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My name is Li Yang, I retired this year, and I have a pension of 2,000 yuan. I have two children, the eldest son is named Li Ming, who works in Beijing; The youngest son's name is Li Gang and he works in Shanghai. My wife and I discussed it and decided to stay at their house for half a year.
"Old man, pack up, let's take the high-speed train to Beijing the day after tomorrow!" My wife said happily. "Okay! See my son's new house!" I also came to the spirit.
I was actually a little apprehensive. My son has just bought a new house, will he dislike us and get in the way? Will we be a burden to them? But for the sake of my children, I decided to put these thoughts behind me and help them as long as they need it.
Two days later, we dragged the big bags and small bags to Ming's son's new home in Beijing.
"Mom and Dad, you've come all the way here. I've got you in this room. Just let me know if you need anything. "Son Ming greeted us warmly. I looked at Mingyang and his beautiful and capable wife, as well as the lovely granddaughter who had just entered elementary school, and I couldn't help but feel hot.
Living with Ming's son, I found that he was already a very good person. I am so busy at work every day, and I often work overtime, but I always greet him with a smile when I come home. I'm so relieved that my son has grown up.
One day, Ming's son sighed and said, "Dad, I'm too busy with work, and I've been a little overwhelmed lately." I heard from a colleague that there is a hot spring resort on the outskirts of the city, and I want to go to a hot spring on the weekend to relax. ”
I took the initiative to say, "You can go with ease, we have us! It is very important for you and your wife to relax and adjust your emotions." When Ming's son heard this, he was overjoyed and thanked him again and again.
At the end of the half-year period, Ming's son's wife smiled and said to us: "Mom and Dad, let's not live for another year, it's really comfortable to have you." ”
When I think of the good times we had as a family of three in the past six months, I can't help but feel a little reluctant. But after thinking about it, Gang is also our sweetheart, and we should also accompany him.
So I said gently: "Good daughter, you and Ming'er have worked hard for half a year. It's time for us to go to Shanghai to see our son. It is inconvenient for him to eat and live outside alone. You have to take care of yourselves and your precious granddaughter!" Although Ming's son and his wife were a little disappointed, they also understood our choice.
When I came to Shanghai, I was a little disappointed by my son's attitude.
"You can stay here. I'm so busy with work that I can't take care of you. Just take care of your own food and drink, and I will give you living expenses every month. The son said very coldly.
I was disappointed, I didn't expect my son to be so indifferent. We are his parents, but we are treated as outsiders. I think of Ming's son's home, their care for us and the little things in our daily lives. Only then did I realize that raising children to prevent old age cannot only look at the results, but also the process is more important.
So I took the initiative to take over the work of my son's family. Grocery shopping, cooking, laundry and cooking, no one dislikes or appreciates it, but I still do it silently. Sometimes when my son comes home late at night, he still smiles when he sees the supper on the table. I know he's happy, he just can't express it. I want to give him more parental love, even if he doesn't appreciate it now.
One night, my son came back from overtime and saw me having a supper on the table. "Dad, you don't have to cook so late, rest early. Gang Son said. "I'm not tired, son, eat more!" I said with a smile.
Hearing my son's concern, my heart warmed. I know he's slowly coming to us, and that's enough for me.
Before leaving Shanghai, my son said to me, "Dad, thank you for taking care of me for the past six months." I'll take good care of myself. You and your mom should also pay attention to their bodies. ”
I saw the gratitude in my son's eyes, and the stone in my heart finally landed. I know that he finally opened his heart and relied on his parents like a child. Blood is thicker than water, and there is no right or wrong in family affection, only giving and receiving.
I hugged my son hard and said goodbye to him. This year's journey has given me a glimpse of the true meaning of raising children and preventing old age. We will take this warmth with us to start a new retirement life.
After saying goodbye to my son, my wife and I returned to our hometown.
"Old man, this year we can be regarded as having learned what it means to raise children and prevent old age. My wife said with emotion. "Yes, family affection ultimately depends on mutual understanding and giving, not just money exchanges. "I agree.
Looking back on my life with my two sons over the past year, I am filled with emotion. Ming's son is warm and thoughtful, making our old man extremely warm; My son was cold and polite, but I also felt a change in his heart. As a parent, I don't hold my children to any standards, I just want them to be healthy and happy.
Life after retirement is calm and relaxing. I often call to ask how my two sons are doing, and I like to watch my granddaughters grow up on video. In my spare time, my wife and I dance, play Go, and chat in the community, and the neighbors have a good relationship. We will also do volunteer work to help more elderly people in need.
One day, my son called, and his tone was a little excited: "Dad, my girlfriend has agreed to get married! I smiled and said, "Good son, Mom and I will come over right away!"
I was also very excited to hear that my son was so happy. I know that he has finally found true love and has learned to convey the joy in his heart, which is a sign of his maturity.
On the day of the wedding, the son came to see us with his new wife and said solemnly: "Mom, Dad, you will have a daughter-in-law to serve you in the future, don't work anymore!" The new daughter-in-law also smiled and said, "Mom and Dad, I will take care of Gang'er, don't worry!"
I happily hugged my son and his beautiful and kind bride. Just now that my son finally has his own small family, I can also take a back seat, which is very gratifying and down-to-earth.
After the wedding, we spent some time on vacation with our newlywed son. Seeing him gradually become a couple, we are relieved to return to our hometown and prepare for more retirement time. Life is too short, and I want to do my best to spend more time with my family and experience the joy of family.
After returning to my hometown, my wife and I returned to our former peace.
One morning, my wife excitedly said to me, "Old man, let's go on a trip too! Just the two of us, just like when we were young!" I smiled and nodded, "Okay, okay, we haven't hung out alone in a long time!"
Hearing my wife say this, I was also interested. When we were young, we often went on outings together, and the innocence of that time precipitated good memories in time. Now that the children are independent families, it is time for us to travel the world again while we are still strong.
So, we immediately started planning our trip. First of all, we chose Beidaihe, we can walk along the seaside and enjoy the sound of the sea and the bright sunshine; Then go to Sanya to rest in front of the coconut grove and the blue sea; Finally, go to Changbai Mountain to see the snow and feel the blood boiling in the ice and snow. The luggage is packed, the tickets are booked, and everything is set.
Before the trip, I happily said to my two sons: "Sons, your parents are going out to play for a while, you pay attention to your health, and call if you have something!" The two sons also said happily: "Mom and Dad, have fun!
I am very pleased with the thoughtfulness of the children. They can cherish our feelings when they start a family, and now we can travel happily without restrictions.
So, the two of us started a trip as soon as we go. In Beidaihe, we walked by the sea, blowing the sea breeze, looking for the memories of our youth. In Sanya, we soak in the hot springs in the bathroom, take a nap under the coconut grove, and walk on the beach at sunset. In Changbai Mountain, we were wrapped in thick cotton clothes and hats, playing in the snow, and enjoying the rare silver wraps.
"Wife, we've found our youthful feelings again along the way, haven't we?" I said with a smile. "Yes, let's go out more in the future and enjoy the joy of family!" My wife also smiled happily.
This journey made me see the renewed passion and vitality in my wife's eyes. We walked hand in hand, talking and laughing, as if we had stepped back in time to thirty years ago. I thank God for giving us the opportunity to grow old together, so that we can share the joy of family.
We will have more good times together. Family affection and friendship will enrich our later life. I firmly believe that as long as we maintain an optimistic and enterprising heart, we can live a fulfilling and happy retirement.
When I returned from my trip, I noticed that my wife's memory was gradually declining, and she often forgot what she had done, who and where.
Once, my wife stared at the actor's face on TV and said, "Isn't this our son Ming? I reminded with a wry smile: "Wife, our son's name is Li Ming, not this actor." You misremember. ”
I realized that my wife had a memory problem, which could be a precursor to Alzheimer's disease. Although I tried to pretend that nothing had happened, I was still nervous. We're all getting older, and our health is always declining, so I have to be prepared to take care of it in advance.
So I started silently adding various reminders and tips for my wife. I put pictures of our sons and daughters and friends on the wall, with their names on them. Write down the schedule in your wife's small notebook in advance; Constantly repeat the places we have been, the things we have done, activate his memory. I also made an appointment with the best doctor to check on my wife.
After the test results came back, the doctor said, "Your wife has mild Alzheimer's disease, and she needs to be accompanied more to activate her memory." Don't have too much psychological pressure, this is a normal physiological decline. I nodded, but I was anxious.
The news of my wife's illness saddened me. We have been growing old together for many years, and I have to take on the responsibility of taking care of her. Although the process will be difficult and painful, I will take care of her with all my love and patience. I can't leave her alone to face the disease.
From that day on, I began to seriously study how to take care of the elderly with dementia. I learned to do some brain-activating games and accompany her to do them; I told our story over and over again to help her recall; I write down her preferences, fix her habits, and give her the most familiar feeling. I also hired a caregiver and told the children about the situation of my wife so that they could be mentally prepared.
This became my most important task after retirement. I want to make my wife's last days full and beautiful, and leave no regrets. I will guard the memories and love between us until the end of time.
In order to take better care of my wife, I decided to take her to live in our hometown and countryside.
"Wife, let's go back to our hometown, the air is good over there, you can also walk around, it will be better than in the city." I persuaded softly. My wife was stunned for a moment, nodded and said, "Okay, I'll go wherever you say." ”
Seeing my wife's fading eyes, my heart fluttered. What a wise and capable woman she once was, but now she is delirious, and I wonder if she can still perceive my mind. But I will always be there for her until the day she forgets me.
When I arrived at the old house, I said to my wife, "Look, let's go home! My wife looked at it blankly and said, "Well, it's an apricot tree." I knew she hadn't really remembered, but held her hand with relief.
Life in the countryside is very quiet and peaceful. I took my wife for a slow walk on the field path, went to the back mountain to see the trees, and reminisced about the past in the old house. Sometimes she would have a fleeting memory, asking me "Have we ever been here", and I patiently accompanied her to reminisce, even if she forgot later. I always maintained hope and patience.
I also take my wife to move her muscles and bones to prevent her body from becoming ossified. We practiced Tai Chi under the trees, picked wild fruits in the ravines, and did some simple household chores. I asked my wife to move as much as possible, and her face often bloomed with a smile that I hadn't seen in a long time, and that was the most gratifying moment for me.
We will spend the rest of our lives in this country cottage until the end of time. I don't have any requirements, I just want to be with me.
Life in the countryside is stable and comfortable, and I do my best to take care of my wife's daily life.
One night, my wife suddenly asked me, "Who are you and how did I get to this place?" My heart ached but I still patiently said, "I am your wife, we have been together for decades, and now we live in our hometown." The wife nodded blankly and fell asleep again.
At this moment, my heart was like a knife. My wife's illness has worsened and she has gradually forgotten about me. But I didn't complain in the slightest, I just wanted to be by her side. I keep reminding myself to be patient, this is the test God has given her and me.
Occasionally, my wife will talk about me: "I seem to dream of a person who always takes care of me." I'll just say gently, "He must love you." Remember him. ”
I knew that the remaining memories were about to leave my wife. But listening to her occasionally mention it, I still feel comforted. This shows that the time we have walked together has not been completely erased by time, and those loves are still in her heart. I will always remember her, even though she can't remember me.
In order to help my wife exercise her memory, I made a "memory book" full of photos of us and a brief record of our experiences. I would go through the book every day and tell my wife our stories, even if she was just listening quietly. I believe these memories are still somewhere in her heart, even if they are deep, deep.