Image source@Visual China
文 | Tech星球，作者 | 王琳、任雪芸、习睿
Dong Mingzhu, chairman of Gree, once again appeared on the hot search because of his unpleasant remarks.
This time, it was netizens who found that Dong Mingzhu proposed legislation in an interview in March this year to charge training fees for employees' job-hopping. It's not just Dong Mingzhu. Former Oriental Selection CEO Sun Dongxu's remarks about fans holding a meeting with black faces in the live broadcast room also made young people very unhappy.
In the eyes of many young people, Dong Mingzhu and Sun Dongxu's remarks reveal a typical kind of "paternal preaching", they ignore the actual situation of others, blindly carry out condescending preaching, but do not provide effective help and solutions, and are regarded as "paternal leaders".
Typical paternal preaching often begins with "you young people", "I didn't say you", "I was working overtime until late at your age", and what they like to talk about most is their glorious deeds back then, encouraging selfless dedication, and it seems that they can achieve success like this.
In fact, everyone's success is the bonus of the times and personal efforts, and the successful experience of the past may not be suitable for the current environment. The era of "daddy leaders" is the era of the rising period, they may not need to work hard to get a house, but now is the era of involution, young people work overtime, and they may be laid off.
Now, the management method of "daddy leadership" is no longer suitable for today's young people. As a result, the new group of migrant workers refuse to draw cakes, preferring to receive tangible benefits and help. On Zhihu, a high praise replied that the reason why "daddy's words" are annoying is because the trainer may not have the qualifications to admonish others, and for those who are qualified, the method proposed by them, which often solves the problem in a simple and crude way, is completely inapplicable to the situation of the obedient.
What is the situation in the workplace between these "daddy leaders" and the battle between the workers against the "daddy leaders". Tech Planet interviewed several young people to see how they said "no" to "daddy leaders".
The boss usually tries his best to draw cakes for the employees, and disappears without a trace when he runs away
We are an educational institution with operations all over the country, and there will be a company meeting every year before the "double reduction", similar to the annual meeting of Internet companies.
From 2016 when I came to work in Beijing to the time when the boss ran away, I have been in this company, and I deeply understand that the company's culture is determined by the will of the founder, and before the boss ran away, most of the employees in the company were like his believers.
He was very good at painting cakes for us, and there were two conferences that I remember very well. Once, when he asked everyone to stand up at a conference and answer the question, "What are your dreams?", I just said that I wanted to be an ordinary person.
At that time, the boss's face changed suddenly, but then he began to brag about his experience, starting a business from penniless twenty years ago, working hard every day, unable to sleep or eat if he couldn't recruit students, until now, although there are dozens of stores, he still works hard and does not ask for anything in return.
When I first came to this company, I only had more than 300 yuan a month during the half-year Xi period. Even though I work hard, I will be deducted money every month for various reasons. He stepped on the cusp of the times because he started early, and we now have to worry about rent every month.
He is very good at "inspiring" us with his performance, and when we see him, if we pass by him to say hello, he will turn a blind eye and only smile back at the teacher who sells the most classes in the company. At every conference, he said most often, each of you can be replaced, if you can't contribute to the company, then why should the company support you?
He also has a penchant for exaggeration. At another conference, he said on stage that a colleague had made a lot of money and bought a house in Beijing because he worked very hard and had a good performance. Later, we learned through this colleague that the house was not actually in Beijing, but in a county in Hebei.
However, we found that this management style is not applicable to many colleagues, sometimes the performance is not good, in fact, it may be the market off-season, but some colleagues will fall into self-questioning, will feel that they are not working hard enough, which leads to this result.
What's even more outrageous is that after the epidemic began, because we couldn't attend classes, our wages were adjusted to the minimum wage, and I wanted to resist at the time, but what I didn't expect was that in addition to me and two other colleagues, dozens of other people in the Beijing campus chose to tide over the difficulties with the company, and they said that they would donate the money to the boss.
Later, not long after the resumption of offline classes, there was news that the boss ran away, this time he did not send a notice to all employees, and disappeared without a trace, no one knew the news in advance, and suddenly sent a notice of class suspension. Many parents approached us and asked for a refund, but at that time our wages and commissions were already in arrears.
Later, on the company's WeChat public account, he posted an open letter, still familiar with words, saying that he would spend his whole life to repay his debts. Many of my colleagues believe this, too, and even accuse us of not being impulsive when we ask for a paycheck.
It's been almost two years, and now the ending is that I still don't know where he is, but the good thing is that the colleagues who were brainwashed before have gradually woken up, and we all have new jobs now, but we will no longer believe in the pie drawn by the boss.
After a big quarrel with the "daddy leader" for not allowing me to take leave, I was fired
One of my former leaders had nearly 20 years of work experience overseas, and when I was recruited, we had two in-depth conversations, one on the phone and one offline. Later, because of the salary and the company's reputation, I chose to join the company, but I didn't expect to start a nightmare for half a year.
Once I was riding the elevator with her, and a colleague was resting at home because of sick leave, but she suddenly took out the phone and called and said that she wanted to arrange a job for the other party. "You can't even look at the plans you make", "I asked you to work, not to teach you how to work", "I want the company to pay you a salary and be a teacher for you"...... That tone seemed to tell us to sell all our time to the company.
We've heard things like that too many times in three months. But she gave us little substantive guidance other than criticizing us. For example, when faced with our project proposal, she always puts forward opinions such as "why use this font?", "is the white space on both sides of the border different?", "your font color is not regular", but she has few suggestions for the content of the plan itself.
A colleague who has been working for nearly a decade chose to leave because he couldn't stand the blow. Later, I had a direct conflict with her, because my family had a problem with the physical examination and needed an operation, so I communicated with her to use annual leave and ask for it according to the amount of half a day, so that I could go to work every day without delaying the progress of work. But she put on a "what's my business" expression, pretending not to see the leave application, and didn't communicate with me in any way.
At the beginning, I held back my anger and begged her in person, and I had to grind back and forth with her a few times every half-day off. The third time she suddenly had a hard time and used a lot of force to buckle the computer, and at that time my anger surged, and I smashed a bunch of things directly on the desk. What I don't quite understand is that it is a reasonable request for leave, and I have promised not to delay work, why not give me leave? Do you want to dedicate 7*24 hours to the company?
Later, when I was in the hospital with my family for a check-up, she used a work app to accuse me of taking leave and delaying work, and I scolded her directly and repeatedly for several rounds.
After these conflicts, our relationship became worse and worse, until she came back from a small vacation, she asked HRBP to talk about my resignation, and also pretended to put on the name of business adjustment, perhaps consciously to pay the loss, and later the company compensated me according to the law. Because I kept in touch with my colleagues, they all went through what happened to me and got fired.
In the past six months, I was extremely painful, and I have been vacillating in the struggle for PUA and personal interests, until the afternoon of my departure, I got on the elevator and immediately sent her a large number of words, including some ugly and contemptuous of her ability, and by the way, I blocked and deleted her, but at that time, I finally felt that I was alive.
The leader always said that he only took two or three thousand ten years ago, and we don't know how to cherish and be grateful
I used to work in a bank, our leader was a middle-aged woman in her 40s, I joined the bank as soon as I graduated, and the leader required us to come 1 hour earlier in the morning than the old staff. Her reasoning was that coming early would allow the leaders to see the mental outlook of young people, and that we had just graduated and had no family to take care of and not so much sleep.
But we've just graduated and generally live farther away. Arriving early means getting up earlier. However, because he was a relative of the leader, he did not dare to resist at all. At that time, the whole working environment was very bad, for example, the team leader of the whole office poured water for the leader in the morning, arranged flowers, wiped the table, praised her hairstyle, jewelry and clothes, and accompanied her to take breakfast.
She also asked us to work overtime, but there was no overtime pay. I was very impressed, she said at the time, what are you doing when you go home? Watching TV or scrolling on your mobile phone? Now I don't know how to work overtime and be a grassroots worker all my life? Then I really obey you, you don't have to be in my group. It's like you can get promoted just by working overtime, but I just want to make some money, I don't want to be promoted, you don't need to kidnap me like this.
She always mentions her experience when she was young, saying that she only took two or three thousand ten years ago, and we don't know how to cherish and be grateful now. But ten years ago, a house in Beijing was only a square meter, and now it is how much it is. You can't just think about absolute values and ignore skyrocketing prices.
Moreover, leaders always like to ask us to take notes during meetings, no matter how big or small. Once the business benchmark said that she took a big pot to fetch water in the morning every day, so that she didn't have to waste time to fetch water all day, and she asked us to write it down in a notebook. But if you drink a big pot of water, you will go to the toilet, and she even said that she will only go to the toilet once in the morning.
If you don't take a notebook, she'll scold you. If you don't do what she says, she'll tell you, I'm not asking you, just reminding you what kind of person the leader likes. If you don't want to do whatever you want, don't let me give you a chance in the future.
These statements were always preachy. The most terrifying thing is that she especially likes to watch shows, and any festival has to arrange programs for her, and there are countless annual meetings, New Year's Day, and Lantern Festival...... There was a girl in our group who could play the ukulele, and she asked that girl to go every time. The key schedule program also wastes working time, and you have to work overtime when it's over.
After a year on the job, I couldn't stand it anymore and finally chose to leave.
Even the posture of throwing garbage has to be managed, and I have gone from being rebellious and rigid to leaving
Actually, I didn't know what a "daddy leader" was, and it wasn't until recently that I realized that the boss of my previous company was the legendary "daddy leader".
I've been working in design for a long time, last in an advertising agency with a small team. I need to be responsible for docking with Party A's requirements and then providing design manuscripts.
The boss needs everything related to the business to be executed according to his ideas, even if it is not what the client wants. At work, it often happens that even if the client has finalized it, as long as the plan does not follow the boss's ideas, it will ask for a redo. This adds a huge amount of work to my workload.
When I first joined the company, when I encountered this situation in work communication, I would not refute it, and I did not even dare to put forward my own opinions. I will only reflect on whether I have a problem, whether I am not capable enough to meet the requirements of the leader.
I've just been with this company for a week and want to change jobs. Because I've sensed that something isn't quite right with the leader. But I thought I might be able to get along more. But a month later, another company was poaching me, and I asked to leave again, and my boss chose to give me a salary increase to keep me.
But in one year, the boss's control over the staff has changed from work to individual. He will comment on your dress and personal behavior, such as not messing up your desk and not eating takeout at your desk.
During the course of the work, another clerical position has been changed by three people. Gradually, I felt that as long as you couldn't meet his requirements, even breathing would be a mistake. Even the posture of throwing garbage should be preached. I began to realize that it might not be me who had the problem. The company spends money to buy my time, but I can't buy my values and personal Xi.
About half a year after joining the company, I no longer have mental exhaustion. When my boss criticizes me, I turn back in a gentle, joking tone.
In June this year, in the process of docking with Party A, there was once again a situation where the customer was satisfied, but the boss completely denied it. Obviously, the details of the plan have been communicated with Party A, but the boss asked to redo it.
This time, I no longer revised the plan according to his ideas, and I had a head-on dispute with the leader on the spot. At that time, my mentality was that I would not change the plan again. The leader saw that I was resolute and the construction period was limited, so I had to agree not to modify the plan and implement it directly.
Even though it was my boss who compromised me this time, I couldn't get along with this boss anymore. After dealing with the work at hand, I applied for resignation to the leader in person. I was also very tough, saying that I would continue to do this for a month and give him time to recruit new employees.
Probably to the boss's surprise, he was expressionless and didn't keep me. However, when I left, my boss did not give me the year-end bonus I deserved as agreed. I'm not hopeful anymore and I don't want to have anything to do with this company anymore.
After I left my job, I spent three months traveling, and I needed to adjust myself and get back to a healthy mental state.