"The Same Star" is a documentary work directed by Quan Yintao, who filmed the very different lives of two autistic children, Zheng Senyou and Lin Jiajun. Under the full support of his grandmother, Mori Yu entered an ordinary school to integrate, and his talents such as piano, guitar, and painting were not left behind, and Jiajun, who was 2 years younger than Mori You, had a bad fate and was trapped at home with a chain in his short life.
After watching the documentary, people can't help but think that we have a certain misunderstanding about the prognosis of autistic children, and think that the child's own degree of impairment is likely to determine his future quality of life..... These external factors can bring more possibilities to his life.
It is no wonder that in the US DSM-5, the severity of autism is divided according to the degree of need for help: mild autism is manifested as a need for help, moderate autism requires a lot of help, and people with severe autism need a very large amount of social support.
The word "support" is so light to say, and it is a continuous advocacy to the public and a call for attention at the government level. "As long as you want, as long as I have it. Do my best, do my best", every autistic parent wants to give their children the same abundant love, are doing their best, I hope every star can grow up healthily under the care!
"The Same Star"
"It's over, another debt collector"
Lin Jiajun is one of the protagonists of the film, he was 13 years old when the film was filmed, and in order to prevent him from running out of the house and hurting people, his family locked him in his home with a chain since he was 12 years old.
Lin Jiajun
Locking Lin Jiajun is a helpless move of the family, the other end of the chain is connected to a stone mill of nearly 100 catties, the stone mill was not fixed before, Lin Jiajun will drag the stone mill around, and sometimes he will be injured by the stone mill, and then the family fixed the stone mill on the floor with steel bars. The length of the chain is about 2 meters, which is also the largest range of movement Lin Jiajun usually has at home, and his mother Lin Yugui usually stays at home with her son.
Lin Jiajun has a total of four people in his family, in addition to Lin Jiajun who can't go out, Lin Yugui has a disability in his legs, plus he has to take care of Lin Jiajun, there is no way to go out to make money, Lin Jiajun also has a younger sister in school, and the family relies on his father to work alone to make money. In order to be able to hold Lin Jiajun in time, his father didn't dare to go far, so he could only do odd jobs near home.
Locking up autistic children with chains is not the best way to help them, but it is the best solution that this family can think of, Lin Yugui actually can't bear it, "Lock a dog at least won't be so distressed...... Because he is a human being, we can't lock him up like a dog, and we can't treat him like a dog, after all, he is a living person. ”
Mother Lin Yugui
When he was 3 years old, his parents discovered Lin Jiajun's abnormality, he couldn't speak, and "more active than normal age", Lin Yugui recalled, he would destroy everything he could touch, and when he was 4 or 5 years old, his parents took him to the hospital to see a doctor, and they went to hospitals in Zhangzhou and Xiamen successively, and the doctor suspected that it was autism, but Lin Yugui didn't know what autism was at that time.
In the end, the doctor at Fuzhou Children's Hospital made a diagnosis, and Lin Yugui always remembered what the doctor said at that time, "It's over, another debt collector, another autistic child has come out." ”
After the diagnosis, his parents took Lin Jiajun to intervene in Fuzhou Children's Hospital for 3 months, and his condition improved, and he began to speak simple words such as father, mother, and apple, and his parents saw hope. But the monthly intervention costs thousands of yuan, which is an "astronomical amount" that Lin Jiajun's family cannot afford, so they have no choice but to go home.
In the plan, Lin Yugui planned to go home to teach Lin Jiajun in person, and then go to the hospital regularly for treatment, but as Lin Jiajun got older and his strength became more and more, Lin Yugui, who was already in poor health, became more and more unable to hold his son. When Lin Jiajun was 7 years old, his sister was born, which made Lin Yugui even less energetic to discipline his son.
When he was 7 or 8 years old, Lin Jiajun began to run out to grab other people's things, and the neighbors were very dissatisfied with Lin Jiajun's parents, complaining that they didn't know how to discipline their children, "Some people are saying, what are you parents, you shouldn't teach your children to come out and rob if you are poor." Lin Yugui was also helpless, "It wasn't my intention for the child to grab things, and I couldn't control him." ”
Later, Lin Jiajun developed aggression again, began to throw stones at others, and sometimes was beaten outside, Lin Yugui still remembers the feeling of being disgusted by his neighbors. "I walked out, as if all the eyes that despised you would come to me. In desperation, his parents had no choice but to lock Lin Jiajun at home.
When Lin Jiajun was locked in the house, Zheng Senyou was experiencing a different life under the guidance of his grandmother.
Children with special needs are an educational resource in their own right
Senyou's story should be familiar to everyone, grandma Xu Ping did her best to support it, so that Senyou could enter the school and get the opportunity to get an education. I heard that playing the piano and drawing can develop the left and right brains of children, so I took Moriyou to learn Xi different talents, and Moriyou also worked hard, and with his own ability, he got the opportunity to play on the same stage with the pianist Lang Lang.
Luckily for Billy, Moritomo found a school that was willing to accept him.
Tomo Ikumori
Senyou reached the age of going to school, Xu Ping began to help him find a suitable school, she looked at a total of two public schools, a private school, but were rejected, under the recommendation of others, she tried to take Senyou to Beijing Normal University Nanao Experimental School, at first, she was very worried, "I am a little afraid to come, because the conditions of this school are a little too good, I am afraid that those rich children look down on Senyou." ”
When he went to school for the first time, Xu Ping took Senyou to meet the principal Zheng Tiejun, and before Zheng Tiejun could say hello to Senyou, Senyou screamed and ran away. Xu Ping didn't have much hope, but the result was unexpected by Xu Ping, and the principal said, let's give it a try. Originally, my grandmother planned to drop out of school with Mori if she hadn't adapted for a month, but she tried to graduate from junior high school this time.
Zheng Tiejun, President of Nanao Experimental School of Beijing Normal University
Moritomo is not the first special child accepted by this school, before him, there was a child with sequelae of cerebral palsy, who could not take care of himself when he first entered the school, and sometimes pulled in his pants. I also like to shake my head and slap my head in class, and when parents know about it, they will feel that this child has affected other children in the class.
In the face of the dissatisfaction of classmates and parents, the school teachers did not rush to deal with this "problem" child, but to guide the parents. The child's homeroom teacher personally wrote a letter to explain the child's situation to other parents, and slowly guided the parents to accept such a child, "Every child has the right to be educated, and we must respect it, and the existence of these children is actually a kind of education for other students." ”
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, Zheng Tiejun also once asked the faculty and staff who oppose special children: "If your child is a special child, what do you want to get?"
"Who can guarantee that our own child will always be a strong person, who may be vulnerable in some way sometimes. Each of us wants more love, tolerance and acceptance in this society, so why don't we all do such things?"
The essence of education is that one tree shakes another, Zheng Tiejun said, Senyou is also an educational resource, he can let children of the same age know that there are many kinds of people in the world, know how to get along with children like Senyou, "We can't screen and filter out children, just put the same children together." ”
Moritomo who entered the school is also influencing his classmates, many of whom have been classmates with Moritomo since the first grade of elementary school, and Moritomo's versatility has also made him a role model for his classmates.
"I've known Mori for almost 8 years, and I never thought he was any different from us, he was young before, and then because he had a good relationship, I thought he was no different from us. ”
"Senyou is very talented in music, he knows more musical instruments than ordinary people, and he knows more talents, which is his own shining point, and I don't agree with the idea that autism is a fool. ”
Moritomo's classmates
Parents are also unconsciously, influenced by Senyou, Xu Ping said, parents of other children also often teach their children, how to accept special children like Senyou, they also said, I hope their children understand that they are lucky, because there are people in the world like Senyou, "in order to be able to live independently, for a position in the struggle."
Same stars, different destinies
The story of Sen You and Lin Jiajun seems to be two extremes, Lin Jiajun was chained to the old house, and Lin Yugui was also locked in the old house together in order to take care of his son, and the lives of the two seemed to be at a glance. And in Moritomo's story, there are lows and highlights.
When he first went to school, Moriyou couldn't control himself well, because there were few opportunities to contact people before, and when there were many people in the class, he couldn't help but shout because he was nervous, and when he was sleepy in class, he would lie down directly on the floor of the classroom, and when he was hungry, he would directly fish for bones from the soup pot in the cafeteria and eat.
When Xu Ping wanted to give up, Zheng Tiejun persuaded her and asked her to take Senyou to adapt again. This school has given Senyou the greatest tolerance, and Senyou has slowly grown up in this tolerance.
In the fifth and sixth grades, Senyou can go to school by himself, after entering junior high school, he learned to sit quietly in the classroom to attend class, in Zheng Tiejun's view, Senyou's change is the result of education, "Senyou is a very, very good example, get the care of classmates' parents and teachers, self-confidence building, although he can not express it well, but his state and interaction with classmates, the way of dealing with conflicts, all show that he has benefited from it." ”
Sen You and Xu Ping run in the playground
After graduating from school, Senyou entered a vocational and technical school in Guangzhou to continue his Xi, and in 2021, Senyou graduated and entered the society, and a garment factory recruited him into the factory to do simple jobs such as shipping and sorting out warehouses. Xu Ping also made a longer-term plan for Senyou, and now she will regularly take Senyou to the hospital to volunteer to play the piano, if one day she is not healthy, at least Senyou will not have nothing to do.
Seeing the growth and changes of Senyou, many people will sigh like Zheng Tiejun, "It turns out that a life can unfold like this." ”
Lin Jiajun's life of being chained also found a key to unlock.
In 2016, the local government learned of Lin Jiajun's family and helped him arrange for experts to help the family. Xiao Qiang, who was the president of Fuzhou Shenkang Hospital at the time, judged that Lin Jiajun not only suffered from autism, but also was likely to have pervasive developmental disorders.
Lin Jiajun's violent behavior is likely to be due to his long-term boring and disorderly life, coupled with the fact that he is bound by iron chains and cannot be relieved of his emotions, which leads to his hurtful behavior.
It's a pity that at the age of 16, he has missed the best recovery period, and it is likely that he will not be able to return to normal life in this life, "At present, we are only controlling his emotions and controlling his behavior, and we are trying to find a way to untie the chains from him, so that he can at least get a kind of dignity as a normal person." ”
Later, with the help of the local government, Lin Jiaju was sent to Xiamen Xianyue Hospital for rehabilitation, and everything seemed to be getting better, but at the end of the film, I saw such a message, "Lin Jiajun's child died unexpectedly on September 13, 2017."
is also a child of the stars, Senyou seems to be luckier than Lin Jiajun at every stage of his life, with the full protection of his grandmother, the careful teaching of his teachers, and the support of his classmates, he finally graduated successfully and found a job. But he also experienced the darkest moments, when he first went to school, he was considered a "nervous disease", and the care of his boss after work also caused a gap between him and his co-workers.
Many parents are also worried, what will happen to my children after I die? Autistic children are not enough to rely on the efforts of parents, but also need to have enough tolerance and support, each child is unique, but many times, outsiders can only see their differences from themselves, and it is difficult to find their shining points. Senyou's luck also lies in this, Xu Ping took him to find an environment that was inclusive enough to give him a chance to take root.
Pedigree children have thousands of faces, and on the right soil, there may be a chance to bloom, and just like Zheng Tiejun's blessing to Senyou, I hope that special children can live happily based on their own circumstances.