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My husband and I have been married for three years, and to be honest, I still had a good impression of his family at first. My parents-in-law are also very good to us, especially my mother-in-law, who often comes to the house to help me with housework, and sometimes takes the initiative to help me with the baby, so that I have time to do my own things. My husband and I are also a good match, love each other, and now we have a three-year-old son, Xiao Ming, and we live happily.
I thought my relationship with my mother-in-law would always be so good until recently when our family discussed buying a house. My husband thinks it's best to buy a school district house before the child goes to school, so that it will be more convenient for him to go to school in the future. Of course, I don't have a problem, but I suggested that it would be better to add my name to the house that my parents paid for, even if it was just a formality, indicating that the two of us bought it jointly.
I didn't expect this seemingly normal request, but my mother-in-law strongly objected. "Of course, this house should be registered in the name of the son, and it will be reserved for the son in the future, what do you do with your name?" My mother-in-law's words embarrassed me, my husband and I are the owners of this family, why can't the house be purchased jointly?
"Mom, now the law stipulates that the property of husband and wife is joint, and of course the names of two people must be written when buying a house, which is common sense." My husband helped me say a fair word.
"I'm against it!" The mother-in-law did not relent, "How could there be such a rule before, the house registered the child's name, why did you young people change the tradition for no reason?"
I saw that my mother-in-law was holding on to the old rules and refusing to give in, and she immediately became angry: "Mother-in-law, now the law is like this, it's useless if you don't agree, we will definitely follow the law!"
"Okay, okay, you mother and son talk, I have a headache, I don't want to listen to these things." My mother-in-law ignored me and went to the bedroom on her own.
I was annoyed by my mother-in-law's attitude, and I had a fire in my heart. My husband advised me not to be like an old man, but I just felt insulted.
Later, I discussed this issue with my husband, and he said that my parents are old and their ability to understand is indeed limited, and the full purchase price is their savings when they were young, and their ideas should be respected, and I suggested that I give in. I remembered that my mother-in-law had always cared about me, and I felt that there was no need to quarrel about this, so I reluctantly agreed to my husband's suggestion.
My mother-in-law is still as good to me as ever, but I still can't help but feel a breath of anger in my heart. In this way, we finally bought a house in the area where Xiao Ming went to kindergarten, and according to my mother-in-law's wishes, only the names of my husband and son were registered. I was unwilling, but there was nothing I could do.
"Changing houses? Isn't it okay to live in the house I bought now, and can I change it?" As soon as I proposed to change the house, my mother-in-law's face sank, "There are some messy ideas every day, a hammer in the east and a mallet in the west, and the money is wasted?"
I forced myself to endure my anger and explained: "Mother-in-law, the house I bought now is still far from the school, and it is very inconvenient to pick up and drop off my children to school every day in the future. Buying a school district house can save a lot of money, and housing prices have been rising, so it's the right time to buy. ”
"What's inconvenient, I'll pick up and drop off every day!" My mother-in-law didn't listen to my explanation at all.
"Mother-in-law, you are too old and physically inconvenient, so it is too hard for you to run around every day to pick up your grandson. It's really necessary to buy a school district house, and I've seen it, and we can get a house very close to the school for a little difference. "I still have the patience to reason with my mother-in-law.
"Can't work for your son and grandson when you're old? I'm in good health!" The mother-in-law's tone was completely different from the gentleness of the past, but she said loudly excitedly, "I just said it, I don't agree to change rooms!" You young people are doing evil now, spending money all day long, it's all unreasonable ideas!"
I was yelled at by my mother-in-law like this, all my patience reached the limit, and I couldn't hold back the anger in my heart anymore, so I immediately returned the favor: "Mother-in-law, it was your son and my husband's money to buy a house, what does it matter to you?" Why disagree? I think you just don't like me, and you always want to make things difficult for me!"
"You!" My mother-in-law was so angry that her face turned red when she was hit by me like this, "My son's money is my money!" I've got the final say!"
"Okay, mother-in-law, you have the final say, then let's divorce!" I couldn't bear it anymore and blurted out the word divorce.
"You!" The mother-in-law's eyes widened when she heard this, and she stammered and couldn't speak for a while.
Just when our mother and son were fighting with each other, my husband came home. Seeing this tense posture, he hurriedly came over to persuade him: "You two, what are you arguing about at noon!" Just discuss and solve the matter of buying a house, and make it like this!"
The mother-in-law wiped her tears and cried to her husband: "Son, your daughter-in-law, she said she wants to divorce you!"
I also explained to my husband: "It's because she doesn't agree to change houses, and she says some ugly things to make it difficult for me, I really can't bear it!"
My husband shook his head and sighed: "Really, you will quarrel like this when I go out for a while, it's too unusual." Mother-in-law, we will discuss the matter of the house slowly, and we don't have to change it. Wife, don't be impulsive, we are all a family, don't talk about divorce. ”
My mother-in-law and I are still puffed up, and no one pays attention to anyone. My mother-in-law was angry that I was actually threatening a divorce, and I was also annoyed by her attitude just now. After a night of cold war, the atmosphere was very awkward...
That night, my husband slept in my son's room, and I slept alone in the master bedroom, and my heart was very angry. My husband went to work early the next morning, and I began to actively read the information about the house change, and made up my mind to move to the school district.
As a result, my mother-in-law suddenly came to the house, and when she saw that I was looking at the house information, her brows were wrinkled into Sichuan characters: "I know that you young people have a tendon, and if I say no, I can't do it!"
I plucked up the courage to say to my mother-in-law, "Mother-in-law, I respect your opinion, but buying a house is our own business, and please don't interfere." I will definitely change to the school district room!"
When my mother-in-law heard me say this, she was so angry that her face was crooked: "Let me tell you, if you dare to change the house, I will go back the full amount of the purchase of this house!" Where will you get the money to buy another house?"
I was caught off guard by my mother-in-law's words, and I was speechless for a while. Indeed, the full payment for this house is paid by my mother-in-law, and I am not qualified to decide. But I really don't want to pick up and drop off my kids that far every day, it's not good for him.
Just when she was in a dilemma, her mother-in-law said again: "Ha, you figured it out, right?" Listen to me in the future, I'm right!"
I couldn't bear it anymore and yelled back at my mother-in-law: "You only care about yourself, you don't think about your children at all!" As a mother to my son, I have to plan for his future. If you are so vexatious, I can only choose to divorce my husband!"
"You!" My mother-in-law turned pale with the astonishing word "divorce", and she opened the door and left, slamming the door slammed shut.
I know that this time I may have gone too far, and that the divorce was purely a spur of the moment. It's understandable that my mother-in-law is angry with me, after all, the house is hers, and my attitude is really tough.
When my husband came back in the evening, he looked at the deserted scene at home and sighed: "Can't you two talk well?" I have to argue to the point of getting divorced and running away from home, it's so undeserved!"
I also felt scared, for fear that my mother-in-law would be really angry and cut off relations with us. So I hurriedly called my mother-in-law to apologize: "Mother-in-law, I'm sorry, I said it seriously, don't be really angry." I'll carefully consider changing rooms, and you and your husband can discuss it. ”
The mother-in-law was silent for a long time before she said, "Okay, I'll come back and have a good talk with you."
When I hung up the phone, I felt both scared and a little expectant, wondering how my mother-in-law would react.
More than an hour later, my mother-in-law came to our house. She sat down without saying a word, with a gloomy face. After a long while, she said, "I've figured it out, so let's change rooms."
My eyes widened in surprise, and I couldn't believe my ears. The mother-in-law then said, "I have transferred all the money to you directly for the purchase of this house, and you can make your own decisions about the house in the future."
"Mother-in-law, I..." I was a little speechless, feeling guilty and ashamed.
My mother-in-law waved her hand and interrupted me: "It's all said that you can just decide for yourself, I don't want to listen to the explanation anymore."
I could see that although my mother-in-law gave in on the surface, she was still very reluctant in her heart. I knew that this would not be easy for her, so I took the initiative to go over and hold her hand: "Mother-in-law, I'm sorry ' . I should be more respectful of your ideas and not just insist on them. ”
The mother-in-law was silent for a moment, sighed long, and her expression softened: "When I was young, I always felt that I had the final say, and others should listen to me. Now that I think about it, those stubborn opinions have also caused a lot of trouble to family and friends. ”
I gently patted my mother-in-law's hand and quietly listened to her continue: "You should be the mother of your husband and grandchildren, and care for them. I should not stand in your way, but support your decision. ”
"Mother-in-law, I understand your kindness and understanding, we should understand each other." I said with emotion.
The mother-in-law nodded, her eyes softened: "It's because I'm old, and the perspective of looking at things is still stuck in the past, so it's time to change." You're right, I should support you, not ."
After my mother-in-law and I understood each other, the stone in my heart finally landed. My mother-in-law finally agreed to change our house and also transferred us the money for the house. This is a good result for the harmony and happiness of our family.
In this way, with the consent of my mother-in-law, we quickly bought a new house very close to the primary school where Xiao Ming will go to school in the future. Although my mother-in-law disagreed at first, she finally fully understood my thoughts, which made me see her progress.
After moving to a new home, I warmly invited my mother-in-law to come and sit at our house often. At first, my mother-in-law was a little awkward, but after that, she gradually accepted it. One day she suddenly said, "The new house is so nicely furnished, the sun is shining in, and every part is warm." In the future, I won't live in the old house, and I will come here every day to live with you!"
I immediately readily agreed: "Of course it's good, mother-in-law!" We're even more lively with you. ”
My mother-in-law gradually brought her clothes and daily necessities to live with us, and we became a family of three. The mother-in-law has also become more and more cheerful, often making Xiao Ming laugh.
One day, Xiao Ming called his mother-in-law "grandma" for the first time, and her mother-in-law was so happy that she picked Xiao Ming up and spun around in circles, and we all laughed.
I thought to myself, maybe at first we had different ideas and differences, but through communication and the precipitation of time, the inherent barriers gradually dissolved, and were replaced by mutual understanding and acceptance. My mother-in-law stopped clinging to traditional ideas and became actively supportive of my ideas. I myself have learned to tolerate the traditional side of my mother-in-law, and to give in and no longer force absolutes.
Just like the description in "Comic Strip: Daughter of the Himalayas", "You have your Himalayas, I have my Changbai Mountain", we all grew up in our own Changbai Mountain, of course, there will be different boundaries, but as long as we have an inclusive learning mentality, communicate with each other, and one mountain is still high, we will eventually reach a consensus.
Now we have a lot of fun every day. Whenever I see my mother-in-law playing with Xiao Ming with relish, I will sigh that life does not need to be perfect, but it needs understanding, tolerance and understanding. It is this understanding that has dissolved the barriers we once had and made this home more happy.
In this way, with the understanding and communication with my mother-in-law, our family of three lived a very happy life. My mother-in-law takes care of Xiao Ming wholeheartedly, and I do my best to take care of my mother-in-law's daily life.
After Xiao Ming went to elementary school, my mother-in-law and I took turns going to school every day to pick him up. After class, Xiao Ming was always the first to rush out of the classroom, happily running to us, chattering about all kinds of things that happened at school.
"Grandma, the teacher praised me for my good writing in Chinese class today!" One day after school, Xiao Ming said happily.
"Really? Grandma's smartest baby, writing essays will definitely be even better in the future!" The mother-in-law laughed and teased him.
"Yes, yes, I must be a great writer when I grow up!" Xiao Ming said, excitedly jumping around us in circles.
Looking at Xiao Ming's happy appearance, my mother-in-law and I looked at each other and smiled. Happiness is as simple as that, family reunion, health and safety.
On weekends, our family often goes out on outings. Between the green mountains and green waters, we breathe fresh air, and generations of people are full of laughter. At this time, my mother-in-law was always in good spirits, and she didn't feel tired of going out at all.
"Sitting on the roots of the old life has grown grass, it is right to come out and go around, otherwise how can I do it!" Mother-in-law said.
I nodded, took out the prepared fruit and entertained her: "Mother-in-law is right, how good it is for our family to go out and walk around more, enhance our relationship and see the outside world."
In life, it is rare to be able to sit in nature with your loved ones and enjoy the joy of family. Who remembers that we had a quarrel with each other? The harmony of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law requires both parties to manage with their hearts, which is a life principle that I deeply experience.
Nowadays, whenever my neighbors and friends praise our family for their happiness, I silently think that it all stems from the positive communication and understanding between me and my mother-in-law. There may be differences in philosophy, but as long as there is kindness and tolerance, and mutual understanding, the family will eventually get closer and closer.
I constantly remind myself to cherish the happiness in front of me, because it is not easy to come by. The original misunderstanding has been surpassed by us, and if there was no such contradiction, there would not have been a subsequent consensus. Life is driven by a little bit of understanding, which will be a valuable asset for our family from generation to generation.