Preamble:
Will you really be desperate because of the relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?
When a woman stands on top of a tall building, she is faced not only with the choice between life and death, but also with the disappointment of the relationship between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and the relationship between husband and wife.
After all, she chose to commit suicide, leaving endless pain in the hearts of her relatives.
So, what made her give up everything? This tragedy is actually thought-provoking.
The first conflict after marriage
In 2014, Kang Sanxia and Zhang Kai entered the palace of marriage.
At that time, they were still young, full of infinite longing and expectation for the future.
In Zhang Kai's view, Sanxia is lively, cheerful, delicate and lovely, and is the best destination in his life.
Sanxia smiled and the two little tiger teeth looked particularly cute and moving, and her sincere and enthusiastic personality made Zhang Kai deeply attracted.
He felt that Sanxia was like a ray of sunshine that could illuminate everywhere he went and bring him endless joy.
And Sanxia was also deeply moved by Zhang Kai's sincerity.
She could see that Zhang Kai was dedicated and serious about his feelings.
There was a sense of maturity and stability in his big black eyes, which made her feel very reassured.
Sanxia believes that with him, her future will be happy.
In the first year after marriage, the young couple lived very happily.
Every morning, Zhang Kai would gently wake up Sanxia and prepare a hot breakfast for her.
They ate and talked, talked about each other's little secrets, and planned where they would go on vacation for the weekend.
Sanxia's laughter echoed throughout the house, it was a happy time for the newlywed Yan'er.
However, the good times did not last long, and after the mother-in-law moved in with them, the conflict between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law followed.
In fact, the mother-in-law has a stubborn personality and is not easy to get along with; Sanxia is childlike again, and the two women do inevitably have run-in problems.
At first, the quarrel only stayed on the small things of life, such as the time to eat, the way to do the laundry, etc.
Sanxia would complain to Zhang Kai at first, hoping that he could come forward to mediate.
She felt that this was just a difference in the Xi habits of the two parties, and she could always understand and give in through communication.
But Zhang Kai's reaction was always partial to his mother, which made Sanxia very sad.
In fact, the reason why Zhang Kai is like this is also related to his growth experience.
He was raised by a single mother alone, so he naturally has a deep guilt for his mother.
Whenever his mother and wife had an argument, he couldn't help but stand by his mother's side.
Sanxia can actually understand Zhang Kai's mood, but she didn't expect this bias to last so long.
Slowly, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is getting deeper and deeper, and it is no longer a habit of life Xi generalize.
They quarreled over their children's education, accusing each other of being incompetent.
The mother-in-law insisted that her grandson learn Xi classical music, but Sanxia felt that it was not necessary; Sanxia allows her children to play video games, while her mother-in-law sternly disagrees.
The two sides refused to give in to each other, and the quarrel was red-faced.
Zhang Kai understood that things were getting worse, but he could no longer mediate them, and could only watch the relationship between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law deteriorate day by day.
He himself is actually very helpless - his mother means a lot to him, and naturally he doesn't want her to be sad; And Sanxia is his favorite wife, and seeing her crying to herself with red eyes makes his heart break.
Zhang Kai was in a dilemma, and he finally chose to escape and let the contradiction between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law rise infinitely.
The conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law escalated and the pain that could no longer be endured
In 2017, Sanxia filed for divorce from Zhang Kai, claiming that she couldn't stand such a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship.
She said she had had enough mental torture in this marriage, and that her personality had been trampled to the point of incompleteness.
At this point, she just wants to leave and start over.
Zhang Kai was really taken aback, and even his parents persuaded him to cherish his family and give Sanxia another chance.
Sanxia finally chose to stay, but this has buried hidden dangers.
The rift between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is getting deeper and deeper, and Zhang Kai's partiality has never been corrected.
Finally, one day in 2020, the contradiction completely escalated.
The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law quarreled again over the children's homework, and turned up all kinds of past grievances.
Sanxia wants her children to learn some social skills and increase their entertainment time; The mother-in-law insisted that the child concentrate on learning Xi and was not allowed to play mobile games.
The two had a fierce argument, and the mother-in-law finally released cruel words, saying that Sanxia was a negative man who refused to fulfill her mother's duties.
This made Sanxia unable to sleep and had a mental breakdown to the extreme.
What's even more excessive is that Zhang Kai not only did not stop his mother, but also asked loudly in front of Sanxia: "What have you paid for marrying into this family for so many years?"
This was undoubtedly the last straw that broke the camel's back.
Sanxia's whole body collapsed, and she realized that she had no dignity in her life.
Raising children and taking care of the family, these efforts seem worthless in the eyes of Zhang Kai and his mother-in-law.
You are like an ornament, you can blame and insult at will.
This kind of life is really miserable.
Sanxia fell into endless despair.
She no longer has any expectations for Zhang Kai, and can only choose the final relief.
That night, Sanxia locked herself in the house, left a note for her family, and jumped from the 28th floor.
By the time Zhang Kai got home, it was too late.
Grief-stricken parents
When the news of Sanxia's death came, her parents were simply grief-stricken.
Kang Dinggui didn't close his eyes all night, and tears flowed all over his face.
He felt unprecedented guilt - he obviously didn't agree with Sanxia being with this man, but he still didn't stop his daughter from making a mistake.
Now that it is too late to regret it, he will remember his daughter's desperate figure on a tall building for the rest of his life.
The day after Sanxia's death, her parents, Kang Dinggui, and her family came to their son-in-law's house to ask for an explanation.
Zhang Kai's mother not only shirked her responsibility, but also said that her parents-in-law were bullying their mother and son.
This made Kang Dinggui's family extremely angry, and the conflict between the two families intensified.
Kang Dinggui pointed at Zhang Kai's nose and scolded: "It's all your useless son-in-law, who killed my Sanxia!"
Later, under mediation, Zhang Kai said that he would give his parents-in-law 500 yuan a month for living expenses, and give 240,000 yuan to hold a funeral for Sanxia to show his remorse.
Although the parents-in-law lost their beloved daughter, they could only accept this result.
After all, Sanxia's departure is an established fact, and they don't want this matter to affect their daughter's death.
However, the good times did not last long, and the next day the parents-in-law repented and made an unbelievable request - let Zhang Kai's mother hold Sanxia's body and parade on the street to apologize.
This was beyond Zhang Kai's bottom line, and he could no longer accept it, so he decided to go to court to revoke his previous promise.
In fact, the parents-in-law's request was also caused by a temporary loss of emotional control.
They really couldn't bear Sanxia to die like this, such a lively and cheerful daughter should have a better life.
This grievance and grief needed an outlet, so they targeted the mother and son.
In fact, Kang Dinggui also understands that this is a bit excessive, but he really can't keep his sanity for a while.
After all, the court resolved the conflict
Faced with the unreasonable demands of his parents-in-law, Zhang Kai decisively sued them to court.
Now, things are getting bigger.
Both sides escalated the conflict to the legal level, and each side did not give in to each other.
Zhang Kai claimed that the pledge was signed under duress and had no legal effect; And his parents-in-law asked him to keep his word.
The court held several court sessions, but failed to resolve the contradictions between the two sides.
The judge decided to investigate the ins and outs of the matter and find out the grievances between the two families.
A month later, the judge revealed a number of issues that neither side had noticed:
Zhang Kai's upbringing made it difficult for him to truly understand his wife's feelings; And the parents-in-law also have prejudices against their son-in-law and have never fully accepted him.
In addition, Sanxia's congenital heart disease also aggravated her vulnerability.
A combination of reasons led to this tragedy.
With the help of the judge, both Kang Dinggui and Zhang Kai realized that they had also made mistakes, and gradually calmed down and shook hands.
They finally opened the knot in their hearts, and even the original rigid relationship was loosened.
According to the previous agreement, Zhang Kai still has to give his parents-in-law 500 yuan a month for living expenses and repay the loan.
It's just that the compensation of 240,000 yuan has no legal effect, and he can not give it.
At this point, Sanxia can finally be buried, and this matter is over.
Reflections on the tragedy of marriage
However, how should we reflect on this tragedy? A big reason why Sanxia has gone to a dead end is that Zhang Kai has been partial to her mother for a long time and has not given her the status she deserves.
This may have something to do with Zhang Kai's upbringing - he was raised by a single mother alone, so he naturally feels guilty about his mother.
But a mature and responsible man, after establishing his own family, should give priority to his wife and children.
Zhang Kai's handling of this is obviously insufficient, and he should also bear the main responsibility.
He could have put himself in Sanxia's shoes and understand the contradictions between his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from her standpoint.
But for a long time, Zhang Kai chose to avoid and let the problem worsen, which eventually led to the death of his wife.
Of course, the parents-in-law's later demands were too extreme.
Their hearts are indeed full of grief, but this has constituted a damage to Zhang Kai's mother and son, and it cannot make up for the departure of Sanxia.
In the end, the law has to be relied on to settle this dispute, which may show the paranoia and irrationality of many people in dealing with interpersonal relationships today.
Epilogue:
In any case, the lessons of this tragedy are profound.
It makes us reflect on the way we get along with each other, and whether we can maintain restraint and rationality in the face of the inevitable run-ins in family life.
In reality, many tragedies do not have to happen.
When you and I can be more tolerant and considerate, maybe the outcome will be different.
Each of us will experience the ups and downs of life, and we will all face various hardships.
But don't give up easily, because happiness will always exist, but sometimes we ignore it.
Keep the hope, keep going, and you will see the light eventually.