Suppose your child comes home from school at five o'clock in the afternoon, and he doesn't arrive home at half past five, are you worried?
It's almost six o'clock and you haven't arrived home yet, are you worried?
You are not only worried, are you all afraid and afraid.
So you call the person you should be looking for, find the place you should be looking for, and you find nothing.
You can't help it, you stand alone at the door of the community waiting for him to return, just standing here less than five minutes, the child returned.
Tell me, what was your first reaction when you saw him?
There are many parents who go straight to the point.
Are you worried?
You're worried about him, so why don't you express your worries?
If you are really worried about the child, what should be your first reaction when you see him return?
I'm so worried about you, my parents are so worried about you, the family has already prepared the meal, waiting for you to come back and eat. You came back so late, where did you go, you tell your father.
You are genuinely worried, you express concern, the child collects your worry. So, in order not to let you worry about him, the child behaves less and less.
However, you are obviously worried about him in your heart, but you express anger and accusations, and the child collects your anger and accusations. So the child learns to lie in order not to make you angry and accuse him. At the same time, because you are so good at anger and accusations against him, he successfully teaches you how to be angry and blame others, including how to anger and accuse you.
Whoever gives birth to a child is the same for him, and all this is the result of the willfulness of the parents.
So we need to be a scientific parent, not a wayward parent.