When it comes to the holidays, you feel more lonely? Loneliness is also a public health problem

A 2017 survey found that 31 percent of adults said they felt lonely during the past holiday season.

When it comes to a big holiday, feel more sad and lonely?

It's okay, you're not alone.

Feeling lonely on holidays that should be full of joy | porucz

Whether it's in the long-awaited reunion of family and friends, in a scenic area full of tourists, or alone in a rental house... Recently, there may be people who suddenly feel very lonely. This sense of loneliness, which is significantly increased during the holidays, is called holiday loneliness or holiday blues.

It is worth mentioning that this is not the same as clinical depression. Holiday loneliness is usually temporary and can be triggered in a number of ways during or after the holiday. A 2017 survey found that 31 percent of adults said they felt lonely during the past holiday season. In addition, 41% of respondents to the survey were concerned that family or friends would feel lonely during the holiday season.

Manifestations and causes

The most common symptom of holiday loneliness is feelings of loneliness and sadness that begin to persist or recur during the holiday season, and the intensity and duration of this feeling may vary.

In addition, people may also feel more tired than usual, depressed or irritable, have difficulty concentrating, suddenly lack interest in doing what they liked before, feel nervous and anxious, have a sense of loss...

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There are many reasons for these feelings. Factors such as high expectations, changing seasons and even sentimental memories can be catalysts for holiday loneliness.

In the media, the festival gets a lot of discussion and is often portrayed as a time of "celebration and goodness". Watching everyone else enjoying the holidays can easily make some people think that they are alone, especially for those who are far from home or distant from their families.

In addition, social media content can make people think that everyone else is having fun and enjoying loving family relationships — even if you don't know how everyone else spends the holidays. Not to mention that people tend to share more about their good times than sad things, especially on social media.

Everyone else's holiday looks happy | Image from the web

Holiday loneliness also appears to be associated with seasonal affective disorder (SAD). After autumn, the weather becomes significantly cooler and sunshine decreases, which may cause changes in people's mood. For some, the arrival of autumn is often accompanied by fatigue, loneliness, and even hopelessness. A mental health charity in the UK also said it would receive more calls for helplines in September.

September is still the beginning of school season, and returning to school can also be anxious, even if you have been away from school for many years, the impact may still be ... TJENA

Even for holiday lovers, such a period of high emotions and high expectations can make people feel more stressed and exhausted.

In addition, some of the possible causes of holiday loneliness are: lack of sleep due to busy holiday schedules, overeating and excessive drinking make the symptoms of holiday loneliness more obvious, traveling or gifting causing additional financial stress on yourself...

How to deal with it?

Loneliness is a very personal concept. Some people don't need a lot of social interaction to stay healthy and happy, while others may be in constant contact with family and friends and still feel very lonely. Therefore, in the face of holiday loneliness, the response measures are also different from person to person.

1. There is more than one way to celebrate the holidays

Media such as social media, TV shows and movies constantly show us the "ideal" holiday scene. But there's not just one way to experience your vacation. We can even try to create our own holiday traditions, such as watching one of our favorite movies at home or giving ourselves a lesson gift to learn a new skill. If someone else's happy vacation on social media bothers you, cut back on social media or disconnect for a while.

2. Keep your well-being in mind

Jeremy Nobel is a lecturer at the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health, saying people should not only acknowledge their loneliness, but also seize opportunities to build relationships with themselves.

And the most direct way to build a relationship with yourself is to take care of yourself. Maintaining a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising in moderation are all effective measures to ward off loneliness. If you're going through a difficult time, you can think of the holidays as a time when you have to take care of yourself and heal yourself.

The holidays also often mean that more people will demand your time and resources, and holiday party invitations can turn into stressful social obligations. It can also exacerbate some people's financial problems. So know your limits and learn how to say "no" and avoid over-provoking.

3. Try to "rebuild"

When negative thoughts arise, Kory Floyd, a psychology professor at the University of Arizona, recommends practicing "reconstructing," such as asking yourself what exactly the negative thoughts are in your head right now, how you should change them, or reminding yourself to focus on the people who were there when you think about people who didn't show up at a family gathering.

Expressing gratitude has a similar effect because it helps us focus on what we have. Plus, letting people know how important they are to you is also good for building meaningful social connections.

4. Remember that loneliness is temporary

Remind yourself that the loneliness of the present is only temporary, and that this feeling will soon end. For many office workers, holiday loneliness quickly dissipates after returning to their busy daily lives after the holidays. But people who already have mental health problems should be more careful during the holidays. Survey data shows that 64% of people with mental illness say that holidays make their condition worse.

Although holiday loneliness is usually temporary, we should be wary of these depressed emotions turning into clinical depression. Therefore, professional help should be sought in a timely manner if necessary.

Lonely "coming out"

Loneliness is a normal human emotion, and we all feel lonely at some point.

Much of the existing discussion has focused on loneliness in older groups, but the reality is that people of all ages face this problem, and child loneliness is often overlooked. The study found that up to 80 percent of minors said they sometimes felt lonely, while children who were dissatisfied with their relationships with family and friends were more likely to feel lonely. In order to cope with loneliness, we must first learn to recognize it. Talking about this feeling helps children learn to recognize this feeling and lets children know that they are not alone.

Loneliness is experienced by people of all ages, and loneliness is also a public health problem | freestocks-photos

"Allow ourselves to feel longing, loss, and even loneliness instead of being embarrassed or ashamed of the feelings we experience." Michelle Munson, a psychologist who studies the mental health of adolescents and young adults, said.

Because the label of "loneliness" is often accompanied by shame, some psychologists have proposed the term "lonely coming out", arguing that we should "take holiday loneliness out of the cabinet". This is one way to normalize loneliness.

Like most emotions, loneliness is a signal that we need some connection at the moment, whether it's connecting to the outside or exploring ourselves inwardly to connect with ourselves.

Holidays can also be a time to take care of yourself and heal yourself

| Loof and Timmy

Written by | Cloud

Review | Ziv

Resources:

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[3] Pearson, C. (2022). How to Manage Holiday Loneliness. N.Y. Times. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2022/12/20/well/family/holiday-loneliness.html

[4] Next Avenue. (2022, December 02). Retrieved from https://www.nextavenue.org/how-to-be-less-lonely-this-holiday-season

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[6] How to Cope With the Holiday Blues. (2023, September 25). Retrieved from https://www.verywellmind.com/holiday-blues-4771716

[7] 8 Tips for Navigating the Holidays on Your Own. (2016, May 17). Retrieved from https://psychcentral.com/health/spending-holidays-alone-coping-tips

[8] Holiday Blues - IMH | Institute of Mental Health. (2023, September 25). Retrieved from https://www.imh.com.sg/Mental-Health-Resources/Conditions-and-Challenges/Pages/Holiday-Blues.aspx

[9] Deaton, E. (2023, September 25). Holiday Loneliness: Why The “Best” Time Of The Year Is Often Lonely Holiday Loneliness: Why The “Best” Time Of Year Is Often Lonely. Retrieved from https://www.rootsofloneliness.com/holiday-loneliness

[10] AARP Foundation Survey Finds Positive Feelings Associated With Holidays but Also Concern for Family Members Who May Feel Lonely. (2023, September 26). Retrieved from https://press.aarp.org/2017-12-13-AARP-Foundation-Survey-Finds-Positive-Feelings-Associated-Holidays-Concern-Family-Members-Who-May-Feel-Lonely

[11] Thorne, L. (2022). How to look after your mental health over the Christmas and New Year holidays. ABC News. Retrieved from https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-12-21/christmas-holiday-depression-anxiety-loneliness-help-support/101745320

[12] Hawkley, L. C., & Cacioppo, J. T. (2010). Loneliness Matters: A Theoretical and Empirical Review of Consequences and Mechanisms. Annals of behavioral medicine : a publication of the Society of Behavioral Medicine, 40(2). doi: 10.1007/s12160-010-9210-8

[13] Tackling loneliness: why our children might feel out of touch this summer. Retrieved from https://www.talkeducation.com/news/tackling-loneliness-why-our-children-might-feel-out-of-touch-this-summer

[14] Or Silvia Manclossi, D. S. (2018). Children’s and young people’s experiences of loneliness - Office for National Statistics. Office for National Statistics. Retrieved from https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/wellbeing/articles/childrensandyoungpeoplesexperiencesofloneliness/2018