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Yesterday, I finally plucked up the courage to take my second treasure back to my parents' house.
"Mom, we're home." I took Erbao's little hand, stood at the door of his former residence, and shouted inside.
"Come on, come on, my little girl is back!" Mom ran out in surprise and hugged me and Erbao tightly, with a long-lost smile on her face.
"Mom, I miss you so much." I hugged her excitedly.
"Come in and talk, it's cold outside." Mom smiled and led us inside.
"Erbao, it's grandma, go and say hello to grandma." I touched Erbao and asked him to shout "Hello grandma!" ”
"Good boy, grandma misses you too." Mom smiled and touched Erbao's head, then turned to me and said, "He is like you when you were a child, lively and cute." ”
"Yes, Mom, you're older and your hair is much whiter." I sighed and took my mother's hand.
"No one can escape the passage of time, but now that you are home, your mother is so happy that she can't care about anything!" Mom squinted and said happily.
Hearing my mother's words, my heart was mixed. Over the years, I married my husband's family and had children. I was committed to playing the role of a "good wife", but at the same time I gradually distanced myself from my family. Now that I have finally found that long-lost maternal love, I can't help but blush.
"Mom, I'm sorry, I haven't come back to see you often over the years." I apologized to my mom a little nervously.
"Silly girl, why aren't you happy? Mom knows it's not easy for you. Mom comforted: "You are a wonderful daughter and a competent wife and mother. Mom is proud of you. ”
"Mom, thank you." I hugged my mom, and I couldn't hold back the tears anymore.
My mother, like when I was a child, gently patted me on the back and put me to sleep. I leaned into her arms as if I had returned to my childhood. There are no grievances and pains that cannot be solved by maternal love.
After a while, I calmed down, sat face to face with my mother, and began to talk about my experiences along the way.
"Mom, I think I can't stand it anymore, it's really hard for me to adapt to my husband's house, and my in-laws are so restrained that I can't breathe." When I mention my in-laws' house, I can't help but sigh with emotion.
"The road to wrongful family is narrow, and it is inevitable that people will have a temper when they are old, but we must learn to be tolerant and do not forcibly confront some traditional concepts." The mother advised.
"I understand, but some things need to change. For example, I really can't stand it. For example, the child takes the father's surname. Speaking of this, my tone became firm.
Mom listened quietly, without immediately agreeing or disagreeing. She just asked softly, "Why?" Have you thought about the consequences? ”
"It is a feudal tradition for children to take their father's surname, and I can't let Erbao lose his independent personality and surname." I said seriously.
Mom nodded, "What you said makes sense, as a mother, you also have this right." But have you ever thought about your in-laws' reaction? ”
"They will definitely protest strongly, but I have made up my mind." I clenched my fists: "Mom, sober me up this time." ”
Mom looked at my determined eyes and finally smiled, "Well, Mom supports you, as long as you think clearly and be brave." ”
"Mom, thank you!" With my mother's support and encouragement, I burst into tears.
In the next few days, I will talk to my mother about these years of mental journey and find my strength. I believe that in the future, I will have the courage to face the opposition of my in-laws and fight for the right to change my surname as I believe. Because this is not only about my dignity, but also about whether women will be treated equally in marriage in the future.
I know there is still a long way to go, but with my mom's company and support, I firmly believe that everything will be fine.
Just like my mother said, I talk to her a lot these days and say a lot of things that were difficult to talk about before.
Mom was not only a good listener but also gave me a lot of advice. She asked me to reflect on whether I had done anything wrong in my marriage, such as whether I was too strong in my words, and learned to give in. I thought about it, reflected on it, and found that I sometimes spoke very harshly. , which angered my husband.
"Mom, you're right, I have to change." I said with emotion.
"The key is to find a balance." Mom said softly. "The decision to change surname shouldn't be compromised, but there are other little things you can get your husband to do. Husband and wife should understand and tolerate each other. ”
I nodded, determined to change my mind about how I would get along with my husband in the future, but I still stood my ground on the issue of my child's last name.
At the same time, Erbao is also happy at home with his parents. He pestered his grandmother every day to talk, play games, and didn't bother to write in class. My mother has also poured all her thoughts into Erbao over the years and loved him to the bone.
Sometimes I feel sorry for Daibao who is far away from my in-laws. A person may feel lonely. But as soon as I thought of the purpose of returning, I plucked up the courage to stay home with my parents.
On the fourth day, I finally made up my mind and said this to my mother: "Mom, I have decided to change back to Erbao." ”
Mom hesitated and nodded: "Well, you are all my good children, no matter what your surname is, I wish you all the best." ”
"Thank you mom for your understanding." I hugged her tightly again.
"So what are you going to say to your in-laws?" Mom asked worriedly.
"I'll stay here for the last day and go back tomorrow to talk to them." I say. "It's okay, some things can't be dragged on, it's better to solve them as soon as possible, remember, control your emotions, don't quarrel." The mother warned.
"I know my mother, and I will face it calmly." I nodded firmly.
I called my husband that night and told him I would be back the day after tomorrow. The other end of the phone was silent for a long time. My husband just said a faint "yes" and hung up.
I was vaguely uneasy. This reaction seemed to indicate that he already knew what I was thinking and disagreed.
But I wasn't too worried about my husband's reaction. I believe that as long as we communicate sincerely, we will definitely make him understand my thoughts.
The next day, my mother sent me and Erbao to the door early.
"Be careful on the road, call at any time if you have a situation." The mother's eyes were full of reluctance.
"Okay mom, I often call you to visit you, and I have a lot of fun coming back this time, and I feel that I am much stronger." I gave my mom a big hug.
"Mom will always support you, believe in yourself, you can do it!" Mom also hugged me and said excitedly.
I walked home with Erbao. The upcoming interview made me a little nervous, but I told myself that as long as I didn't waver, I would get through it.
For the child's surname, for the dignity of the mother, I will fight to the end!
Along the way, I drove from time to time to look at Erbao in the rearview mirror. He played with the car nervously, as if he didn't know what was going on.
A feeling of contentment and love welled up in my heart. The change of the little life's surname was to defend her rights as a mother and give her an innate independent personality.
Thinking of this, I became even more determined to go home and argue with my in-laws.
When I arrived at my husband's door, I took a deep breath, held Erbao in my hand, and walked in. As soon as we opened the door, my in-laws were already sitting on the sofa in the living room, waiting for us with ugly faces.
"You're back? Have fun? The in-laws asked coldly.
"Good thing I made you worry." I replied politely.
"It's good to worry." The mother-in-law said. "You ran back to your parents' house to stay temporarily, and you didn't take Dabao with you. It would not be safe for my grandson to be home alone, have you ever thought about this? ”
Before I could answer, my father-in-law interrupted: "Dabao asks my parents every day when they will come back, and I don't know how to answer, you make Dabao very unhappy!" ”
"Sorry, I really can't figure it out this time." I bowed my head to apologize and told myself to calm down.
"Okay, he's back, Dabao, call your brother to come to the house for a reunion." The mother-in-law said to her husband.
My husband silently went upstairs to ask Dabao to come down. On the surface, the family was eating a steaming lunch, but I felt that the atmosphere was so dignified that it was simply materialized.
After lunch, the children went upstairs to play. I know the time has come, and I have to make it clear.
"Father-in-law, I went back to my parents' house this time and also learned some things." I plucked up the courage to speak. "Huh? What's wrong? The mother-in-law asked displeased.
"I decided to change my maiden name back to Erbao." I said softly but firmly.
"What do you say!" The in-laws stood up almost at the same time, with incredulous expressions on their faces.
"Why are you doing this? Do you want to off your in-laws? The mother-in-law was furious.
"We do not recognize this decision! If Erbao takes your surname, how can he gain a foothold in our family!" The father-in-law also shouted a warning.
I tried to control my emotions, "Please listen to me, it's not fair that children only take their father's last name. As a mother, I also have this right. ”
"I'm not right!" My mother-in-law interrupted me: "Think about who you hurt by doing this!" ”
"Calm down, let's talk about this." The husband advised from the side: "It is a tradition for children to take their father's surname, and they cannot be changed without permission. ”
"Yes, if you continue to make trouble, you will only harm the child!" The father-in-law said solemnly.
I took a deep breath and continued to explain my reasons, but my in-laws kept denying it and wouldn't let me speak.
The quarrels became more and more intense, I began to lose control of my emotions and began to argue with my in-laws .
At this time, the husband, who was watching from the sidelines, finally stood up and said resolutely: "Shut up! Dabao will take my surname, Erbao will take my mother's surname, and that's it. ”
The in-laws were stunned and looked at the man unwillingly.
"I understand my wife's point of view. The tradition of children taking their father's surname should change. Don't stick to the rules. The man said seriously.
Hearing this, I burst into tears with excitement - it turned out that my husband chose to stand by my side for the first time!
"What a diehard! This is treason! The mother-in-law screamed.
"My decision will not change." The husband said firmly.
Seeing that her husband was resolute, the in-laws could only angrily go back to the room to protest.
I comforted my husband and said that I would slowly consult with my in-laws to strive for their understanding and acceptance.
My husband nodded and patted me on the shoulder: "I will support your decision, but you must also learn to consider them." ”
I looked at my husband with tears in my eyes, and I had a long-lost feeling in my heart that we could finally face the bittersweets and bitters of life together as partners.
At this moment, I am extremely glad that I chose to return to my parents' house for a short stay, which allowed me to find the strength and courage to become a mother again. I am confident that we will go hand in hand in the future.
In the days that followed that argument, I felt conflicted.
On the one hand, I am happy for my husband's support at this critical time; On the other hand, my parents-in-law's disappointment and opposition to me also filled me with self-blame.
"They gave birth to me and raised me for so many years, but I made them so sad, I was a crime." I couldn't help but confide in my husband my inner remorse.
"I understand your difficulties, but it takes courage and dedication to change traditions and break new ground." My husband comforted me.
I nodded, understanding that it would take time for things to escalate. Before going through the procedures for Erbao to change his surname, I decided to go back to my parents' house and hide for a few days.
After hearing the progress of the case, my mother silently held my hand: "Mom, I know that it is not easy for you, you must believe that God is fair to every child and has his own arrangements." ”
I leaned into my mother's arms, tears rolling in my eyes again. Fortunately, God allowed me to return to my mother again, otherwise I would not have known how to get through this difficult time.
A few days later, I picked myself up again. I called my husband's house and said I wanted to go back and see the kids.
My husband quickly agreed, but reminded my in-laws that it would take time to settle the feelings. I mustered up enough courage and plucked up the courage to go home.
It makes me very happy to see the children. Dabao ran over and hugged me, coquettishly saying that he missed me. Erbao also affectionately calls "mother". At this moment, I just want to follow them well, and all other concerns are set aside.
However, my in-laws were still cold to me. During the meal, the two looked gloomy and basically remained silent. I don't force myself, just patiently take care of the children's daily life.
After a few days like this, the attitude of the in-laws finally eased. One day, when I was eating breakfast, my mother-in-law suddenly said: "The children seem to have grown taller in the past two days, it must be because of vegetarianism." ”
I looked at my mother-in-law in surprise and immediately replied: "Yes, Mom, I recently made vegetable soup to fill my stomach." ”
"Well, that's good." The mother-in-law lowered her head to eat again.
This brief conversation was like an ice release, and I felt that a small hole had been opened in my in-laws' defenses. Communicate sincerely, the relationship can still be repaired!
After that, I focused on taking care of my family. I help the fair take care of the garden and care for my mother-in-law: take the children to the park to play and strengthen their relationship. Through daily efforts, my in-laws' attitude towards me finally warmed up, and our relationship gradually warmed up.
Just when I thought the turmoil had subsided, the procedures for changing my surname had been completed. The moment I signed my name, my heart was mixed.
"You will be my good son from now on." When I picked up Erbao, I couldn't help but mutter.
I know this could spark another debate. But after going through ups and downs, I became more open and willing to continue to face the doubts and even objections of my in-laws.
Because I broke through myself and defended my rights as a mother. At this moment, I am proud and satisfied - my decision to change Kong's surname was the right one.
In the future, it will take time for the in-laws to understand. And I will continue to patiently communicate and repair the relationship. Family affection is my belief, and I will not give up for any reason.
I believe that as long as everyone opens their hearts and takes small steps of understanding, the stage of harmonious family coexistence will surely come.
Sure enough, as soon as the news of Erbao's change of surname spread, his in-laws became furious again.
"Fortunately, we thought you were getting better, but it turned out that you were doing good things behind your back!" The mother-in-law said angrily.
"Stop blaming her, she's already decided." The man continued to persuade his in-laws.
"Dabao has your surname, Erbao has her surname, we are all the laughing stock of outsiders!" My father-in-law was also angry.
I took a deep breath and tried to explain my thoughts again, but as soon as I spoke, my in-laws scolded me angrily: "Stop making excuses!" We can hear calluses in our ears! ”
My complaints suddenly flooded my eyes, and tears blurred my vision. Seeing this, my husband quickly came over and hugged me and apologized to my in-laws: "She has no choice but to do this, you have to put yourself in her shoes." ”
"Che, the people she hurt are us!" The mother-in-law turned away, still unable to forgive her.
In the days that followed, my in-laws laughed at me and even said that I was unfaithful to my children. I endured it, just wanted to get through this difficult time as soon as possible.
Once my in-laws went too far and I couldn't help but talk back. This actually gave my in-laws more excuses to attack me, and the relationship was at an impasse for a while.
That day, I was exhausted and called my mother to complain. After hearing this, my mother was silent for a long time before she slowly said: "Mom, I know you are very uncomfortable, but you also have to put yourself in the shoes of your in-laws." ”
I listened and remained silent - I fought for my rights, ignoring the hurt my in-laws were hurt by this decision.
"You're right, Mom. I have to learn to put myself in their shoes. "I finally spoke.
"It's okay, take your time, time can solve everything, I believe you can get through it." My mom encouraged me.
I hung up, determined to fix the relationship. After that, I began to put myself in my in-laws' shoes and look for opportunities to communicate calmly with them. I repeated my thoughts over and over again until my in-laws finally opened up.
"We're older, and it's really hard to accept new things because we haven't respected you to a certain extent." One day, my father-in-law suddenly said this, and his eyes were full of apologies.
"Dad, I understand you, as long as we understand each other, everything will be fine." I answered excitedly.
The mother-in-law also nodded, and her stubbornness finally softened.
Over time, the in-laws also gradually accepted this reality. Even if I don't completely agree, at least they don't oppose me anymore.
One day, my parents-in-law offered to take their two grandchildren out to play. I was ecstatic – it marked that we were finally out of the woods and the family was reunited!
Not everything in life goes according to plan, but relationships can be rebuilt as long as misunderstandings are resolved with love. This experience has made me grow a lot.
I will pass on this valuable experience to my two children: don't be afraid to make mistakes and fail, just keep a humble and kind heart, and eventually everything will fall into place.
This is the best lesson in life.
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