left, we still need someone to take care of her, and slowly, I had to compromise.
The daughter fell in love with the man for a year, and finally entered the palace of marriage, but the daughter did not tell her about her illness, and we chose to hide it.
Because since I went to a big hospital in Beijing and took the medicine prescribed from there, my daughter has not been sick again for more than a year, which also gives us hope, I don't want to tell the man, I just don't want the man to see my daughter clearly, if she is cured, it can become a permanent secret.
But it was this incident that made us indirectly harm our daughter.
The ideal is very plump, but the reality is very skinny, how can there be a marriage that never quarrels.
After getting married, the daughter became pregnant soon after, maybe it was the nourishment of love, maybe it was the medicine that worked, until the child was born, and the daughter did not get sick again, which made our hanging hearts slowly let go.
But the good days are so short after all, since the birth of the child, there are more and more contradictions between the young couple, because they gave birth to a daughter, the mother-in-law always looks at the daughter-in-law unpleasantly, and the unsatisfactory married life has led to the daughter getting sick again.
When I called in the morning, I drove to my son-in-law's house without combing my hair, and when I saw my daughter lying on the bed with a pale face, my heart was like a knife.
It turned out to be the middle of the night, and the young couple had a quarrel because of the child's crying, and the daughter slept with gas, so it caused the onset.
It is because of this disease that the man always thinks that we deceive them, and the daughter does not get a good face in their family, and the number of episodes becomes more and more frequent.
Since the divorce, my daughter has been stimulated, even if she takes medicine on time, she will often get sick, and the onset of the disease used to be a little regular, mostly in the morning, but now, it is possible to become a patient anytime and anywhere.
Since my daughter's divorce, I retired early, just to take care of my daughter all day and prevent her from having accidents.
When she was not married, she was still a lively and active girl, and since she got married, she has been stimulated and has become stupid.
Seeing my daughter like this, sometimes I secretly shed tears, it was I who hurt my daughter, why should I fight for a third child, if there is no patriarchal thinking, my daughter will not come to the world to suffer this kind of sin.
I also hated myself for why I didn't stop my daughter in the first place, I shouldn't have let her get married, knowing that in the face of marriage, ten bets and ten losses, but I always held a fluke in my heart, and felt that it was good to have one more person to love my daughter.
At that time, I didn't understand the truth, "Only parents can tolerate their children unconditionally!"
Due to the perennial worry and fatigue, my health is getting worse and worse, but for the sake of my daughter, I want me to strive to live a few more years, because parents are the permanent support of my daughter, and I don't want my daughter to be lonely in the future.
I am telling my story today to tell you how important it is to have a good prenatal check-up when you are pregnant and give birth to a healthy baby.
If your child has a disease like this, try to avoid getting married, it can only be the beginning of a bigger nightmare.
I just hope that I can live longer and spend more time with my daughter.
This article is the original debut of Toutiao, and it has been defended by the whole network, and plagiarism must be investigated#文章首发挑战赛! #