#文章首发挑战赛#
"You graduated from a prestigious university at the age of 37, and you went back to the countryside to find a job, didn't get married, and gnawed at home, what do you want to do? How do you know that the son is unconvinced: "You know money, you know marriage, that's what you want, not what I want." ”
When my father heard this, he was angry: "I have provided for you to go to college for more than 20 years, and you have finally confessed, what is it if you don't work or get married? Do you know that the village says that our family has confessed a waste, and my face has been lost?"
This son who gnaws at home is Li Mingming, who has studied for a doctorate at Southwest University for 9 years, and in the eyes of outsiders, this is a big doctor. So why did Li Mingming, a high-achieving student, choose to turn a blind eye to his family and gnaw at home for 4 years in the face of his family's poverty and no money to see his parents' illness? What happened to him that he studied for a doctorate for 9 years?
The only way out is to read
Li Mingliang was born in 1980 in an ordinary family in Hunan, and his ancestors were farmers and had little culture. The family background is average, the parents live on farming, and the income is meager, but they are very fond of this son, because Li Mingliang is smart and obedient, and his grades in school are always among the best, whether it is in the village or at home, they all think that this child is a seed of reading, maybe he is the first college student in the clan, and the key to changing the fate of the family.
In this way, Li Mingliang has been pinned on by his parents and clan since he was a child, and for them, reading is the only chance to change their fate. Li Mingliang also knew, so he cherished the opportunity to study very much, and the award certificate at home was pasted on the whole wall. Li Mingliang also has a younger sister under him, and her Xi is also very good, and the family provides for two students, which is very difficult for the peasant family.
So Li's father and mother have to do odd jobs in addition to farming, but this is not a long-term solution, as Li Mingliang's brothers and sisters get older, the expenses are getting bigger and bigger, and their parents can only barely provide for one person to go to school. In the end, the parents let their daughter who was still in elementary school drop out of school, and her younger sister was young, so she did housework at home.
Born in a farming family, Li Mingliang experienced the hardships of his parents, but he never endured hardships, and his parents hoped that he would devote all his energy to studying Xi. Li Mingliang lived up to this expectation and was admitted to a local key high school in junior high school. During the college entrance examination, he was admitted to a well-known 985 university in Changsha and became the first college student in his family, which made his parents face up in the village.
And this year, Li Mingliang was only 17 years old, and at the age of 17, he was admitted to a 985 school. During college, Li Mingliang still maintained an efficient Xi efficiency and was able to get scholarships every year, which was also a great burden on his family. Because of his excellent performance, Li Mingliang was escorted to the university for a master's degree in his senior year.
During his graduate studies, Li Mingliang still performed very well, and his tutor saw him as a talent, and suggested that he could continue to study for a doctorate in this school, and the school also retained him, hoping that he could stay in school to teach in the future, so that his work and study Xi would not be delayed, and it could greatly reduce the burden on his family, but Li Mingliang refused, he wanted to change the environment to continue his studies.
In 2004, 24-year-old Li Mingliang was admitted to Southwest University, and after the news reached Li Mingliang's hometown, it immediately caused a sensation, and there were few college students in their village. What's more, it is a big doctor, everyone says that Li Mingliang is amazing, and his parents and family will definitely follow him to enjoy happiness in the future.
When Li's father and mother heard the words of the villagers, they were modest, but the smile on their faces never stopped. Although they prefer that their son get married and have children as soon as possible to inherit the incense, since his son is so capable, he still gritted his teeth for him to study.
However, from 2004 to 2013, Li Mingliang never went home once during his 9 years of doctoral study, in order to provide him with a study, the family was still an old house more than ten years ago, very dilapidated in the village, and there was no phone or mobile phone, his parents could only call him through the commissary, but Li Mingliang always hung up the phone in a hurry, and basically did not go out to call his parents. Although the parents miss their son, they feel that their studies are still important and are very considerate of Li Mingming.
After 9 years of studying for a doctorate, this matter also spread in the township, and some people began to say sour things, saying that Li Mingliang must not have completed his doctorate, otherwise it would be impossible to study for 9 years, although Li's father also had doubts, what school should be studied for 9 years? But he thought that the people in the village were purely jealous.
Hui Village
In 2013, Li Mingliang was 33 years old, an absolute young man. The parents in their hometown attach great importance to the succession, and they always urge Li Mingliang to talk about a girlfriend first. One day, Li Mingliang suddenly called and said that he wanted to go home to visit his parents, and he would send all his books home, hoping that his parents could pay for the logistics fee.
The parents were very happy when they heard about it, they hadn't seen their son for 9 years, and now that they are home, they must take a good look. According to the appointed time, Li Mingming's married sister went to the rental car to pick him up, and at the same time brought Li Mingliang a book to mail. After arriving at the place, my sister was dumbfounded, there were more than 50 bags of books, and the logistics fee alone cost more than 3,000, and I had to rent a car to bring these books back to my hometown, and my sister paid nearly 4,000 yuan in advance.
However, after returning home, many villagers came to see the big doctor, thinking that this was the big doctor's return to his hometown and his clothes. Who knows, Li Mingliang went home and just said hello to his parents, then went back to the house and closed the door.
This was very rude, which made the villagers very embarrassed, but Li's father thought that Li Mingliang was too tired from the long journey to do such a rude thing. The crowd was bored and dispersed. In the evening, the Li family prepared a sumptuous table, but Li Mingliang refused to attend because he had no appetite.
The parents wanted to ask about the changes in their son in the past 9 years, but they knew that this was the result. After dinner, Li Mingliang also refused to talk to his parents, Li's father and Li's mother's love for their son was undoubted, even if he was 33 years old, they felt that Li Mingliang was too tired, so they didn't bother him.
For a period of time after that, Li Mingliang rarely went out of the house except for eating, drinking, and Lazar, so that many villagers thought that Li Mingliang had left his hometown. And Li Mingliang holds his books every day to read, for these books, Li Mingliang is regarded as a treasure, not allowed others to touch it, as soon as he touches it, Li Mingliang gets angry.
After seeing it for a month, Li Mingliang's father was anxious, and his son had little communication with him since he returned home, and he didn't go out every day, so what plans did he have for the future? On this day, Li's father found Li Mingliang and asked: "Son, when do you plan to work?" When do you plan to get married, your mother and I have been waiting for many years to hold our grandson. ”
His father's words made Li Mingliang silent for a while, he didn't say much, just said: "After so many years Xi of studying, I am very tired, and I want to rest for a while." Looking at Li Mingming, who was silent and had a strange expression, Li's father swallowed back all the words in his stomach, and Li Mingliang returned to the house and closed the door.
However, a few months have passed, Li Mingliang is still at home every day, without the slightest intention of going to work or getting married, Li's father was anxious again, and asked: "What are your plans, you are 33 years old, you are a doctor, what is the matter with being at home every day? Have you considered work or marriage?"
Li Mingliang was very impatient: "I'm not in a hurry, what are you anxious about?" Of course Li's father is in a hurry, he is almost 60 years old, others are as old as him, they have already been in the same house for three generations, and their grandchildren are all in high school. And now his son is 33 years old and not married. In order to provide for Li Mingliang to go to school, the poor family can't look at it, it is still an old tiled house 20 years ago, and now the village is basically a bungalow or a two-story small building, and there are only a few broken tiled houses like theirs.
Speaking of which, outsiders think that Li Mingliang is a big doctor, and he returned to his hometown purely because he didn't go home for 9 years and missed his parents. I didn't know that after returning home, I stayed in the house all the time, didn't go out, didn't work, and there was all kinds of gossip in the village. Of course, Li Mingliang couldn't hear it, it was Li Mingliang's parents who endured it.
Li Mingliang has been in school for more than 20 years, and his family still owes foreign debts, and he has no money to marry him. Now the whole family is counting on Li Mingliang, who knows that Li Mingliang is not in a hurry at all. It's okay to work and get married, and his sister helped him pay more than 3,000 logistics fees, and Li Mingliang didn't mean to pay it back.
In order to provide for Li Mingliang's university, his father injured his body, and now he can only farm at home and do some light odd jobs, but Li Mingliang does not go to work with sound limbs, reads at home every day, lives on his parents, and gnaws on his old parents.
Li Mingliang also became a shame in the clan from the pride of the clan, the elders and neighbors persuaded him, he always ignored him, and always made movements with strange expressions, as soon as his parents said Li Mingliang, Li Mingliang quarreled with his parents: "Work, marriage, you just think about this, you only have money in your eyes, and you don't think about my feelings at all." ”
The quarrel was intense, Li Mingliang also started to beat his parents, his parents raised Li Mingliang who went to school for more than 30 years, and now Li Mingliang is in his thirties, and he still has to rely on his parents to live, so that his parents pay off their debts by themselves, save money and frugality, and can only carry it when they are sick, and have no money to go to the doctor. From 2013 to 2017, Li Mingliang gnawed at home for 4 years, quarreled with his parents many times, and beat his parents.
One day in 2017, Li's father suddenly fainted while working in the fields and was carried home by the villagers, but Li Mingliang didn't even show his face and was still locked in the house to read. Not only outsiders, but even the Li family thinks that Li Mingliang is stupid to study, and Li's father is even more chilled, it is said that Li Mingliang has been smart and obedient since he was a child, and he gets scholarships every year during his undergraduate and master's degrees, and he is very considerate of his family and often calls his parents.
But after studying for the doctorate, his temperament changed greatly, not only did he not contact his family, he did not go home during the 9-year doctoral study, and now he does not recognize his six relatives.
What happened to Li Mingliang during his nine-year doctoral studies? At the suggestion of the villagers, Li's father approached the media, hoping to learn about what happened to Li Mingliang during his nine years.
The reason for the great change in Li Mingming's temperament
After the reporter came to Li Mingliang's house, they were very interested in him, and the villagers said that Li Mingliang was a doctor, with sound limbs and no shortage of IQ, it is said that the Li family was poor and not decent, Li Mingliang did not gnaw the capital of the old lying flat, so why was he unwilling to go out to work?
In the face of reporters' questions, Li Mingliang was very resistant, his expression was very strange and confused from time to time, and he made inappropriate movements. Seeing that Li Mingliang was reluctant to say, the reporter could only contact Southwest University and learned the reason for Li Mingming's great change from Li Mingliang's counselor and the school building manager.
It turned out that after Li Mingliang studied for his Ph.D., he still worked as hard as before, and he didn't dare to slack off at all, because he was carrying the hope of the family, and when his roommates ate and socialized together, Li Mingliang was either in the library or on the way to the library.
At the same time, there is a roommate who is too enthusiastic, often talks in the dormitory, even at night, he only cares about himself, and his voice is very loud, these are noises in Li Mingming's ears, Li Mingliang has a bad rest, often impetuous, and after a long time, he is depressed, and he often does not say a word for several days, and the pressure on his shoulders makes Li Mingliang suffer from serious mental illness.
As a result, Li Mingliang was unable to concentrate on completing his studies, and his graduation thesis was not written, and Li Mingliang did not submit his doctoral dissertation during the 6 years of his graduation.
9 years of time was wasted like this, and the reporter was very embarrassed when he heard this, since Li Mingliang's roommate was so irritable, why didn't he bring it up directly, or change the dormitory, in order to understand the situation, the reporter invited a psychological counselor. Under the guidance of the counselor, Li Mingliang opened his heart.
Li Mingliang said that during his Ph.D., he suffered from a serious mental illness, often suffering from headaches and insomnia, which needed to be relieved by medication. His father always called and asked how his Xi was and how his body was, which made Li Mingliang very stressed, especially when he was getting older and about to leave society, Li Mingliang was very confused, he didn't know what he had to face.
As a result, Li Mingliang, who has been unwilling to face society and reality for a long time, is unwilling to submit papers, nor does he want to socialize with others, let alone work, and his parents only care about his work and marriage, and no one cares about his psychology. At this time, the psychological counselor understood that Li Mingliang was under too much pressure all year round, coupled with his own social phobia, as well as mental illness, afraid of socializing with others, afraid of facing reality, and the summary was that too much pressure overwhelmed him.
This is a mental illness, not a physical illness, and recovery takes a long time. Li Mingming's parents should know that their son has a mental illness, which is caused by too much expectation and pressure from his family, and they regret it very much. But at this time, it was too late, and he could only choose to take his son for treatment, and the reporter looked at this dilapidated home and Li's father with a wrinkled face and gray hair.
Li Mingming, a high-IQ talent, could have made a career, but it turned out to be ruined like this, which is a pity. After that, Li Mingming's parents pooled money and borrowed money while working, and took Li Mingliang to seek medical treatment everywhere, hoping to cure their son's illness. But Li Mingliang is sometimes good and bad, he can't be completely independent at all, and he can't go out to work, so he can only gnaw at home, and now, Li Mingliang has completely become the laughing stock of the village.
This tragedy once again tells us that as parents, we should not only care about their children's academic Xi grades, but also take into account their children's mental health and independent personality development, and do not put too much pressure on their children. Finally, it is hoped that similar tragedies will not happen again.
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