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Since the last update of the first article 30 years old, my in-laws have been sunny in the past few days. At first, Gou-chan went to work at the company, and as the people in the office finished one after another, he began to work from home. But at the end of the year, he was busy with work, so the work of bringing the baby and eating three meals a day, which was originally the work of three people (me and my in-laws), now all fell on my shoulders, and I became the person carrying the banner in the family.
So, during this time, there is no time to work. Every night at 9 o'clock, when the little doll went to sleep, I was tired and paralyzed in place, and I didn't even want to look at my mobile phone. I slept last night, woke up in the middle of the night, picked up my mobile phone, sat alone in the living room, and wrote this broken thought, I want to share it with you.
【Chosen daily life with baby + cook】
Get up every day, busy from breakfast to dinner; From the first diaper in the morning to the baby's bath and sleep...
The life of a full-time mother is really not easy, especially when the baby is not yet able to walk and is still breastfeeding, and any needs must be given feedback. Many times, it is while washing clothes and coaxing the baby; While cooking, coaxing the baby; Eat with one hand and hold the baby in the other.
A little more relaxed every day, probably after lunch, take her to sit on the balcony to bask in the sun, and you can briefly put down your hands.
The chosen cooks are really not vain, and they are changing their patterns every day to make all kinds of food. Brunch will be eaten differently, and dinner is basically four dishes and one soup, while considering nutrition, but also taking into account the taste.
Daily, I am already busy and exhausted between bringing a baby + three meals a day, so all self-media work has been suspended.
[Those women who grasp both family and business have helpers behind them]
The balance between work and family is an eternal human life issue for women. With or without a baby is a watershed moment for women to accept this challenge, marriage is not! Therefore, the life after having a baby is another look, and if there is no baby, it is not considered a complete sense of custom.
After becoming a woman who needs to balance family and work, I really realized how important it is to have a helper in life.
Although my mother-in-law is not as diligent as my mother and can do all the housework by herself, I am already grateful that she and her father-in-law can help me bring the baby during the day and then cook the meal. Because of this, I can spare 5-6 hours during the day to work and take care of my own things.
If women after giving birth to a baby, without helpers in life, will really be entangled in chicken feathers and will become more and more tired. Therefore, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law basically does not exist in my family! Because I never put my in-laws on the opposite side of the relationship, and positioned them as helpers in my life, allowing me to free up and do something of my own. Therefore, once the concept of relationship is changed, how can it be too demanding for such a helper who contributes money and effort!
Some habits are different, just tolerate each other; Where you really can't accept it, just do it yourself. The quality of the in-laws is very high, you express the difference with your actions, and people will understand. Therefore, there is no need to express dissatisfaction in the form of arguments or complaints.
[I began to learn slowly: patience and love]
Through the 24-hour intimate bringing of the baby in the past few days, the greater gain is: I feel that I am more and more patient and loving with her.
Before, I took her to play for a while and wanted to lose it to my in-laws, and I wanted to hurry up to attend to my own business, so I rarely hugged her during the day except for breastfeeding + occasionally taking her to nap. In the past few days, after having to take her 24 hours, although my arms hurt to hold her, I was extremely patient, very tolerant of any of her emotions, and willing to communicate with her and smile at her every time. This kind of parent-child relationship makes me feel very comfortable and very good.
The little doll seems to be born with the ability to heal, and every day I see her trying to breastfeed, the way she sleeps sweetly, and the way she smiles at me, which makes my heart melt! Therefore, after giving birth to a baby, I understood a sentence: You are my armor and my weakness.
Because of the baby, I really understand what it is to love you as life, because she is really the one who can give my life away.
Recently, we have had a hard time, my in-laws have become sunny one after another, my mother's family thousands of miles away has also become yang, and I, Gou Can and the little doll, although still in the yin, but live in the anxiety and trivial housework of the phantom sun every day. At the end of 2022, we are like experiencing calamities, and only by surviving the past can we welcome a better 2023. Let's do it together!
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About the author
Soloist: Freelance writer, Australian working holidaymaker, growing brand person, focusing on personal growth, reading and writing.