I still remember the first day of transferring to a new school in my first year of high school, sitting in the class looking at strange classmates, a little nervous and uneasy.
During the self-study class, the Chinese teacher introduced a transfer student, he was very tall, at least 1.85 meters, and he was tall.
Li Ming's appearance left a deep impression on me, a pair of apricot eyes are very spirited, and the high bridge of his nose is very straight.
I couldn't help but look at him a few more times during class. I found that Li Ming was always alone, and he looked lonely when he listened carefully.
During recess, I saw Li Ming standing alone on the edge of the playground, looking at the sky in the distance. There seemed to be a touch of loneliness and loneliness in his eyes, and the corners of his mouth unconsciously skimmed down.
I can't help but think that it must be very lonely to come to a new environment without any familiar people.
At noon the next day, I had lunch alone in the woods behind the school building. Suddenly, a person sat down on the bench under the tree, it was Li Ming.
I hesitated, but decided to step forward and say hello to him.
"Hello, I'm your classmate, my name is Lin Mei. Isn't it lonely to be alone when eating? I asked tentatively.
Li Ming raised his head, looked at me with clear eyes, and then smiled politely: "Thank you for your concern, I am used to it alone, and I will not be lonely."
"I know you're new and unfamiliar to school, so if you need to, you can talk to me and I'll try to help."
"Thank you so much." Li Ming narrowed his eyes and smiled, the sunlight shone on his face, and his handsome face revealed kindness and gentleness.
After that, I would often go to the bench in the woods to chat with Li Ming. Although he didn't take the initiative to speak, I found that as long as I found the right topic, he would listen to me carefully and offer some opinions from time to time.
Li Ming has a gentle personality and is very cultivated, and I feel very close to him when I chat with him. I would talk to him about my troubles or difficulties, and Li Ming would listen carefully and give me advice.
One day after school, I ran to Li Ming excitedly and said, "I took the first place in my grade, and I am so happy!" ”
"Congratulations, you must have put in a lot of effort for such an excellent result." Li Ming sincerely congratulated me.
"Yes, I have been preparing for this test for a long time, and I finally achieved my wish!" I said happily, "It's all thanks to the study advice you give me, thank you very much!" ”
"Don't thank me, it's all your own efforts." Li Ming said with a smile.
I found Li Ming to be a very modest person. He never exaggerates his credit, nor is he proud of it.
In him, I felt a warmth and reassurance. I know that no matter what difficulties I encounter, he will help and support me at the first time.
In this way, Li Ming and I became good friends. We would study together, eat together, and come home from school together.
I feel like I've found a close friend to talk to him about my worries and pleasures, and he listens carefully.
The four years of college passed quickly, and Li Ming and I were successfully admitted to the same school and different majors.
Li Ming plays basketball well and often gets the highest score in the game. Whenever there is a game, I go and cheer for him. Watching him go into the game, with a firm look in his eyes and clean movements, I am proud and happy for him.
Once after Li Ming's big victory, I excitedly ran to the sidelines and handed him prepared sports drinks and towels.
"Congratulations on your victory!" I said with a smile.
"Thank you for coming and cheering me on." Li Ming took the drink and towel, sweat shining on his face.
I also joined a dance club with a lot of personality, and my first performance on stage made my hands sweat.
As a result, the music came together, and I went into the groove and threw myself into the dance. After the end, I was refreshed and full of joy.
As soon as I looked up, I saw Li Ming standing in the audience, waving to me, with pride in his eyes. I happily gave him a thumbs up.
Four years of college, we were in touch on and off. After getting acquainted, Li Ming will give gifts on my birthday and will also care about my study life.
Approaching graduation, we made an appointment to go out to dinner and sit by the river to watch the night view.
"The four years of college went by so quickly, it felt like it had passed in the blink of an eye." I sighed.
"Yes, time flies." Li Ming also echoed.
"Do you have any plans for the future?" I asked him.
"Actually. I want to tell you something. Li Ming looked at me with a serious expression, "I've liked you since high school.
Graduation is imminent, and I would like to formally confess to you and ask you to consider staying with me.
I looked at him in amazement, my heart beating unbelievably. It turns out that he has silently liked me for so many years!
"Would you like to stay with me?" Li Ming looked at me intently, waiting for my reply.
I took a deep breath, then smiled and nodded: "I like you too, Li Ming." I'm glad you confessed to me.
Li Ming's eyes lit up, and he stepped forward to hold my hand: "Then let's officially be together." I will be good to you and make you happy.
I also held his hand tightly, my heart surging, and I was so happy that I was about to fly.
On the day of the graduation ceremony, Li Ming appeared holding my hand and startled everyone. I blushed, but couldn't help the corners of my mouth rise.
After graduating from college, Li Ming found a good job. We started living together and lived a life without shame.
One night, Li Ming suddenly knelt on one knee, then took out a small box from his pocket and said to me: "I want to marry you, start a family with you, and spend every day of my life together."
I burst into tears with emotion and happily agreed to his marriage proposal.
On the wedding day, I was wearing a dressed white wedding dress, Li Ming suit and leather shoes, and my eyes were full of happy smiles.
"Would you like to?" The pastor asked us.
"I do." Li Ming and I spoke in unison.
A new chapter in my life began, and Li Ming and I entered the palace of marriage.
Life after marriage is dull but happy. Li Ming's job is stable, and I also found a good job in a foreign company.
One day, the company told me that I needed to travel to the newly established branch for a month to help them complete the business takeover.
Although I don't want to leave Li Ming for so long, my work still needs to be prioritized. The night before the business trip, Li Ming hugged me and said, "A month will pass quickly, remember to contact me often."
I nodded and wrapped my arms around his waist, feeling reluctant to say goodbye.
On the first day I reported to the branch, I saw a familiar person - Wang Wei, my crush in college.
He still remembered me and came up and hugged me excitedly: "Long time no see, you look more beautiful!" ”
I smiled a little uncomfortably and greeted him politely.
It turns out that Wang Wei also works in this branch and will be responsible for business takeover with me.
During this month, Wang Wei took good care of me, would wake me up and take me back to my residence after work.
Sometimes working overtime until late, Wang Wei would bring a late-night snack to the office. I watched his thoughtful gestures, and nostalgia welled up in my heart.
One day, the project team organized an outing. Wang Wei called early in the morning and told me to wear light clothes, sun protection and hydration.
"Be careful on the road, talk to me when you arrive." Wang Wei gently instructed.
I was speechless for a moment, blushing and at a loss.
Wang Wei held my hand and looked at me intently: "This time, I won't let you go again." ”
For a moment, I remembered our beautiful campus days. Wang Wei's crush on me, my tsundere response.
These memories flooded into my mind, and my heart was numb.
"I know it's sudden. You're married now, but I can't help myself from approaching you. This month, I am very happy to take care of you again.
My tears rolled in my eyes, and I didn't know how to respond.
Wang Wei hugged me into his arms, and I couldn't help but hug him back. After a long time, he whispered in my ear, "Stay with me."
I suddenly came to my senses and hurriedly pushed him away: "I'm sorry, I'm already married..." ”
After that, I turned and ran, tears blurring my vision. A sense of guilt of betrayal arose, and I did not dare to face Li Ming.
After returning from a business trip, I didn't dare to face Li Ming squarely, feeling guilty.
But a few days later, Li Ming still noticed my abnormality.
"What's wrong with you? Is there something wrong with your work? Li Ming asked me with concern.
I can't make up a reason. Li Ming looked at me with a frown, and I didn't look away, avoiding his eyes.
"What's wrong, you tell me the truth." Li Ming's tone became serious.
Holding back my tears, I decided to tell him the truth: "I'm sorry. It was I who met my college classmates on a business trip, and we. Something happened to us that shouldn't have happened.
Hearing this, Li Ming's face instantly turned pale, and he asked me in a trembling voice: "What happened?" You make it clear to me! ”
I choked up, intermittently telling the ins and outs of what was going on.
After hearing this, Li Ming's eyes were first incredulous, and soon turned into anger.
"So, you're just dating other men behind my back, even kissing and hugging? Our marriage is a joke in your eyes? Li Ming asked me bitterly.
"I'm sorry, it's all my fault!" I covered my face and cried, "I shouldn't cheat on me, I know this makes you very sad, you can hit me and scold me, don't leave me!" ”
"Enough! Our marriage can't go on, I'm going to get a divorce! Li Ming threw away my hand and slammed the door without looking back.
I sat on the ground crying, and the sharp regret in my heart was about to pierce me.
In the days that followed, Li Ming directly ignored my existence. I begged him to give me a chance to make amends, and he was so cold that he was like a stranger.
Later, under the persuasion of a friend, Li Ming reluctantly agreed not to divorce first, but put forward many requirements to supervise me.
My phone was checked, chat records had to be submitted for inspection, and all social accounts were asked to disclose passwords.
Li Ming would suddenly check my credit card bill and ask me about each expense. I have to report my itinerary to him every day.
I felt suffocated and humiliated, but I was to blame and had to endure it. I want to do everything I can to please Li Ming, hoping to slowly win back his trust.
However, no matter how humble I was, Li Ming was still indifferent.
Once, I said to Li Ming, "Look at your daughter, she is still so young and needs her father's love." ”
"I will fulfill my responsibilities as a father, but that doesn't mean I'll forgive you." Li Ming's tone was cold.
I felt hopeless and helpless, our marriage in jeopardy.
Three years have passed, Li Ming is still indifferent to me, and the gap between us is getting deeper and deeper.
One day, I said to Li Ming with difficulty: "Please give me another chance and let us start over, okay?" ”
"Heavy? In your heart, I am a stepping stone for you to trample on! Li Ming sneered, "My heart is dead, do you understand? ”
I burst into tears and begged him to forgive me: "I really know the mistake, I love you so much, I really beg you to give me a chance to make amends."
"Love me? You know what love is! Li Ming roared madly, "If you love me, you won't make out with other men behind my back!" You don't deserve to talk about love! ”
I cried breathlessly, and the resentment that Li Ming had accumulated over the past three years finally broke out, and I didn't know what to do.
At this time, I received the divorce agreement from lawyer Li Ming. I was shocked and called him to ask what he meant.
"It means I've really had enough and don't want to continue this marriage." Li Ming said calmly.
"How can you be like this, we have a daughter!" I cried.
"It says that my daughter will be raised by me. Don't spoil her. Li Ming's tone was full of contempt.
I begged him not to do this to me, and Li Ming hung up the phone.
But when he threw the agreement in front of me with a cold face, I knew it was all over.
"This is the consequence of your betrayal of me, we are both clear, you don't appear in front of me and the child in the future." Li Ming left the courthouse without looking back.
I sat on my knees, tears blurring my vision. I know that I owe Li Ming too much, and I deserve his hatred.
But Li Ming said indifferently: "My decision will not change, don't come to me in the future." ”
I begged him to think twice, and Li Ming directly asked his assistant to take me out the door.
I wept bitterly at the door of the courthouse and knelt on the ground begging Li Ming's forgiveness.
The pedestrian looked sideways, and Li Ming's figure leaving in a hurry did not linger.
I knew our marriage was ruined by my infidelity. My damn sin ruined a family and I could never forgive myself.
After the divorce, I sat at home all day in a daze.
I sent a message to Li Ming to try to get back together, and he directly blocked me. I knew it was irreparable.
I began to reflect on myself. I understood that Li Ming and I were like broken mirrors that could never be reunited.
I think of our bits and pieces: meeting in high school, falling in love in college, and finally getting married. Li Ming was kind and considerate to me, and I failed them all.
Every time I think about it, I feel sorry. I am ashamed of Li Ming's care over the years and failed to protect our marriage.
How I wish I could go back in time to the days when we first fell in love. I swore that I would cherish Li Ming instead of cheating and breaking his heart.
But I know that time can't do anything, and I've lost Li Ming.
It's all my fault, and I don't deserve forgiveness. But I will use time to atone for my sins.
I want to start again and become a better version of myself. I am determined not to repeat the same mistakes and never hurt anyone who loves me again.
I will cherish the people in front of me, not think about the east. I want to live in the present, not just remember the past.
No matter what setbacks I encounter in the future, I will not choose to escape and cheat. I have to face the problem and think about the solution with my lover.
Although Li Ming and I have broken contact, I will wish him a future life in my heart. I also wish our daughter a healthy and happy upbringing.
I believe that as long as I work hard, I will one day meet the true love of my life. Until then I will hold it firmly and not let history repeat itself.
This marriage taught me a cruel lesson. But I want to keep hope and believe that my future self will definitely become a better person.