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Author: Orange is Orange Source: Reading 369 (ID: dushu369com)
I hope that parents all over the world can enjoy their old age in peace, eat three meals a day, and live every year
Wang Xiaobo once wrote a very true sentence in his book:
"When people are young, they feel that there are people everywhere, and other people's business is your business.
It wasn't until halfway through the road that I realized that there was nothing left in the world but my family. ”
However, for some elderly people who have reached the twilight of their lives, perhaps the most unfortunate ones are:
Obviously not alone, but he must guard his cold home alone;
After working hard for half my life, I finally raised my children, but when I was sick in bed for a long time, I often did not see children;
Family is so close, yet it feels like they have nothing.
As they get older, they gradually realize that people who come without money, cars, or houses in their lives are not terrible.
The terrible thing is that after giving everything for half of his life, the children he finally raised are not as good as strangers.
01
The greatest grief of the family
This is raising ungrateful children
Recently saw a true story online:
While working in the hospital, the netizen received an 88-year-old man.
The old man was on crutches and walked unsteadily. He spoke broken Mandarin and tried to articulate his request clearly.
Everyone read it three times before they understood the old man's story: "I fell at home, I was cut in my hand, and I wanted to break the tetanus needle." ”
But because the old man had a big wound on his body, and he was alone, he could easily deal with the wound and send him to a large hospital for treatment.
The doctor on duty communicated with the elderly man to understand the situation, but she could not hear or speak clearly. He only remembered his son's phone number.
The director had no choice but to call his son, hoping that he would come to the hospital to take care of his mother.
The son on the other end of the line said he would be back soon, but two hours later he did not arrive and the phone went unanswered.
Everyone could only comfort the old man: "Wait a little longer, and my son will come." ”
The old man listened, and said helplessly: "My son? He won't come. When I left, I told him I was injured and wanted to go to the hospital, but he just sat on the bar and couldn't get in. "Down."
"He sat on the bar and wouldn't come down." After only nine words, the old man calmly finished speaking, and everyone present was silent.
Then the old man took out the paper and wiped his tears. She was thin and waited from five p.m. to seven p.m.
Until the netizen quit his job, he did not wait for his son.
That night seemed to be the longest night; The old man became the loneliest guard.
As a parent, no matter how many ups and downs I have experienced, the ups and downs of not raising the "white-eyed wolf" make me even sadder.
There is a sentence in the letter "Where Has the Time Gone" that made many people cry:
"The whole life of giving birth to a daughter and raising a daughter is full of thoughts of children crying and laughing, and half of their lives with daily chores, only wrinkles remain on their faces." There are too many parents in this world, for the happiness of their children, they do not complain about hardships, and they do their best to enjoy it.
Human nature is often unpredictable. The saddest thing about a family is raising ungrateful children.
The popular TV series "An Home" has such a story:
In order to provide for their son's education, Mr. and Mrs. Yan came from the countryside to Shanghai to open a bun shop. They worked hard every day, got up early and sold steamed buns, and finally saved more than 3 million yuan.
After his son graduated, he planned to marry his girlfriend, so he offered his parents to buy a house with the three million.
Lao Yan discussed with his wife and thought that as long as his son had a good life in the future, the three million spent would be worth it, so he happily placed his son in Shanghai.
Soon, the decoration of the new house was completed, and the old Yan couple packed their luggage and happily rode a tricycle into their new home to reunite with their son.
Unexpectedly, my mother-in-law moved into the new house before them, and did not let the old couple in. Faced with such a situation, the son simply said: "You go back first." ”
In the end, the old Yan couple, who had nowhere to go, could only carry large and small burdens and return to the humble bun shop to live temporarily.
And these are actually a "new type of superstitious piety" that is now spreading:
The child is highly educated, literate, obviously has arms and legs, but he constantly asks his parents for help and depends on the elderly to live.
Parents spend half their lives raising their children to become talents, always showing their children's potential to others, but never thinking that they have no one to rely on.
Children naturally enjoy the efforts of their parents, while parents look at the children watching indifferently with tears in their eyes.
Children do not know anything about the word "filial piety", and parents can only wait endlessly for the rest of their lives.
02
Old age is the most cruel
There are prerequisites for filial piety in children
The writer Gorky has a very profound saying:
"The death of an old man is equivalent to the collapse of a museum."
This museum contains a person's life and the most precious family memories and family relationships in his life.
But the cruelest thing in the world is that the "museum" collapsed, and no one cared.
A few days ago, the news that Hunan multimillionaire Luo Mouzhong hanged himself in a psychiatric hospital caused heated discussions.
Luo Mouzhong's family conditions were not good when he was a child. Later, he used the money from the demolition as start-up capital, pulling sand, driving minibuses, and car repair shops. After years of hard work, he has accumulated tens of millions of wealth.
The 62-year-old has a son and a daughter, and now they have started their own family.
A few years ago, children often came to him and asked for money. His son asked for 400,000 yuan and his daughter for 880,000 yuan.
But when he transferred the property to the children, the children's attitudes changed dramatically. Not only did they ignore him, but from time to time they asked him about the living expenses of their grandchildren. Seeing that he was old and in poor health, Luo Mouzhong had to call his children, hoping that they could solve their pension problems by themselves.
Unexpectedly, communication was ineffective, and the children still sat idly. Enraged, he demanded that the children return the borrowed money, but was vehemently refused.
A few days later, Luo Mouzhong visited his son again to discuss unresolved issues. During this time, there was a fierce quarrel. He was so angry that he ruined his son's home.
Originally, it was just a family conflict, but to everyone's surprise, the son held a grudge and called the police. He also sent Luo Mouzhong to a psychiatric hospital on the grounds that his father was mentally ill.
Subsequently, Luo Mouzhong explained many times, claiming that he was not sick. As a last resort, he wrote a "complaint" to ask for help from the outside world, saying that he was better off alive than dead, and felt like he was in hell.
On August 23, Luo Mouzhong, who was extremely desperate, ended his life in the hospital toilet and ended his anger at the child.
The cold and selfish child and the lonely and helpless father form a cold family, allowing family affection to turn into dust and cease to exist.
After reading this news, I can't help but think of a sentence: when a person reaches his old age, the cruelest thing is when he finally clearly sees that the future of his children is preconditioned.
If you can provide them with value, financial help, or life support, small filial piety may come up from time to time.
If not, the so-called "raising children to prevent aging" has become a joke.
In The Pinnacle Q&A, Venus mentions this:
Today, the three attributes of human beings have basically disappeared: the first is blood relations, and the relationship between children and parents is getting farther and farther apart; The third is kinship.
The second is geographical linkage. Many elderly people move to another city for their children and live in a strange place. Geographical connections are disappearing;
And as you retire, you have less and less social contact with the outside world, and social bonds slowly disappear.
Therefore, at this stage, older people feel particularly lonely, and this loneliness often accompanies them throughout their lives into old age.
Love, they say, is ultimately conscience.
If you think about it, perhaps parents and children still maintain a rare blood relationship by conscience in the end.
As a child, don't be too your parents and don't let the way home leave you in endless waiting.
No matter how far one goes, one cannot forget where one's roots are, let alone lose one's conscience.
Please don't let childish piety become a bargaining chip in exchange, and don't chill the people who love you in the world.
Life is a cycle. Children will have a day of parenthood, and there will always be a day of old age.
Don't wait until people reach middle age to know the kindness of their parents, and don't wait until regret is irretrievable to look back.
All blessings and misfortunes in the world have cause and effect, and so do all family affection.
The filial piety you have paid will come back to you little by little at some point in the future.
03
When you are old, who will support you?
Bai Yansong once said a cruel but very realistic sentence: "We are destined to be the last generation to follow our parents, and the first generation to be abandoned by our children."
Although your legs and paws can still move, and you can make your own decisions, prepare for the future and retain the dignity of your old age early. ”
How to enjoy old age and age gracefully is a test that everyone cannot miss.
Although as the saying goes: everyone's old age is a bloody storm.
But as long as you plan ahead, plan ahead, and prepare for retirement, you can still live through your old age safely.
Your life is filled with too much uncertainty than blindly trusting your children and others.
Better nourish the body and mind during the golden period of life. If you bring yourself an umbrella, you won't get wet from the rain.
When people are old, they must first leave themselves these three retreats and dare to fight the unknown:
Keep your money in your pocket: how much savings you have, how many retreats you have in life, and how many risks you can avoid for the rest of your life. When a storm comes, as long as you have your own roof, you don't have to worry about unexpected surprises.
Keep your body disease-free: exercise more at leisure, have a regular schedule, eat a balanced diet, and check regularly. Good health and good health are the prerequisites for happiness in old age.
Don't worry about anything: Don't worry about things that haven't happened yet, and don't think about the past. Adjust your mindset, cultivate emotions, let go of unnecessary worries, and meet each day with a positive and optimistic attitude.
Secondly, no matter how old you are, you must do these three things well and take care of your current life:
Cultivate hobbies: When people are busy, life is full. Finding things that interest you, such as practicing calligraphy, painting, climbing mountains, planting flowers and grass, dancing in the square, etc., can become a driving force.
Enrich your knowledge: read more, study more, enrich your soul, don't let yourself be limited by age, but also be careful, beware of all kinds of scams, and keep every bit of your wealth.
Learn to enjoy life: As you get older, you should sigh less and smile more. After seeing the truth of life, you still love life.
Finally, try your best to manage family relationships. If you are with your family, talk to each other, understand and tolerate each other, and live a harmonious and beautiful life.
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I really like this quote "Flying House Travels":
"Happiness is not immortality, not big fish and meat, nor power.
Happiness is the fulfillment of every small wish in life, eating when you want to eat, and being loved when you want to be loved. ”
I hope that children around the world can often go home to see, accompany their parents more, know how to think differently, and treat the elderly who have worked hard for half their lives.
I hope that parents all over the world can enjoy their old age in peace, eat enough three meals a day, and live well all year round.
Press "Search" and hope that every elderly person can receive support, support and peace of mind in their old age, and live a happy and fulfilling life. Author: An orange is an orange. This article was first published in Dushu369 (ID: dushu369com). Read 10,000 books and travel 10,000 miles. Reading Jun listens to classics with you, reads American texts, and lights up life with reading! Contact Reading 369 for reprints.
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