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Just last month, I received a call that caught me off guard. On the other end of the phone was my ex-boyfriend Li Jian, we had been in a relationship for two years in college, and then broke up for various reasons.
"Li Mei, my mother suddenly fell ill and has been admitted to the hospital. My condition is not stable yet, and I plan to take a month off to take care of her in the hospital, but I also need someone to accompany me during the day, which is really difficult to arrange. Can you please come to the hospital and take care of me for a few days?" Li Jian's voice was full of anxiety and pleading.
"Li Mei, I know this is a problem for you, but I really can't do anything else. The relationship between us in the past, please help me for the sake of the past. Li Jian's tone softened.
After thinking about it, I agreed. After all, Li Jian was not kind to me in the past, and his mother is really in need of someone to take care of him when she is sick and hospitalized. After I discussed it with my mother-in-law, she also supported me to help out. "Helping people is the right way, you can go, I can do it alone. The mother-in-law said.
During the day, I helped take care of my aunt's daily life, diet, change dressings, etc., although my aunt spoke little, she was polite to me. Li Jian came to replace me after work, and I went back to his house to rest in the evening. Li Jian is worried about my hard work, so he will have a sumptuous dinner every day, and buy some fruits and nutritional products for me from time to time.
"Auntie's illness is getting better day by day, really thanks to you. I don't know how to thank you. Li Jian said.
I waved my hand: "It's all family, don't be so polite." I also thank your mother for taking care of me when she was sick, otherwise I would have nothing to do at home, but now I have something to do. ”
"Hehe, too. But it's still hard for you. Don't be so polite at my house these days, just tell me if you need anything, I'll make you what you want to eat tonight?" Li Jian asked thoughtfully.
"I like everything you do, you call the shots. I replied with a smile. As the days passed, I gradually became familiar with the hospital and Li Jian's home. Li Jian's parents divorced at an early age, and he lived alone in an old house and took care of himself. I found that Li Jian was much more mature and stable than before, and he was more considerate and attentive to me.
One day, my aunt suddenly said that she wanted to eat the snacks of her hometown. I knew that Li Jian was busy with work, so I volunteered to go to the sausage shop and buy some for my aunt. My aunt ate to her heart's content, and praised me for my ingenuity, which was more than her son's ability to take care of people. I smiled and said, "I'm just trying to do my best to compliment me too much." ”
When Li Jian came back from work that night, his aunt excitedly told him that I had gone to buy powder sausages. Li Jian immediately came to me, held my hand with both hands and said excitedly: "Mei'er, you are so good!
I was a little embarrassed and gently withdrew my hand: "It's nothing, I'll just stop by to do a favor, you're too exaggerated." ”
"How could it be, where did I find such a caring person before? I wasn't good enough for you at the beginning, so you chose to leave me. But now that I'm older, I'll treat you well, and I'll treat you better in the future!" Li Jian said seriously.
I was stunned and felt a little embarrassed: "Li Jian, let it pass the original incident." I'm married now, and you have to do it yourself. ”
Li Jian seemed to realize that his words were serious, and hurriedly apologized: "I'm sorry, I'm too excited." Don't worry, I don't mean anything other than to thank you. ”
Li Jian was overjoyed and thanked him repeatedly. I called my mother-in-law to report it, and she understood my good intentions. The car that could be transferred to the hospital had not arrived for a long time, and my aunt needed to sleep late at night, so Li Jian asked me to spend the night in the ward. I was hesitant to go home, but considering my aunt's condition and age, I decided to stay and take care of her.
At noon, I came to the hospital as usual to take care of my aunt. Unexpectedly, Li Jian also took a half-day off to come over. He looked tired, and I guess he probably didn't sleep well last night.
"Thank you for your hard work, you must be very tired from accompanying your aunt last night, right?" Li Jian's tone was a little depressed.
"It's okay, you're too outward. It's nothing. I laughed.
"Mer, thank you for always helping me like this. I really need you so much. Li Jian said.
In fact, these days, I have gradually realized that Li Jian's feelings for me seem to have exceeded the boundaries of friends. The care, dependence, and nostalgia he exudes from time to time are all full of unfinished tenderness. I'm not sure if it was his intention, or if it was just a moment of loneliness and cognitive error. But in any case, I must firmly reject him, lest the friendship end up hurting.
In the evening, the aunt's condition suddenly deteriorated, and the number alarm went off non-stop. The doctor immediately came to check and said that he had to be admitted for key treatment. Li Jian nervously asked the doctor how the situation was, and the doctor told the aunt that she had entered a dangerous period, and the next day or two was the key.
"Mei'er, my mother is in critical condition, can you stay and accompany her tonight? Li Jian pleaded as he held my hand with red eyes.
I hesitated. My mother-in-law still needs me to take care of her health, and I don't want to be alone with Li Jian. But seeing his nervous and helpless look, I nodded and agreed.
That night, Li Jian always waited silently in front of his aunt's bed. I cheered up and watched my aunt's situation all the time. At two or three o'clock in the morning, it was quiet, Li Jian suddenly spoke, and his voice was choked: "Mei'er, I couldn't keep you at the beginning, it's my life."
I looked at Li Jian in amazement, his eyes full of anticipation and affection. I gently held his hand and slowly spoke: "Li Jian, I know that you need companionship and support now, so you have such thoughts. But we have already gone through the path of affection, I now have my own family and responsibilities, and you have to learn to control your heart as well. No matter what, I will always be your best friend and will support you in your most difficult times. But you still have to put aside the thoughts you shouldn't have, okay?"
Li Jian was silent, and after a long time he whispered, "I know, Mei'er." I was so selfish. Rest assured, I will not do anything to hurt you and your family. As long as you can stay with my mother, I'll be satisfied. ”
I breathed a sigh of relief and advised him to go home and go to bed earlier. Li Jian nodded and left alone. This night, my heart could not be calmed for a long time.
After two days, my aunt's condition finally improved. Li Jian and I both breathed a sigh of relief, and planned to be discharged from the hospital after a few more days of observation. That evening, after seeing off the doctor, Li Jian suddenly said to me solemnly: "Mei'er, I think a lot. I can't force you, but I really love you dearly. In this life and this life, you are the most important person in my heart. No matter what difficulties you encounter in the future, I will support you behind you. ”
I looked at the deep affection in Li Jian's eyes and whispered, "Li Jian, I understand your mind. Emotional matters can't be forced, and you should also do it for yourself
for the sake of happiness. No matter what difficulties you encounter in the future, I will support you as a friend. But Wang Qiang and I have become husband and wife, and this is the most important family in my life. So, with regard to what you said, I think it's better to let it stay in the friendship of friends. You also have to be happy and continue to look forward, and I believe that you will meet your own happiness. ”
Li Jian was silent for a few seconds, then squeezed out a smile and said, "Well, you're right, I'm too willful. In any case, I'm happy to meet you. Let's be best friends forever!"
I breathed a sigh of relief, patted his hand lightly and said, "It's okay, you'll be fine." We've always been good friends. ”
The night before my aunt was discharged from the hospital, Li Jian suddenly called me and said in an excited tone that he had encountered new difficulties, some complicated family and relationship problems, and asked me if I could come out and talk to him. I hesitated, but I refused, because I didn't want to give him any ambiguous signals that might be misunderstood. Li Jian was disappointed and hung up the phone. I stood in front of the window, looking into the distance.
I sent my aunt back to her house alone and explained her daily life, diet and medicine. When I was about to leave, my aunt took me for lunch before leaving. Before leaving, she praised me for being a good and virtuous girl and told me to take care of my health. I suddenly felt a little like crying, so I whispered goodbye to my aunt and hurried away.
When I got home, I told my mother-in-law about my experiences over the past few days. My mother-in-law looked at me lovingly and said I was doing a good job and handling it just right. She said that after all, emotional matters should still be put first by her family. I leaned into my mother-in-law's arms, and tears finally came out of my eyes.
I told this story to my mother-in-law, and I couldn't calm down for a long time. I often think of Li Jian's lonely eyes and choked tone, and I wonder how he will face those difficulties when he is alone. I wanted to call him, but every time I picked up my phone, I hesitated to put it down.
A month has passed in a blink of an eye, and Li Jian has not contacted me again, and I don't know what his mother's situation is. In the evening of that day, I suddenly received a call from Li Jian: "Mei'er, how are you lately? I've come back from a business trip, do you have time to meet?"
I hesitated, but agreed to meet. That night, I went to the café we frequented and saw that Li Jian was already sitting inside. He was pale, tired, and not dressed as energetically as before.
"Where have you been on a business trip? I haven't been in touch for a month, is your mother okay?" I asked with concern.
"I went to the UK and had a project to work on. My mom is in good health and I've found an aunt to take care of her. Li Jian smiled reluctantly.
"That's good, you have to pay attention to your body yourself, and you don't seem to be in good shape. ”
"I'm fine, maybe it's just a little more stressful. But when I see you, I feel much more relaxed. Li Jian's eyes warmed up.
I knew he still couldn't forget me, but I wanted him to think about himself, so I changed the subject and chatted with him about some daily life.
After sending Li Jian away, my heart couldn't calm down for a long time. So much has happened in the past month that Li Jian and I can't be ordinary friends again. Although the result was as I had hoped, the heartache and melancholy seemed to be fixed between us.
I took the envelope, and my mother-in-law gave me a warm hug before leaving. I slowly opened the envelope, and inside was a letter from Li Jian, as well as a piece of paper with an account number and password written on it.
Li Jian said in the letter that this was the deposit he was going to give me as a wedding gift, and he hoped that I would accept it
He gave his last bit of care. He said thank you for the warmth and support I gave him in his most difficult time, a friendship that he will remember for the rest of his life. He said that after much deliberation, he decided to accept the fact that we can only be friends and will try to find a new beginning for himself. He blessed me and Wang Qiang with a happy old age. In the end, he said that he would leave the city to live in a new place for a while, and then come back when his mood calmed down.
Although Li Jian's words in the letter were calm, I could tell that he was going through great heartache and struggle. I also felt very uncomfortable, holding the piece of paper for a long time and unable to make a decision.
I begged my mother-in-law to keep this matter secret and not to tell Wang Qiang, but my mother-in-law nodded lovingly. I knew that the damage caused to Li Jian was irreparable, but I had no other way. On the road of life, I have to choose the one that suits me best, even if it hurts some feelings in the process.
Since then, Li Jian has never taken the initiative to contact me. I occasionally see some updates from his circle of friends and know that he seems to be doing well, and that's enough. Time flies, and Wang Qiang's life and I are still as happy and sad as before. And that experience has gradually become a faint scenery in my life memory.