Dad is a university teacher, so I grew up in the dean of the school's family, most of my children are teachers' children, many students in the family home are particularly excellent in learning, many children of teachers' families have grown into children in the eyes of others, learning is particularly excellent, all the way to escort, and even study abroad and settle abroad. Now that the father's generation has been retired for several years, their group of old people chatting together, nothing more than chatting about some children of various families, occasionally showing off, children give themselves filial mobile phones, tablets, clothes, imported nutrients and other things. In the past, when I went to school and worked, I was a fighter, but now these fathers start to fight children after retirement, to see whose son has the ability and whose daughter has the ability.
In my generation, many children with excellent learning have chosen to study abroad, and families with double teachers also have this condition to let their children go abroad, so when I was in school, I often heard my parents say which children in the hospital went to England, France, the United States, and so on. Especially in those years, as long as whose children went abroad to study, it seems that the parents of this family are superior in the yard, and their heads are raised high when walking, as if they are telling others all the time, see how good my child is, and see how competitive my child is.
Image from Baidu
My father's colleague, Teacher Xue, who teaches applied chemistry, our neighbor, six or seven years older than my father, is also 745 years old this year, Teacher Xue's girl is six years older than me, I call her sister, I remember when I was a child, my sister often gave me snacks to eat. When I was in my first year of high school, my sister went abroad for graduate school and went to Harvard University in the United States, and it was really big news in our institute at that time, even our dean went to Mr. Xue's house to congratulate him, and Mr. Xue's house was beautiful during that time. After graduation, his girl went to work in Silicon Valley, and later found an American partner and settled in the United States. I heard Mr. Xue say that the younger couple are both senior engineers, with an annual salary of millions of dollars, and they are properly middle-class Americans.
When the girl got married, Teacher Xue and his lover went for less than two months and came back, the old colleagues in the courtyard said that Teacher Xue and the old couple were blessed and would not enjoy, others squeezed their heads and wanted to go abroad to see, Teacher Xue came back in less than two months, Teacher Xue said that the local living habits could not stand it, and they ate steak butter bread every day, and they were not used to eating. But Teacher Xue took out the most advanced Apple 4 mobile phone at that time from his pocket, saying that his daughter bought it, and it took more than 5,000 yuan in China, and I heard that a mobile phone had a salary of nearly two months, for those old people who have been thrifty all their lives, it is simply unbelievable, all praising Teacher Xue's girls for being filial and capable. This incident spread in the courtyard at that time, and Mr. Xue's lover often said in front of a group of old ladies that the girl bought a tablet for thousands, and sent a bottle of health care products for hundreds, which made the old people in the courtyard at that time envious to death!
Because my academic performance is also average, after graduating from college, I will look for a job locally, and I originally wanted to see it from afar, but I want to work in the field and have to live by myself, where I am comfortable at home, meals are ready-made, and my parents can also take care of my life, so I have always stayed by my parents' side, and occasionally gnawed the old. So they got married and had children, and they all lived with their parents. Later, when my parents were older, my daughter-in-law and I took the initiative to take on the housework at home, and my parents' main job was to help pick up and drop off the children, and the school was not far away, just opposite the community. Dad usually goes to the elderly activity room in the courtyard when he has nothing to do, playing cards, chess, and chatting with a group of old friends.
As the days passed, my parents grew older day by day. The tireless and spirited teachers who stood on the podium were gone, replaced by gray-haired, slow-moving old men and ladies. We are maturing day by day, parents are getting old day by day, and many old people in the yard have become empty nesters, just like birds grow up, their wings are hardened, and without their parents, their parents will be alone in the empty nest. Of course, people and animals are different, birds fly away, basically never come back, people go out to explore the world, will always think about this home.
Image from Baidu
In fact, in our family home, there is also this habit, if you live in a hospital with your parents, children who do not live together, basically two or three days will visit their parents, buy some food and send some meat, parents are uncomfortable, and can send parents to the hospital to see a doctor. If you live in a city, you can basically visit your parents once a week or half a month. If the children settle in other provinces, they basically come back to visit their parents every New Year's holiday. Those of us who live with our parents, whether for us or for our parents, are quite relieved, because our parents are getting older, and the most reassuring thing we can do is the health of our parents. Of course, there is also a kind of children in our hospital who cannot come back to visit their parents for a year or even several years, most of them are the group that was called other people's children at that time, the group with excellent academic performance, and the group who went abroad to study and settle down.
I remember that since Mr. Xue's girl went to the United States, probably because of her busy work, she has only come back once in so many years. What caused it to come back? It was because Mr. Xue's lover had kidney failure caused by long-term diabetes and finally had to be dialyzed. At that time, his girl came back, and after a week of returning, probably busy with work, she hurriedly went back. As soon as the girl left, Teacher Xue was left to take care of her lover, dialysis is three times a week, Teacher Xue's family lives on the fourth floor, because it is an old house, there is no elevator, Teacher Xue's lover is still relatively fat, after dialysis, people are particularly weak, Teacher Xue also has to help his lover step by step to slowly climb upstairs, for normal people, a matter of minutes, they need nearly 20 minutes. Since he had to go to the hospital every other day, Teacher Xue bought an electric tricycle with a shed and took his lover to the hospital. Later, Teacher Xue felt that climbing the fourth floor was too laborious, so he rented a first-floor house near the hospital and no longer had to climb stairs.
In May 2020, my father's retirement group suddenly released an obituary, Mr. Xue's lover died due to complications caused by kidney failure, and we didn't see his daughter when we went to the memorial service, maybe at that time foreigners were not allowed to return to China, so his daughter did not come back. The death of his lover made Teacher Xue a lot older all of a sudden, although he said that he moved back to live in the courtyard, but in the past, Teacher Xue's smile could no longer be seen, and he was unwilling to go to the activity room in the courtyard, let alone speak, and became very lonely and desolate. At that time, we all told him that he should not let him go to his daughter's place, or find him a nanny, and Teacher Xue did not agree to live or die.
The death of his lover also hit Teacher Xue very hard, or it may be that the string that had been tight suddenly relaxed, and Teacher Xue suddenly fell ill at home. At that time, no one knew, or my dad had something to find him, the phone has not answered, so I went to his house to find him, the door was locked but the mobile phone kept ringing, Dad felt wrong, so he called me, after I went, while letting my father call the police, he began to hit the door, fortunately, the quality of the security door of Mr. Xue's house was not very good, and the door was knocked open in a few clicks, and found that Mr. Xue was lying on the floor of the living room, and Dad went up to rush to emergency rescue, I quickly called 120, and soon the police and ambulance came, and the doctor hurriedly began to rescue, I started looking for someone, carried Teacher Xue, who was in a coma, to the ambulance, and then went to the hospital to go through the admission procedures.
To be honest, this is the first time I have taken care of a patient in the hospital, and my mother and my mother-in-law took care of my daughter-in-law when she was hospitalized to give birth. During the day, my dad and their colleagues changed shifts, my mother made a meal, my dad's colleague sent the meal to the hospital, I went to the hospital after work to take care of it, in fact, I set up a small bed next to Mr. Xue's bed to sleep for one night, at night if Mr. Xue got up at night, he would help him go to the bathroom, buy breakfast in the morning, and when my dad and they came to take over, I would go to work. The doctors and nurses in the hospital all regarded me as Mr. Xue's son, saying that I was really filial, I said that I was not his son, I was his neighbor, his family was a girl, the girl was abroad, and now she can't come back.
After Teacher Xue was discharged from the hospital, he had to invite us all to eat together, saying that this time it was not us, he might really see Marx, and during the meal, someone asked him, how to live alone now, or hire a nanny, Teacher Xue is unwilling, saying that his old masters, can do anything, and hiring a nanny is not suitable. Later, someone said that Teacher Xue went to the United States to defect to his daughter, Teacher Xue's face changed all of a sudden, and then he drank alcohol, and then got drunk, hugged my father and a few of them said, now I really regret sending my daughter so far, I can't see it, and I can't count on anything. Knowing this, it is better to let my daughter be in the country, and I can count on it, I really envy the families like us whose children are around. Later, Mr. Xue and the elderly who did not often return to the hospital went to live in a nursing home.
Unexpectedly, the epidemic has lasted for three years, and in the past three years, Mr. Xue's words describe himself as like a child that no one wants, thrown around by the nursing home, living in a nursing home when there is no epidemic, and being picked up by the nursing home as soon as there is an epidemic, repeated several times. Especially after the epidemic, Teacher Xue said that he would never go to a nursing home again, and no matter how difficult it was, he would have to live at home.
In our family home, there are many cases of Kochi families like Teacher Xue who do not return when their children go abroad for many years, especially in the past three years, I have seen it very obviously. Every New Year's holiday, you will find that these empty nesters are not in a very good state, seem so lonely, so lonely, especially when the lights of ten thousand families are reunited, you will find them so helpless and desolate. The reunion during the Spring Festival is the happiest and most anticipated thing for every Chinese, but for these elderly people, it is luxury and pain. Sometimes I think about my daughter going to junior high school this year, should I raise her very well, and if she leaves me far away in the future, should I be happy or sad?
Image from Baidu
The Spring Festival is coming soon, I hope that those children who cannot come back due to the impact of the epidemic, this year's policy has been opened, be sure to come back to see your parents, so that your parents can also enjoy the happiness of reunion. Or that you have accepted foreign ideas and forgotten the filial piety culture of the Chinese nation, you should also take the time to come back and see, because there is still the person who cares about you the most, that is, the parents who gave birth to you and raised you!
Filial piety to the elderly, companionship is very important!