34-year-old unmarried young woman Qingyan, beautiful looking, white skin, professional garden designer.
In any way, she has the potential of Bai Fumei, and there is no ups and downs emotional experience.
During college, there were many people who pursued her; after graduation, there were many relatives and friends who introduced her to her, but she refused all of them.
People around her even thought she had psychological problems, but she told me stories about her mother.
01
My mother graduated from secondary school and was assigned to work in the sales department of a well-known commercial enterprise in the city after graduation.
My mother was not very pretty, but her face was beautiful and gentle, her figure was slim and plump, especially her voice was particularly gentle and sweet.
She likes to read, very little bourgeois, very literary.
It may be the appearance of a good woman that many men yearn for in their hearts.
My father was excellent, at least that's what I thought.
He graduated from the architecture department of a key university, his family is rural, he looks very bookish, and he is a cultural person at first glance.
My father was not at home for many years, running with the project all over the country, and my mother often took me to stay alone in the empty house.
When his father returned, his mother was also gentle with him, and he was a virtuous wife.
However, as soon as my father went on a business trip, my mother seemed to have changed into a different person.
Others think that I am small and do not understand things, but in fact, I am relatively precocious, and I have long been aware that my mother is different from the mother of other people's children.
Mother she had many good lovers, and when my father was not at home, they would come to the house for the night.
My mother would sometimes drop me off at my grandmother's house, but I would come back on weekends.
There are a few who come more often or have been in contact with my mother for a long time, and I am familiar with them, and my mother makes me call them "uncle" or "brother".
02
There is an Uncle Li with a small "eight-character beard", who is a colleague of my mother and the first man to have contact with her.
If Uncle Lee is a little taller and more powerful, he is like "Robert Taylor" in "Soul Break Blue Bridge".
Every time he came, he would bring chocolates or cookies or other snacks to make me happy.
He speaks with humor, likes to tell jokes, and often makes his mother laugh.
You can see that Mom is very happy with him.
His father, an engineer, is relatively taciturn and has no time to spend with his family.
Perhaps, this is the reason why my mother and this "eight-character beard" uncle came and went.
Uncle Lee also has a family, and there are no impermeable walls in the world.
Once, when I came home from kindergarten, I saw a young woman standing outside the door of the unit and looking inside.
She was holding a boy my age.
When the boy saw me, he spat at me and scolded me, "Don't you have a father?" Also came to rob my dad, really don't face. ”
I suddenly understood that this was supposed to be the son of Uncle Bazihu, who had come with his mother to fight my mother.
I don't remember how the problem was solved later, I just remember that Uncle Li didn't come to my house for a long time.
03
After this incident, the mother stopped for a while.
However, my father once went to Inner Mongolia on a business trip, and it took a month to go.
Another man came to the house regularly.
To be precise, this is a boy, as if he is not yet 20 years old, and my mother asked me to call him Brother Liu.
This boy was met by my mother at the wine table, very handsome, tall, and looked like a small fresh meat in a Korean drama.
After Brother Liu graduated from high school, he did not enter the university and entered the company by his father.
That day, my mother and he happened to go to the downstream dealer unit to collect money, and when it was time for dinner, they gathered together to entertain.
The manager of the unit was very active in hosting dinner, the payment was not active, and he said to my mother and the boy, a glass of wine is ten thousand yuan, whoever drinks more, pays more.
Where the fledgling boy passed through this formation, he was directly blinded.
My mother drank a good amount of wine, drank 20 cups in one go, and helped the big boy drink 10 cups; he took back 200,000 yuan, and the boy returned 100,000 yuan.
Brother Liu was so grateful that he even admired my mother and often sent things to my house.
Somehow, the two of them got better.
Their lover relationship spread far and wide in the industry, and even affected the boy's marriage.
Once I came home on the weekend and saw an old man kneeling in front of my mother crying bitterly, "You let my son go, he still has to get married and have children, you can't ruin him!" ”
I knew who it was.
Later, my mother was afraid that this matter would make a big fuss and cut off contact with the boy.
04
Later, when I was in junior high school, my mother had another lover, a man nearly 10 years older than my mother, who almost became my stepfather.
This man was the department manager of my mother's unit, and because of his strong business ability, he was transferred to the sales department.
When he arrived in my mom's department, sales boomed, and salaries and bonuses rose.
And he himself got 120,000 yuan at the end of the year, which was an astronomical amount in the 90s.
This manager, Uncle Song, has become an idol of my mother, and my mother often mentions this manager before and after her, saying that he is capable.
At this year's Canton Fair, Uncle Song took my mother and other departments to Guangzhou for a week on a business trip.
After returning, this Uncle Liu often came and went to my house.
Uncle Song can't have no family at such an age! And it's a family with a wife.
It may be that people reach middle age, and once the feelings come up, it is like the old house is on fire, burning up and not saving;
It may also be that I am tired of the "Hedong Lion Roar" at home, and suddenly fell into my mother's gentle township and can't extricate myself.
In short, this Uncle Song seems to have been deceived by my mother, and he has to go home to divorce;
My mother's side is also different from the past, she feels that this time she has found a harbor of life, and also filed a divorce with my father.
05
Unable to resist the determination of both of them, the marriage was still divorced.
My mother and Uncle Song also took a marriage license, and Uncle Song also gave me a mouthful of "my girlfriend", and when I went to the big city, I often brought me novel gifts.
I don't want this guy to be my dad, but my dad travels all day, and I just follow my mom, but I never call him "dad."
Married life has always been the graveyard of love, the ideal is very full, the reality is very bone.
My mom and Uncle Song divorced less than a year after they were married.
The reason is very simple, although this Uncle Song has strong business ability, his ability to take care of himself is very poor.
Although his ex-wife is very fierce, she can serve the big manager well, eat well at home, prepare luggage for business trips, and even tie his shoelaces.
But my mother is full of literary and artistic petty bourgeois sentiments in her bones, and she can serve people, never my grandparents, but my father.
What she longs for is the kind of romance, electric flint-like love.
Uncle Song lives with her, can't even eat hot food, and has to meet her various emotional needs.
Soon it was overwhelmed, the freshness passed, and the ex-wife and son did not break contact with him.
06
That day Uncle Song came home and ate a meal of braised prawns, steamed mandarin fish, winter melon stewed ribs made for him by his ex-wife...
When he came back, he mentioned divorce to my mother, "Our marriage was too hasty, we really didn't fit." ”
Where can my mother be willing, crying and making trouble, and even opened the gas canister, scaring Uncle Song from mentioning this matter.
But his ex-wife and son have been "dark Chen Cang" with Uncle Song, and my mother hates it so much that her teeth itch and she has no choice.
Then something very disgraceful happened that made my mother let go.
One day Uncle Song's ex-wife and my mother met in a narrow road at the entrance of the mall.
New hatred and old hatred surged into his heart, and his ex-wife grabbed my mother's hair on the spot and scolded her.
A bunch of her sisters came up and ripped my mother's clothes, tearing up all the underwear and panties, and my mother struggled desperately for help.
Many people are watching from the side, pointing and pointing, women's hatred of the little three cut teeth, no one called the police, and the men were happy to watch the hilarity.
Later, the mall was affected, and the security guard came out and sent a group of them to the police station.
When she came back, my mom felt that the marriage she insisted on might put her life at risk.
After this incident, my mother agreed to divorce.
On the day of their divorce, Uncle Song's son went to the door of our community and put a whip.
07
Leaving Uncle Song, my mom asked me to tell my dad that she was divorced and single again.
What I couldn't understand was that my dad could accept her turning back.
A month later, my father and mother remarried and got their marriage licenses again.
Although our family of three was reunited, I was not happy at all, even ashamed, and not worth it for my father.
I was already in high school by then, and I was afraid that others would look at our family with disdain.
I applied for a live-in school and didn't want to go home.
My father also felt that he could not stay in this city, so he applied to work in a branch office in another province.
I took my mom and me with me and arranged for my mom to do logistics work in his company.
Moreover, my father felt that it was because he could not accompany my mother, and my mother was too lonely and lonely, which led to cheating again and again.
He even applied for back-office work on the grounds that he was older and had more time to take care of his family.
In the three years of high school, my family was safe and sound, because I wanted to take the college entrance examination, and the focus of the whole family was on me.
08
In the blink of an eye, I was already in college, studying garden design at the Provincial Forestry University.
I inherited my dad's genes and had some talent for design.
When I came home from the summer vacation of my freshman year, I went to play with my high school classmate Hui Hui, and we lived in a compound and went to and from school together for three years in high school.
When I got to her house, her parents were there, and the whole family looked at me with a strange look, and I felt as if something should have happened in the year I was out.
I dragged Lin Huihui out and pressed her repeatedly, and she said that the rumors in the compound were crazy, saying that your mother cheated on Chairman Li of the union and was caught.
I was suddenly petrified, and my mother could not control her beating heart after all.
I quietly asked my dad, and my dad scolded me, don't listen to other people's nonsense, and then sigh and be silent;
And my mother didn't seem to have anything happening, eating, shopping, dancing, her heart was always so big.
The next day, I was on my way back to school.
09
Since my sophomore year, I have rarely returned home, working as a tutor, training teacher, internship, and various part-time jobs in the provincial city.
Don't send tuition and living expenses at home, I'm ashamed of my mom's behavior over the years.
Later, I applied for a design firm in Shanghai, not wanting to go back to work in the two cities where I once grew up.
I don't dare to fall in love, I am afraid that others will know what kind of person my mother is, and will say "the upper beam is not right and the lower beam is crooked".
I don't dare to get married, I'm afraid that my future lover will justifiably cheat.
Some people say that I have psychological problems, but it is better to say that this has become my "heart demon".
My parents would also come to see me, or call me and urge me to fall in love or get married.
I always avoided it, taking care of him.
When I was in a hurry, I really wanted to say to them out loud, it is because there is such a mother that I never believe in love and marriage, how do you let me fall in love and get married?
I have always wondered whether my mother's behavior is a psychological problem, a physical problem, or a character problem.
Parents, in order to satisfy their own desires, are so wanton that they cannot establish a correct view of love and marriage for their children.
All that is left for children is psychological shadow and pain.