My surname is Wang, and I am an ordinary family in the middle income class. My parents live with me, my father is retired at home and my mother is a retired teacher. Our family lives in an old neighborhood, and the heating of the whole building is centrally heated by the property. Some time ago, the property informed us that the heating would be stopped this year, and I, as the main source of income, felt that this extra expense was really a bit unbearable. So after repeated persuasion from my family, I decided not to pay the heating bill this year, but to buy my own heating equipment.
However, what he didn't expect was that on the second day of the heating stop, a family in the downstairs community came to knock on the door, and it turned out to be his little girl. Her very childish voice told me that she was feeling cold and wished I could turn the heating on again. She said that her grandparents were old, and she was afraid that they would not be able to stand the cold. I was embarrassed and explained to her about our family, but the little girl didn't understand and she repeatedly begged me to turn on the heating for her.
"Uncle Wang, are you kind, okay? My house is really cold!" she was holding a worn-out plush toy, and her eyes were shining with anticipation, making it a little difficult for me to refuse her request.
"Little girl, our family didn't mean it, it was really a last resort due to financial constraints. Go back, I'll figure it out. "I tried to comfort her. The girl's tearful eyes were still fixed on me, as if expecting some whim.
So over the next few days, I kept thinking about it. Gradually, I realized that it wasn't just a matter of heating, but a matter of relationships between people living next to each other in our community.
I pondered for a long time about family relationships, neighborhood relationships, and interpersonal interactions, and also asked my parents for their opinions. They said that the warmth of society is more valuable in times of economic hardship, so they supported me to think about it again. At this moment, I suddenly understood a truth: in the social family, everyone should do their part to help others.
So, I re-communicated with the little girl's family and came up with my plan and approach. The family showed a very grateful attitude, it turned out that they did not maliciously rub the heat, but the family was in financial difficulties. I promised to help them find a way to ensure the livelihood of their own family and add more harmony to the relationship between their neighbors.
It was then that I learned the truth from the little girl: it turned out that the little girl's grandparents were my teachers when I was a child, and they had always been the most respected neighbors in our community. My little girl's grandfather used to take good care of me, and I still remember the love and help he gave me when I was a child. Now, it's time for me to repay them.
The heating in our house was turned back on, and the little girl's family was resolved. This incident also seemed to affect the atmosphere of the whole community, and everyone was more polite and subtle to me.
However, just when I thought the dust had settled, something unexpected happened. One rainy night for several days, I was about to take a shower and get ready to rest, when I suddenly heard an anxious knock on the door downstairs, I opened the door, and it turned out to be the little girl's grandfather. He looked panicked and told me that the roof of his house was leaking and that some of the important items piled up in the house were wet. He asked me to help me solve this difficult problem.
I was surprised by this, and I immediately walked with him to his house and saw the leak, some water had accumulated on the ceiling, and there were traces of dampness in the cardboard box in the corner. The little girl's grandfather was holding a rag on the hanging cloth to stop the water, and the little girl's grandmother was busy worriedly.
I immediately helped find tools to try to deal with the leak. However, the root of the problem was not within my reach, and I needed to find a professional to repair the roof. Faced with the plight of the little girl's family, I felt a little powerless, after all, I was just an ordinary office worker and was not capable of solving such a big problem.
When I hesitated how to ask, the little girl's grandfather suddenly spoke: "Mr. Wang, although our family didn't cause you trouble, after all, this matter was caused by the previous heating problem. We still remember how much you did us a favor. If you didn't help at the time, maybe our family had a conflict with your family over the heating issue. ”
His words surprised and left me a little surprised. Actually, it's not that I didn't fail to take this into account, but it wasn't for anything in return. I thought the problem was solved, but I didn't expect the contradiction to extend from it. Now, his words put me in an even more awkward position.
I don't want to have conflicts with others because of the heating problem, and I don't want to take advantage of other people's difficulties to win their sympathy and interests. But after all, the problem has happened, how can I solve it, and how can I explain it to the little girl's family? Now, I just want to be able to calm their worries, guilt, and grievances. It really wasn't what I expected, and I don't know if it was a form of incompetence on my part or a continuation of a grudge.
During this period, because my family and the little girl's family downstairs had a closer relationship, we often corresponded. The little girl's grandparents also invited me to their house from time to time to chat. Gradually, I also established a deep friendship with them, and my life became more colorful.
However, at this moment of harmony, a storm of family conflicts suddenly hits. One night, the door of the little girl's house was closed, and I smelled something wrong. The next day, the little girl came to my house and told me with tears in her eyes that her parents had a quarrel and that there was a possibility of divorce. She asked me to help her figure out a way to reconcile her mom and dad. And I also felt a sense of powerlessness at this time, after all, when it comes to conflicts in other people's families, I can't solve them in a simple way.
This incident changed my original view of family issues, and I began to understand how complex and intractable conflicts in the family are. I couldn't help but fall into a conflict, on the one hand I wanted to help the little girl solve her family's problems, and on the other hand I felt powerless. At this time, I became more aware of the complexity and intractability of interfering in other people's families, and at the same time, I also realized that I need to know how to do it in moderation in family matters.
These days, the affairs of the little girl's family have become the talk of our community, causing a lot of discussion. I think that in the face of family problems, perhaps the best way is to let the person concerned solve it on their own, and we can only give appropriate care and support on the sidelines. Perhaps, I should maintain a proper sense of distance to avoid the unnecessary distractions caused by getting involved in family disputes. However, for the little girl, I still want to help her as much as I can, at least give her some companionship and listening.
The cooperation between the little girl's family and ours has paid off, and they are very grateful when the heating is turned on. Our family also felt the warmth of neighbors and the importance of helping each other. And during this period of communication, the little girl and I gradually became friends, and every time she came back from school, she would come up to talk to me.
However, just as we begin to feel the joy of living in harmony, a sudden event shatters the tranquility. One day, my mom told me that she had found some unidentified objects in the flower beds downstairs. She suspected that it was garbage thrown by the little girl's family, and was very dissatisfied. I also felt a little unhappy when I heard this, because I had already reminded them with the little girl's parents to pay attention to environmental hygiene.
So, I decided to talk to the little girl's parents about it. I thanked them for our cooperation in heating up, and then tactfully mentioned the problem of garbage. Unexpectedly, the little girl's parents didn't think so, they even thought that we were deliberately finding fault, and said that we didn't clean it up when we stopped heating. In the face of their attitude, I became a little angry, but I didn't know how to properly express my dissatisfaction and grievances.
I was deeply troubled by this incident, and I felt sad and disappointed that the beautiful neighborhood relationship had suddenly broken down. I understand that every family has a scripture that is difficult to read, but I don't want to give up on our good relationship. I am determined to communicate with them again, hoping to resolve this conflict and maintain the harmony of our neighbors.
Soon, I became the coordinator of his family's relationship with their neighbors, helping them with some of their daily problems. My parents were also very pleased with my efforts to build relationships with my neighbors. During that time, my parents and neighbors got along better, and the people in the community gradually developed some good impressions of our family.
One night, however, my father suddenly suggested that he had a serious conversation with me, and that he thought that my relationship with their family had gradually become unclear, and that I had helped them beyond what was acceptable, and that our relationship had become somewhat ambiguous. He thought it was unconventional, and that I should focus on my family and my relationships.
My father's words left me confused and embarrassed. I understand his concerns, but I also know exactly what I mean. In the face of my father's questioning, I seemed a little hesitant and did not know how to answer him. I have also always believed that as the only child in the family, I have a responsibility to take care of them, but at the same time I am also aware that my actions may have had some unintended impact on the family.
It made me rethink my behavior. It was clear to me that my original intention was not to destroy family harmony, but to be able to help others within my limited capabilities. However, when I really give to a family, can I really guarantee that it will not have a negative impact on my family? I began to struggle inwardly, understanding my father's expectations, but also unable to let go of my care and responsibility for the little girl's family.
During this time, I was often alone in the house, and I thought about it in my heart, trying to find the best way to solve the problems between me and the little girl's family without hurting the family relationship. But every time I think of the hope in the little girl's eyes and the trust she placed in me, I can't make up my mind.
Now, I'm in a dilemma. I don't know how this family and neighborhood entanglement will end, and I don't know how I'm going to deal with it next.
Soon, the little girl's family and my family became closer. The family also showed a certain amount of financial wealth, so the heating problem was solved. We started to help each other, and life became a lot better for everyone. And I really felt the warmth and kindness of the neighbors.
However, family conflicts don't really seem to be far away. Not long ago, my mother made a suggestion that I couldn't swallow. She said that she had already discussed with the little girl's mother and was ready to let the little girl stay in our house to receive counseling from my mother, hoping that she would receive more care and care in her studies and life. Upon hearing this offer, I immediately fell silent. I love my mom and want my little girls to have a better education and life. But I feel that this decision may cause a certain burden on her family and her own feelings.
I discussed it with the little girl's grandparents, and they were grateful, but they also felt that the little girl should be allowed to grow up in their own home. I was struggling internally and couldn't make a decision. When my mother made this suggestion to me again, I shirked it for various reasons. I don't want to ruin the happiness of the little girl in my own family, but I can't refuse my mother's concern for the little girl. This selfishness and helplessness makes me feel conflicted inside.
The whole family relationship became strained as a result. My relationship with my mother has also been affected to some extent. We used to be very close mother and son, but now I feel that we have become strangers and distant. I didn't know what to choose, and it was very painful for me. I'm still thinking about how to find a solution that will make the little girl better without hurting her family. This contradiction and confusion may stay with me for a long time.