Image source network, the same below
01
Hanging on the hot search for several days, the series of big melons "Zhang Tianai and Naza tearing Xu Kaicheng (reading cheng, not reading pin)" remains hot.
The ins and outs of the matter are clear to everyone, so I will not repeat it, in short, it is a triangular relationship.
After the two actresses turned over the scumbag and hammered the scumbag with nowhere to turn over and look for teeth on the ground, the male protagonist could not deny it, and sent a long apology article in gray.
Probably said that he and Zhang Tianai were separated and merged many times in a few months, a one-night stand with a girl occurred during a breakup with Zhang Tianai, and a relationship with Naza occurred after the last complete breakup with Zhang Tianai.
In short, it is based on the unit of days, secretly rubbing to excuse themselves, emphasizing that there is no cheating and no leg splitting, but it is not handled well.
The explicit accusations of "cheating" by netizens and women have been blurred into controversial issues.
There is still room for cunning (netizens believe it or not is another matter), but it is certain that he has no sense of boundaries during the relationship.
Because there is no sense of boundaries, when you are still disconnected from your ex, you can casually have a one-night stand with a strange woman after drinking, and then you can have an affair with another girl without stopping.
In the end, the East Window incident occurred, and the quasi-second-line actors who were originally in the rising period were ruined.
Not only will it soon disappear in the entertainment industry, but it may also face huge liquidated damages.
But paying these costs is not worthy of sympathy at all, and is purely self-inflicted and self-inflicted.
The Xu Kaicheng incident reminds me of Wu Jing's hot search some time ago: #Wu Jing twice refused and avoided female guests holding hands.
02
It turned out that at one event, there was a female guest on the scene, who tried to hold Wu Jing's hand twice.
The first time Wu Jing stared with his eyes, until the female guest herself felt embarrassed to let go of her hand. The second time, he directly withdrew his hand and refused the female guest with a smile.
At first, I thought Wu Jing was a bit fussy, didn't he just hold hands? Isn't it common for people to be enthusiastic about giving back to their fans as a public figure?
But now I think that Wu Jing's two textbook rejections can be called the representative of male Durban senior students, interpreting the wisdom of adults to maintain a sense of boundaries.
As a married man, taking the initiative to keep a distance from the strange opposite sex is the respect and love for his wife and his family, and it is also the best way to protect himself.
Strange women can be allowed to hold hands today, tomorrow they can be accepted to shoulder each other, and even kisses the day after tomorrow are accustomed.
Even if you can bear not to step on the boundary, but with Wu Jing's current status and influence, in case you encounter a girl with ulterior motives, from time to time send a small essay with a group photo, insinuation that you have a special relationship with Wu Jing, and the consequences are unimaginable.
At worst, it encounters a crisis of public opinion and damages its reputation;
His wife was scattered, his reputation was ruined, his career came to an abrupt end, and all his efforts were in vain.
03
The other day, a girlfriend of mine posted a screenshot in our chat group.
The screenshot shows that she is going to go on a business trip to borrow a laptop with a male colleague.
The male colleague replied to her: "We have such a deep relationship, I can't use borrowed words." Mine is yours, and yours is mine. ”
The girlfriend's original intention was to express that she mixed well with male colleagues and had a good relationship.
But as soon as this picture came out, I and two other friends in the group felt inappropriate.
If their respective other half sees their husband/wife chatting so ambiguously, how do they feel?
In the face of married men making such a no-limit joke, she did not care, thinking that this was a good expression of feelings between colleagues.
We all advised her to "brake" in time, euphemistically reminding male colleagues not to make such jokes casually.
In addition to warning male colleagues, taking the initiative to keep their distance, but also to show him attitude: they do not accept this kind of joke.
Otherwise, it may be the next Xu Xiangshan.
04
Xu Huanshan in "Thirty Only" was only ambiguous with Lin Youyou at the beginning.
Lin Youyou not only did not stop eating his ice cream, but also took a bite of the ice cream she had bitten, revealing an expression with endless aftertaste;
Distressed Lin Youyou wore high heels to accompany herself all day, the heel was worn by the shoes, "intimately" sent her a Band-Aid;
Lin Youyou pretended to accidentally send a wrong selfie, and replied ambiguously behind Gu Jia's back: You are too bad.
These unbounded behaviors are a dangerous signal at any time: you can chase me, I will not refuse.
It was that he gave Lin Youyou the opportunity to constantly test him, and did not deliberately keep a distance, so Lin Youyou took advantage of the drunkenness to constantly tempt him that night, saying that Xu Huanshan cared about her in his heart.
Then forcibly moved his face and kissed him, Xu Huanshan did not resist the temptation, and his body derailed.
A counselor once said something like this:
In the case of cheating consultation, I found a pattern, that is:
Many people, in fact, do not run to the purpose of cheating at the beginning, but gradually develop feelings in the interaction with the opposite sex, thus losing the sense of boundaries.
That's why married men and women have a sense of boundaries. It's not a joke, it's not unkind, it's not a fuss.
Only by stopping it in time and preventing all the signs of micro-prevention from gradually strangling all the signs in the swaddling can any subsequent possible events be eliminated.
05
Some people will also say, is it possible that after the other half, they should become Buddhas on the ground and not have contact with the opposite sex?
Of course not.
It's just that when dealing with the opposite sex, you must grasp the appropriate scale.
Remembering that I saw Happy Base Camp a long time ago, there was an issue that invited Zhu Yawen to participate. While making the game, there was a link where Zhu Yawen was asked to hug Wu Xin.
But Zhu Yawen resolutely refused, saying that he could give Teacher He a princess hug.
When asked why, he said very frankly that because he was married, he could not make such a move.
At that moment, everyone on the scene was applauding, and I was successfully fanned by him in front of the TV.
A reporter has asked Zhu Yawen what is the largest scale that can be accepted when filming intimate scenes?
Zhu Yawen replied, "If the wife can accept it, she will shoot, and if she can't accept it, she won't shoot." ”
So for so many years, the love story of Zhu Yawen and his wife has been talked about.
Married for seven years, with two children, the eyes of the wife are always full of appreciation and pampering.
In the entertainment industry, it is too difficult to clean up oneself, and in the eyes of fans, there is a halo of self-esteem, and there are a large number of die-hard fans who are willing to go forward and give hugs.
In the circle, even the daily opponent drama has a lot of opportunities to fake the real thing.
But Zhu Yawen, known as the "walking hormone", has not had any black material scandals in the past few years since his debut.
Because like Wu Jing, he is willing to keep his boundaries for the sake of his other half.
It is not difficult to keep the boundaries and reject the strange opposite sex, it depends on whether the heart is firm and really wants to refuse.
Now there are many men who say that their cheating events are fresh and unworldly, and they have to be affectionate.
Just like Xu Kaicheng, who attributed one-night stands to the effects of alcohol, just broke up in a bad mood.
Like Xu Huanshan, he shirked the mistake of not being able to withstand the temptation to make because Gu Jia was too strong, only knew how to make money, and she was too tired to live.
These are all, the real drunkenness is unconscious, Tarzan collapsed before he could not move, all the drunken chaos, are planned for a long time, through the strength of wine, take the initiative to release nature.
"Too perfect partner" is even more nonsense, Luo Zijun in "The First Half of My Life", eating, drinking and having fun every day, dressing up is full of flowers, Chen Junsheng is not the same as looking for Ling Ling.
06
There is a sentence in "Strange Story":
Marriage doesn't give you a sense of security, but people can.
All dealings with the opposite sex have an insurmountable line.
Keeping this line, not crossing the line, not fouling, knowing what to do and what not to do, is to give him a proper sense of security to be protected.
Only in this way can two people achieve each other and become the most beautiful in the nourishment of this relationship.