The water is silent, and the people are steady.
Hiding any one thing is the pattern; any kind of difficulty, calming down is the skill.
Many people are willing to be alone, but they have to interact with people.
As the saying goes, "Distance produces beauty." ”
Only by mixing up society, getting along with anyone, maintaining an appropriate distance, and reducing the intersection of emotions and interests to a minimum, can the relationship be long-lasting and stable.
Therefore, good relationships are mostly adjusted to silent mode.
01
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law interact and go back to their respective homes.
There is a hot topic: do you want your mother-in-law to bring your children?
In fact, the mother-in-law has no obligation to take the grandson at all, and people are only distressed that the son and daughter-in-law are too tired to work, so they take the initiative to take the lead. Don't tie your mother-in-law and grandson together.
Netizen "xiaogli820" said that at that time, the child was born by caesarean section. The mother-in-law took care of her in the hospital, but at night, the mother-in-law slept very deeply and could not wake up. She can only move her body vigorously to help the child change the diaper.
Later, she pulled the child up alone and let her mother-in-law go back to her hometown.
As the old saying goes, "Mother-in-law is also mother." ”
Reality tells you that there is a difference between mother-in-law and mother-in-law, and mother-in-law and mother-in-law will be estranged from their children, and if they spend a long time together, it is inevitable that there will be contradictions.
If you want to have a harmonious family, you must learn to "separate the family". The mother-in-law and the son and daughter-in-law live separately, the family is smaller, but there is more laughter and laughter, and the noise has become particularly small, and it is no longer necessary to stare at the small eyes.
02
Relatives interact, less to visit the door.
In my impression, relatives sit together and talk the most about the topic that is the east and the west. For example, if a girl from a relative's family is thirty years old and has no object, is there a problem? Have you ever been hurt by feelings?
Some words that seem to be intentional or unintentional, it is very happy to talk about, but it is very hurtful.
No one can guarantee that all relatives are of high quality and cannot block anyone's mouth. If there are frequent visits between relatives, the reception will be troublesome and is laborious and unflattering.
During the New Year's Festival, relatives eat a meal at a hotel and then go home separately; at the red and white weddings, everyone gathers together to help each other, which is the best way to get along.
No visits, less chat, but less contradictions, no interference with each other.
03
Friends are clear about right and wrong.
As the saying goes, "Brothers, settle the account." ”
No matter how good the relationship between friends is, we must clearly distinguish between "inside and outside". Externally, friends are a group, and internally, friends are multiple individuals.
When helping each other, don't take it for granted, and you can't be without rules.
A friend of mine borrowed five hundred dollars from me ten years ago. Later, he went to Guangdong to work, and the contact between us gradually decreased.
The money, he should have no intention of returning, and the contact information, was also replaced.
Although the money is not much, but because of this mess of the rules, friends can not do it, and in the future to see each other, it will be particularly embarrassing. The best way to get along is to maintain a relative balance between affection and affection, and the two do not owe each other.
When people's hearts are balanced, there are naturally fewer emotions such as disputes, jealousy, resentment, and discomfort.
04
Colleagues interact, people go tea cool.
In fact, people take tea cold, there are two meanings. First, when colleagues leave the unit, go to another unit, or retire, everyone's interaction is less, and no one looks at anyone's face; second, after work, everyone goes home separately, do not mix the workplace and life together.
Many people, in the workplace, like to call their colleagues brothers and brothers, idle, often gathered together to eat and drink. Such an approach makes no sense except to waste money.
Don't treat the workplace as your home, and don't treat your colleagues as family. Everyone is together to make money to support the family, but also because of some kind of interest, we have to cooperate.
If you don't bring everything in the workplace to the time after work, your life will be quieter.
05
Classmates interact, and it is better to see each other than to miss each other.
I've seen a story about a man in his forties who attended several class reunions. Many years ago, the man's family was very poor and often looked down upon by his classmates, but now he has become rich, and his classmates are impressed by him.
At the party, the man confessed to the female classmates he once liked, and there were several female classmates and he secretared me.
After the party, the man posted a very intimate photo in the circle of friends. Turning around, there was a husband of a female classmate, who saw the intimate photos, and was immediately angry, and had to divorce.
"This time, another time", everyone should look forward, rather than pinning their feelings on a certain day in the past.
Classmates are friendships, which used to be very simple, but over time, earth-shaking changes will occur. Something beautiful, like a fragile piece of jade, if you try too hard, it will shatter and become worthless.
Those lively and lively class reunions, the group of classmates who ridicule each other, in the end, hurt the family and lost the love of the same window. It is better not to see each other, in each other's minds, there are faint memories, just ok.
06
Husband and wife, turn a blind eye.
There was a wife who found a woman's long hair on her husband's coat, so she asked her husband every day whose hair it was.
The husband could not argue with each other, and could only pretend to be deaf and dumb. But the wife did not forgive, from questioning, to persecution, to divorce, all in one go.
The good end of the home, because of a hair, lost.
Be calm when things happen, impulsiveness is the devil. Many couples, because of the "unwarranted" things, the feelings are completely lost. If you know how to think quietly, let go of those things that are obstructing your eyes, and don't care about gains and losses, your feelings can be long-lasting.
"A stone stirs up a thousand waves", husband and wife get along, the key is to give up "one stone".
07
Confucius said, "A gentleman speaks with deeds, and a villain speaks with his tongue." ”
It is better to use actions to reflect feelings than to say a thousand words; to use rules to restrain feelings is better than subjective assumptions and individual conjectures.
Adjust the mobile phone to mute mode, you will not be disturbed by various information; if you adjust your life to silent mode, you can focus on doing yourself; if you adjust the relationship to silent mode, you can reduce the contradiction to the minimum and invite the troubles out of life.
In this life, there are hundreds of thousands of people encountered, and how many people can talk to each other?
What can sustain relationships is not always gathering, but with principled help, effective distancing, and appropriate silence.
People-to-people interactions need greetings, concerns, and even more need to be quiet and calm.
An overly lively way of interacting is not good for anyone.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.